You'll Never Lose Me (Never 4)

He hisses, but that’s all he does as he backhands her across the face. She stumbles back, but someone stops her from falling. My vision is turning hazy and the edges are turning black. Am I dying or am I already dead?

“Little Hen, I have you,” I’m picked up and held against a warm chest with tree trunks for arms wrapping around me, enclosing me and keeping me safe.

“Burn it to the ground,” he orders and a “no,” slips from my lips.

“She’s lost a lot of blood,” I hear Ivy say as she comes closer and a growl reverberates through the chest I’m pressed against.

“Don’t kill him, don’t deserve it,” it’s all I can get out but I hope he’ll listen, if he’s real that is.

I still think I’m dead and this is nothing but purgatory preparing me for my final resting place, I’m going to hell I know it.

“If you burn it down she’ll lose the last piece of her brother,” comes from Dante, why is his voice the only one I can pinpoint and recognise?

“Restrain him and Finley, let’s see how they like being tied to a chair. I’ll be back to deal with them later. Come on, little Hen, we need to get you to our doctor. God damn fucking Stockholm,” strange funny words, mmm sleep now. I wonder if I’ll ever wake back up?

THREE

TEN DAYS LATER

I’M NOT sure where I am, I’ve been in and out of it a lot lately and it isn’t getting any easier. I’m not in a hospital, this bed is too comfy, and it doesn’t smell as sterile as it should. It’s clean but if I’m not in a hospital then where am I? That isn’t the right question though, is it? why do I ask myself questions? I’m crazy. My inner voice is a genius though, because the question I should be asking is why am I here? Shouldn’t I be dead?

“Little Hen,” that nickname does nothing more than bring tears to my eyes and they are falling instantly. How is he here?

My throat is dry and scratchy and he’s quickly at my side with a glass of water. This cannot be

real and what the fuck happened to Dante and Fin if it is.

“It’s okay, you’re okay,” he says, brushing the hair away from my face and sets the glass back on my bedside table.

“Where am I?” I ask, the water has helped but my head is pounding like a drum and I don’t want to risk making it worse by talking loudly.

“You’re at... lets just say my place. You’re safe here, they won’t hurt you again. It is all taken care of,” his words are supposed to settle me, I think, but they are having the opposite effect.

“What did you do?” I don’t need a scratchy throat to make my words sound harsh, my tone, and I’m sure the flames shooting from my eyes have that covered all by themselves.

“Hey, take it easy, little sister. He’s still alive if that’s what you’re thinking, but it’s only because you asked me to keep it that way. This has a time limit though, he will get what is coming to him, he deserves that and so much more,” he’s getting angry I can tell by the veins throbbing in his skull and snaking over his arms.

“I want to see him, I don’t care about Finley but please Devy do not kill anyone. I can’t bear to have anymore deaths in my life, our brothers were more than enough,” I can’t look at him as I say this, it’s too hard. My head is leaning against the pillow with my eyes squeezed shut.

“I cannot make you that promise, but there are a lot of ways to make them pay that will let them keep their miserable lives. Look, I don’t know why you want to see him but I won’t refuse you. You will not be alone with him though, I will not be swayed from this decision,” his fingers glide across my cheek and I can’t help but flinch away, I don’t want to be touched by anyone.

“Can I choose who will be in there with me?” It chokes out of me as I open my eyes and try to bring myself to meet his. Why can’t I do this?

“Who do you want little Hen?” His tone is gentle, and it doesn’t seem possible that he can sound this way, he shouldn’t be able to be soft and gentle.

“Noah or H, no one else,” I say, before rolling onto my side and saying goodbye to him without the use of words.

TWO MORE DAYS and he’s back in my room, I didn’t think I’d want to be alone after my time in the basement but it’s the opposite. The thought of being around anyone fills me with dread and the reprieve has been nothing more than heaven sent. His entire being fills the doorframe and I cannot see past him. Is he alone or has someone joined him this time?

My heart is beating erratically within my chest, it feels tight and it is hard to catch my breath. The thought that someone could be behind him is terrifying, I hate this person that I am becoming.

“Are you alone?” My voice is shaking like a leaf, as is the rest of me. Please be alone Devy, I don't know what I’ll do otherwise.

“No little sister, I have Noah with me,” he sounds angry as he says that name, what is his problem with Noah, he’s amazing.

“I can’t, please Devy,” great and now I’m begging along with the quivering, I feel so pathetic.

“Leighbear,” oh that voice, it's like a balm to my nerves, but it only soothes the edges; it can’t reach the damage that is running through me.