His eyes get really big as he pulls back. "What's wrong? What did I do?"
I shake my head, realizing that I made him think something is wrong. "No. I mean, I changed my mind about—you know." I wiggle my eyebrows at him.
He looks at me seriously. "Becca, you're going to have to spell it out for me."
I wrap my hands around the back of his neck and hold on to him. "You remember I told you that I wouldn't have sex with you? I've changed my mind."
He takes three deep breaths and rests his forehead against mine. He looks as if he's a man that is struggling really hard with something. When he pulls back, he looks at me. "I need you to tell me about your ex."
I look at him with indecision. That's the last thing that I want to think about right now, but I know it needs to be done. I release a breath and try to gather my thoughts. "I dated my ex for a month. He told me that he loved me. He took my virginity and immediately got out of bed and left to go on a date with someone else. He told me that the whole month was a lie and the only reason he went out with me was to have sex with a virgin."
Lucas' hold on me tightens, and I see the anger on his face. I shake my head at him. "Don't be mad. It's done. It's over with. I'm over it."
He tilts his head to the side and cups my cheek. "Did you love him?"
I shake my head. "No. I'm 23 years old. I liked him and thought it was time, but no, it's not like he broke my heart or anything like that. I was more angry and embarrassed that I let something like that happen than anything else."
His hold tightens again, and he shakes his head. "This is not your fault. None of that was your fault. He's the asshole."
"I know he is."
He leans toward me. "Is that what you mean when you said that you didn't even like sex?"
I shrug my shoulders. "I didn't. It wasn't good, but he also never made me feel the way that you make me feel."
Lucas lets out a deep breath. "Whether it happens now or a month from now, I'm not going anywhere. I want more than just sex with you."
There's so much that I want to believe. I would love to believe that what he's saying is true, but I'm not going to let my heart or my thoughts go that way. I need to remember what this is. He's my rebound guy. He's going to help me move on. That's what we agreed to, and I'm not going to change the rules in the middle of the game. I'm going to go into this with my eyes wide open. I'm going to have some fun. "I don't want to wait a month. I don't want a week. Heck, I don't even want to wait another second, Lucas. I want you."
He pulls out of my arms, stands up, and holds his hand out to me. I put my hand in his, and he helps me up from the couch, pulling me toward his bedroom. He doesn't stop until we're right next to his bed. His hands go to my shoulders, and he looks deep into my eyes. "Are you sure about this, Becca?"
I don't even hesitate. I've never been so sure of anything in my life. I stretch up on my tiptoes and press my lips to his. His hands go over my shoulders, down my back, and he cups my ass, pulling me close to him. I can feel his hard bulge press into my belly, and I try to get closer to him.
There's a yearning deep inside of me wanting more, knowing that this time is going to be different. Already, it’s better than I could have ever imagined. "Yes," I whisper huskily as he kisses my neck.
He pulls back, and I can see the strain on his face as if he's trying to hold back from me. He pulls his shirt from the waistband of his pants and throws it across the room. I can't resist his muscular chest, and I put my hands on it before touching every hard muscle on his abdomen. He sucks in a breath as if my touch makes him crazy. He reaches for the hem of my shirt and starts to pull it up. "May I?"
I look him square in the eye. "You can do anything you want with me."
He grunts loudly, "Fuck," and I can't help but smile as I watch him start to lose the self-control that he’s tried really hard to hold on to.
Chapter 11
Lucas
Take your time. That's what I keep repeating in my head over and over and over. I could rush this and bury myself balls deep inside of her in an instant. That's how badly I need and want her. Her words seem to have gone straight to my dick. She doesn't know what it means that she is giving herself to me. I've been ready to take this slowly. I prepared myself for it. But the fact that she is ready—fuck, she isn't just ready. She wants it. She needs it.