“No, please, don’t apologize,” she said. “I think that it is amazing that you are here, putting yourself out there for the sake of your child. You seem like a wonderful mother. And to be honest, Lily is one of the cutest babies I have ever seen. I’m sure that her father will be more than happy to embrace her as his own. Love between two people can often be complicated and messy, but your love for your children is never that harsh. The love for a child is open and free, and it is very rare that a man or a woman has to fight to feel that way about a child, even if that child is already born before finding out. I think that your daughter’s father is going to jump for joy, maybe not initially, but once he meets her, he won’t be able to stop himself.”
“Well, I hope so,” I said, smiling.
“In the meantime,” she said, smiling at Lily. “I am going to take very good care of that beautiful baby. I can give her some fun tummy time and turn on Baby Einstein and get her little brain moving and developing. Don’t worry. I promise that Lily is in excellent hands.”
I smiled and walked back over to the desk where I filled out a ton of paperwork and then kissed Lily gently on the face. I handed her over to Mrs. Mouser and stood there for a moment, not wanting to leave her at all. Sensing my reluctance to leave, the sitter walked over and put her hand on my shoulder.
“It’s okay.” She smiled. “You go now and get ready for tonight. It is quickly approaching.”
I smiled and shook my head, knowing that she was right. The hardest part was the fact that I was struggling to walk away. Once I was away from the room, I started to feel more comfortable and more at ease than I had moments before. I took the elevator back up to my room and took my dress off of t
he hanger. I showered and changed, looking at myself in the mirror in awe. Ever since my sixth month of pregnancy, I had been living in yoga pants and sweatshirts, but seeing myself standing there with my long, black, velvet dress cascading over my hips, my confidence started to show again.
Before I could lose that confidence, I turned and grabbed my bag and faux-fur shawl that I had brought to stay warm. I smiled kindly at the other guests passing me in the hall and made my way down to the lobby. I stood there on the marble floors for a moment and wasn’t quite sure where to start. I glanced over into the lounge, and Brian was there, pouring a row of shots. I clutched my purse tightly to my chest and walked into the lounge, smiling as Brian lit up. He walked around the bar and hugged me tightly.
“You look amazing,” he whispered. “I’m so glad you came.”
“Have you seen Cameron?”
“Actually, yes,” he said. “He just walked outside about two minutes ago.”
“Thanks,” I replied, picking up the bottom of my dress and racing for the door.
Carefully, I walked to the right, stepping inside the large footprints leading around to the courtyard. As I rounded the corner, I stopped, staring over at Cameron sitting comfortably on the bench. He was alone, and that alone made my heart skip a beat. Now, I just needed to make it through the hard part.
Chapter 27
New Year’s Eve
Cameron
I had put my tux on, even though I didn’t have a date to impress, and walked down to the lounge to get a drink. The crowd was already in the ballroom, but I didn’t feel like being surrounded by all of those people. I did a quick sweep of the room to make sure Bea wasn’t in there and then headed outside, figuring if she was going to find me anywhere, it was going to be where we first kissed.
I walked across the path, leaving large footprints in my wake. I sat down on the covered bench and stared out at the snow-covered slopes, lit up with bright colors. There was still twenty minutes until the countdown, but I had exhausted my anxiety, and I knew the best thing for me to do was to sit in one place and hope that if she came, Bea would find me. As I stared out at all the partygoers, my heart was starting to sink, feeling like I was destined for a night alone. However, as the thoughts passed through my mind, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I closed my eyes for a moment and smiled, making sure it was not just another dream.
Slowly, I turned in my seat and looked up at Bea, standing in the snow. She stepped back and placed her hands in front of her, her cheeks red from the cold. She looked absolutely stunning, and I felt like the words that I wanted to say were stuck in my throat. Her long, black, velvet gown moved over her hips and down into the snow. Wrapped around her shoulders was a fur shawl with a diamond snowflake pin stuck in the right corner. She grasped her hands tightly together in front of her, and I couldn’t tell if she was cold, nervous, or a bit of both. I looked up into her beautiful green eyes and smiled wide, standing up and taking her hands.
“Bea,” I whispered. “I didn’t think…”
“That I would come?” she finished for me. “I wasn’t sure that you would be here. In fact, I was terrified that I would find myself standing here all alone when the ball dropped. But I couldn’t believe you came. I have something I want to talk to you about. Something that has been in my life and on my mind for the last year.”
“Me too,” I said, taking her hands. “Come here. Sit down next to me.”
She smiled and allowed me to pull her over to the bench. Gracefully, she sat down and turned toward me, something different in her eyes. She looked almost scared to be there talking to me. I reached out and grabbed her arms, pulling her into me.
“Come here,” I said. “I am so happy to see you.”
“I am so happy that you feel that way,” she said.
“How have you been?”
“Busy, to say the least,” she said, smiling. “But I have to admit, a little lost.”
“I know how you feel,” I said, deciding that if I was going to tell her how I felt, it had to be then and there. Otherwise, I feared I would lose my nerve. “I’ve been looking for you.”
“You have?”
“Yes, for the entire last year,” I said. “In fact, when you came to look for me, I saw you, but I didn’t realize it was you until you had already left. We crossed in front of each other without even realizing it.”