I glance up at him, trying to shrug out of the grip he has on me. Tiberius is inside playing with Vaughn; I know it because I can hear him happily barking and Vaughn returning it with laughter. For the first time in years, Vaughn is genuinely laughing again, and the purity of it slightly swells my deflated heart.
“What your brother just did. Was that his idea or yours?”
“Mine. It was completely, unequivocally my idea. Please don’t punish him for it. Please? I’ll go back into the oubliette. I’ll rot down there happily, but please. He didn’t want to go; I forced him outside.”
I’m damn near hysterical as I pull away from the grip he has on my shoulders. I turn to face him and ball his shirt into my fists, looking up at him with pleading eyes, but he’s more focused on the car.
Waiting for it to disappear from sight.
Waiting for the moment he can strike us down for what we attempted to do.
Waiting for things he’ll never say. Pater won’t waste words when actions can be taken instead, and I’m afraid. Not for myself, but for Vaughn.
Why didn’t he leave?!
I fall against Pater’s chest and begin sobbing. He won’t care; my tears never meant much to him before, and they aren’t even for him. They’re not for myself either; they’re for the innocent inside who will suffer because I tried to help him.
“Let’s go inside,” he says quietly, putting his arm around me and leading me back in. He hasn’t agreed not to hurt the boy, but I hope that somewhere deep down in the void where his soul should be, he’ll take some pity on him and allow me to take the punishment in his place.
Once inside, he firmly closes the door and t
urns both the locks deliberately. He turns the doorknob to make sure it’s locked, before leading me into the living room where Tiberius and Vaughn are still playing.
“Go sit on the floor with your brother,” Pater says, damn near shoving me down next to Vaughn. Tiberius, blissfully unaware of what he might see, comes over and licks my face.
Not now, I think, giving him a gentle shove. He looks at me curiously, before he trots out of the room to explore the rest of the house.
Pater sits down on his couch and puts his face in his hands for a moment, trying to collect his thoughts before he speaks. If a verbal lashing is the worst of what he has to offer, I’ll gladly accept it.
“I know you both hate me, but you also know that I don’t care. I have rules for a reason, and that’s to protect you both. Your brother couldn’t follow the fucking rules, and do you see where that got him? Dead at thirteen years old, when he could have still been here with us. You have had it way too easy, and that’s gonna fucking change, starting now,” he says, dropping his hands and glaring at us.
Easy? This is easy? Being forced to play the dutiful wife to your father; being forced to protect your brothers, and failing where it counts the most?
I don’t dare speak those sentiments out loud. No matter how much I want to stand up and scream my questions at him, I stay seated and move closer to Vaughn. I can feel him trembling when he puts a protective arm around my shoulders, but his attempt to reassure me is such an act of bravery in the face of this evil that I can’t help but feel proud.
I may not have made many good decisions in my life, and I may have gotten a lot of shit wrong, but I know that at the very least, I raised him right.
Pater leans back against the couch and stares at us with his mouth open. He’s just warned us of what’s to come, and yet here we sit in solidarity against a tyrant.
He chuckles as he looks away for a moment. I can see the wheels spinning in his head and I’m ready for whatever it is he decides to put us through next, because I’ll have Vaughn by my side. With as much as I wanted him to gain his freedom, being in his presence makes me feel stronger.
“If only you cared this much about Eloy. Maybe then he’d still be alive, too,” Pater says to me with a smirk. He’s trying to hurt me, devastate me with his words, and if I still didn’t have one son to care for, I would have felt the blow much harder, just as he intended.
“She did, and that’s why she couldn’t kill him,” Vaughn retorts bravely.
I put a hand on his leg to keep him from talking back to Pater, but he must be working on pure adrenaline because he hops to his feet and balls his fists at his side.
“You’re not as great as you think you are. You can beat us, throw us into the ground, abuse Jocelyn as much as you want; but you’ll never be more than a monster. If you were as great as you act like you are, you wouldn’t do this to us,” he shouts at him.
“Wow. Look at you go!” Pater says in appreciation. “I see your balls finally dropped. Congratulations, kid!”
I don’t know where my sudden bravery comes from. Maybe it’s seeing my younger brother stand up and not give a shit about the consequences of speaking back to Pater, but I get up, stand next to him, and place a hand gently on his shoulder.
“You can leave now. Walk out the front door like I told you to, and don’t look back. He can’t hurt you anymore, Vaughn. You just took control of your life again. It’s okay. I’ll be okay,” I say to him softly.
“I’m not leaving you here with him,” he replies, his eyes still on Pater, who’s watching us with sheer amusement on his face.
“Please let him leave,” I beg, giving Pater my full attention. “I’ll stay for as long as you want me to, and die when you deem it necessary, but he’s been through enough. If you love me as much as you say you do, you’ll let him go.”