How could I have stayed away from her for so long?
Chapter 14
Vanessa
"You are glowing these days," Eva says from her desk in the small office we share.
I had a class in the morning, and she has one in the evening. Today is one of those days we’ve found ourselves in the office at the same time and we've been catching up as we work.
"Don't think I missed the hunk who came to take you for lunch the other day," Eva continues.
I laugh but she's right. Logan is the reason why I'm always smiling. What started as a casual affair has blossomed into something else. In the past two weeks, we’ve grown closer, spending all our free time as a threesome with Ivy.
It feels as if we are a real family and I've caught myself dreaming about us, as one unit. I'd never admitted that to anyone, considering what a short time Logan and I have known each other for.
"He's my landlord and now a friend."
"With benefits?" Eva presses.
"Maybe." I'm too shy to admit outrightly that we are lovers.
"Enjoy yourself," Eva says. "You don't know how much I miss having a man to snuggle up to at night, among other things."
Eva broke up amicably with her boyfriend when the headquarters of the company he worked for moved to Europe. They had both agreed that their love was not strong enough to sustain a long-distance relationship.
"You'll find someone," I console her. "Just make sure he's not married."
"Oh God, yeah," Eva says. "How did that go by the way? Did you get around to telling him that he fathered the most beautiful baby girl in the world?" Eva is one of the three people, now four including Logan, who know the details of what happened with Gabriel.
"No, but I'm planning on telling him soon," I tell her.
"You're a bigger person than I am, Vanessa," she says. "It's the right thing to do if only to ensure that Ivy knows her dad. There's nothing worse than growing up without knowing who your father is then when you do find out, you realize that he has no interest in a relationship with you," Eva says with traces of bitterness in her voice.
I've heard the story before, and I feel for her knowing that she still carries that pain decades later.
Eva lets out a humorless laugh. "Don't pay any attention to me. Any talk about absentee dads always gets me going. "
"Probably the way I feel when I think of Gabriel," I tell her.
"Let's talk about the hunk. Much more enjoyable and I can live vicariously through you," she says.
"There's nothing to say. We're doing something, I just don't know what to call it..." my voice trails off.
"You don't need to define it. Just enjoy the ride," Eva says.
I'm definitely enjoying the ride. I wish my sister would be as chill about it as Eva. We each return to work but talking about Logan has brought him to the forefront of my mind. He's making such an effort with getting comfortable with Ivy and has even given her a bath once. I supervised of course and he was a little nervous, but he did great. Seeing him working so hard to be part of our lives has melted all my defenses.
It's exhilarating and frightening at the same time.
I leave the office at three and drive to Lexi's to pick Ivy up. I tense as I get nearer to my sister's house. I hate that there's this distance between us ever since she came to the house just after Logan and I had come from the shower. It had been awkward, to say the least, and I’d felt as if I’d been caught with my hand in the cookie jar. Which, I guess, I had.
I park the car and stroll up to the front door. Hopefully, I can be in and out in a few minutes.
I knock and Lexi opens the door a minute later. "Ivy is still napping," Lexi says. "Do you want to come in for coffee?"
I actually hoped to go home early and get dinner started. Logan's coming home this evening after a long shift, and I want to surprise him with a nice meal. Any other time, I'd happily tell Lexi that I have plans but now that we're not on good terms, it sounds rude to tell her that.
"Sure," I say and follow her into the house.
"I've missed you," Lexi says when she brings the coffee to the island.
“I’ve missed you too.” I take a sip of my coffee.
“Vanessa, I just care about you, and I don’t want to see you get hurt,” she says.
“I won’t get hurt. Logan is not the person you think he is.” After living in the same house with him for a few weeks, I feel safe with him. He’s not going to hurt me. We’re in this together.