Except for his.
I shivered as the memory of his hands on me lit my body up instantly.
Yeah, I wasn’t really feeling Sasha looking at me like I’d lost my damn mind once I admitted all of that. So let her think I was talking about being a superficial woman who would drive her cousin crazy with all my wants and needs.
We walked the rest of the way in silence, my thoughts consumed with all the things I deemed “wrong” with me. I hated that part of myself even if I yearned for it. We stopped when we got to our cars parked side by side.
“Yeah, okay. I can see when a door is shut firmly. I’ll just tell him to leave it be and to move on. Although I’ve never seen him show so much interest in someone before.” She glanced up, then shrugged. “But it’s probably for the best.” She finally looked at me again. “Salvatore is what I like to call… old-school.”
I lifted a brow.
“Sal is a typical man who wants a woman to be his and only his. A possessive Italian to the core, even if he’d only be here for a short time.”
Great.
“And it’s not like he’s gonna stay in the States forever, and I’d hate for things to get serious between you two,” she said and gave me a sly smile, “and then he up and leaves and goes back to Italy.” She shrugged again and opened her driver-side door to toss her bag inside.
I thought about her words, really thought about how Salvatore wasn’t going to be in the States forever, like she’d said. And although the very thought of touching him in any way sent this wave of anxiety through me, I also knew that I had to stop living my life like this.
Afraid and worried.
Unsure and hesitant.
Maybe I had just never given myself the opportunity to allow someone into my life, too ashamed by what I felt and what I wanted that I’d blocked myself from feeling things? I didn’t think about the man at the club, about how he made me feel. I needed to start living and stop worrying, feeling ashamed.
Why not start now with the opportunity being presented?
I could try to live a normal life, although I didn’t want to make it sound like I was using Salvatore as a test subject. I couldn’t lie and say the prospect that he wouldn’t be around for long and would put an entire ocean between us at the end of… whatever this would be… gave me a sense of calm. Because there wouldn't be any real expectations or having to worry about what happened after it all. He’d be gone.
I could try… with him. It wouldn’t be serious, and of course I’d tell him that. We could take it one minute at a time.
Because truthfully I was tired of my “issues.” I was tired of finding fault in so much, of not being able to connect with anyone, of not being able to have a romantic interest touch me without feeling like my skin was being torn from my bones.
“Give him my number,” I said, and I saw the flair of surprise on Sasha’s face.
“What? Really?”
I nodded and opened my door. “Yeah. I thought Salvatore was really sweet, so I’m down for going to have coffee or drinks, or whatever.” I shrugged and tossed my bag in the passenger seat. “I’m not looking for anything serious, which I’ll let him know up front. But yeah, give him my number.”
She gave me a blinding grin, and I couldn’t help but chuckle at her enthusiasm. I was pretty sure she was more excited about this than I was.
“Okay, yeah. Cool. I’ll do that.”
I laughed softly and just shook my head. “I’ll talk to you later.” I got into my car and started it, and for the first time in a long time, I felt the surge of accomplishment fill me.
But also something darker… foreboding.
7
Adryan
I was pissed. Fucking enraged. But I sat calmly in the chair in my office, overlooking the crowd below, my hand idly stroking Bear’s big, boxy head. He rested his muzzle on my thigh, every once in a while giving a huff of understanding, a deep exhale as if he felt my anger as well.
It had taken every ounce of self-control not to take Kayla right then and there as I watched her leave her class. I didn't even care that her friend was right there, would’ve watched me throw my mate over my shoulder, bare my fangs, and let her see the flash of red in my eyes.
I didn’t fucking care, wanted to do that so damn badly my mouth was salivating at the very thought of it, but I couldn’t. I hadn’t. Not just yet. I needed to get things in order with the plans being made for the Assembly first. I needed to sort things out with Cian and the Lycans coming into the States to deal with this bullshit.