20
Doe
“No arguing,” I commanded as soon as the hospital door opened and all three of my brothers walked in, with Aspen leading the way. My gaze was on Jackson, but I pointed to all four of them individually so they knew I was including each of them. “I hear one growl in your voices, and Dad is going to show you the door.”
Bryant and LJ pressed their lips together, fighting a laugh, while Aspen gave me a pout. I barely looked at them before directing my gaze back to the eldest of the golden three. “I mean it, Jackson.”
He leaned over the bed I was propped up in the middle of and kissed the top of my head. “I swear I’ll be on my best behavior.”
“Thank you.” While he was close, I hugged him. “Thanks for coming.”
He squeezed his arms around me. “There is absolutely no other place I would be right now, baby sis.”
The other two shoved him back after a few seconds, wanting their turn. I was practically lifted off the bed by them both as they hugged me hard. “Where are the parentals anyway?” LJ asked when he released me. “And the boyfriend? Where the fuck is he? Why are you all alone in here?”
“Mom and Dad are talking to Dr. Contreras. You know how Dad is, he wants all the details.” I rolled my eyes, but I wasn’t all that annoyed that my father was so concerned about my well-being. He might smother me at times, but I’d never doubted his love for me. “I sent Jenner to check in on Pixie. She seemed really down yesterday when Mom and I left for the evening.”
“It’s crazy that the person you got matched with turned out to be your boy’s sister,” Bryant commented as he leaned against the wall by the door. “I mean, that’s some weird fate shit right there, Doe.”
I smiled. “Yeah, I guess it was just meant to be.”
“Are you nervous?” Jackson asked, moving to stand beside me—and closer to Aspen. “You already have an IV and everything. Are you sure it’s safe?”
“I’m going to be fine,” I promised. “And no, I’m not nervous. At least, not nervous for me.” I was worried for Pixie. This was her last chance…
But I couldn’t think like that. I’d promised myself all week to stay positive. That as long as I kept thinking about Pixie getting better, then when they took my bone marrow, they would also give her a lot more. My strength and love for her as my new sister. The will to keep fighting.
The night before, as Jenner had held me, I’d told him to keep thinking the same thing. So that I could absorb all of his strength, love, and will to fight. I’d felt his silent tears, but I’d also felt everything I’d asked for soaking into my pores. If that alone could save Pixie, then she was going to make a full recovery.
Realistically, I knew that it didn’t work like that, but I refused to let that rot my mind. Pixie was going to get better.
I’d spent the entire week with her. Mom and I would visit her each morning with baskets of goodies. Puzzles, word searches, crosswords, sudoku. Baked goodies that Mom remembered enjoying while undergoing her own chemo treatments, as well as a few things she and I had both researched that would be easy on Pixie’s stomach. When she would take a nap, I’d drive Mom home and then come back with Jenner in the afternoons.
Jenner had been grumpy about me spending so much time at the hospital. He wanted me to rest all week to prepare for my own procedure, but I’d just met his sister. I wanted to get to know her and show her that I was there for her before she found out I was the one giving her the bone marrow.
I was a little nervous about how she was going to take that news. She’d told me she really wanted to meet her donor, and each time, I’d fought with myself about confessing that it was me. But I didn’t want her to feel obligated to like me because of it.
The day before, she’d seemed really depressed, and it had made me worry about her.
“Do you really have to wear that hair net thing?” Aspen asked, motioning to the cap the nurse had given me earlier when I’d changed out of my regular clothes.
“Yes,” I confirmed with a laugh. “But not until they take me into the operating room.”
“Here, at least let me braid your hair.” He nudged my brother out of the way and started playing with my hair.
“Do you even know how to braid?” Jackson asked with a frown.
“I know how to do a lot of things you don’t know about,” Aspen muttered half under his breath.
“Stop manhandling her hair,” my brother growled. “You’re going to pull her bald.”
“No arguing,” I snipped, stopping Jackson before he could even get going. “Go stand in the corner.”
“But—”
“Go.” I pointed to the corner of the room, and he grumbled as he stomped over to where LJ was standing.
My hair was really thick but not nearly as long as my mom’s. Aspen was still working on the braid when the door opened and Jenner walked in. He took two steps into the room and stopped, his eyes narrowing on me and the guy playing with my hair.
“Awkward,” Bryant and LJ said at the same time.
I rolled my eyes at them and held my hand out to Jenner. “How is she?”
He grunted but took my hand in his. “She was all smiles. Your mom took her some muffins earlier. Don’t worry, though. She thinks you had a routine doctor’s appointment. I promised her she would see you later.” He lifted my hand to his lips and kissed my palm. “But only if you’re feeling up to it, little lamb.”
Bryant snickered at the pet name, making me roll my eyes yet again. Jenner straightened his shoulders and slowly turned his head. Whatever my brother saw on my boyfriend’s face stopped his laughter and had him standing up taller, his face filling with instant remorse.
“Sorry, Doe,” he muttered sheepishly.
It took effort to keep my mouth from gaping open in surprise. The only person who could ensure a reaction that effortlessly, that instantaneously, was our dad.
“I don’t care what you say,” Aspen muttered, securing my hair with a band. “That was fucking sexy.”
I elbowed him in the ribs just as I heard Jackson growl something. “Mine,” I hissed at my friend.
“Yes, ma’am,” Aspen said with a chuckle, lifting his hands in surrender. “Don’t worry. He’s definitely not my type.”
“No, your type is—”
Jackson broke off as soon as the door opened and our parents entered the room. The moment the room went quiet, Mom and Dad shared a look. Dad huffed but shook his head, and the two of them pretended like nothing was out of the ordinary. Because, really, it wasn’t. It broke my heart a little more each time that Jackson didn’t come out to them.
Not just for my brother, but our parents too.
They loved him so much, and they weren’t blind. They knew his sexual orientation by this point. What Mom had mentioned to Jenner had more than confirmed that for me. By not telling them, Jackson was essentially showing them that he didn’t trust them with his truest self, and I wasn’t blind to how that hurt not only Mom, but Dad as well.
But it was his choice, one I couldn’t make for or force on him. Which was why I directed everyone’s attention back to why we were all gathered in that private hospital room that felt smaller and smaller by the minute with all the people crowded into it.
“Are they going to kick all of you out? I thought the nurse said only two people in here at a time.”
“Let them try,” Dad said with a grunt.
Mom crossed to the bed. “Who did your hair?” she asked, picking up the end. “It’s cute.”
“It was in my way,” I told her when Aspen didn’t take credit. “Jenner said you took Pixie some breakfast?”
She nodded. “She seems to be in good spirits today. Dr. Contreras told her that he was getting ready to do the donor’s procedure, and she asked him if you had decided if she could meet you or not. Contreras gave me a weird look but didn’t give away your secret. He promised her he would ask you again beforehand.”
I took hold of her hand, squeezing both her fingers as well as Jenner’s reassuringly. “I’m going to go see her as soon as the doctor says I can get out of bed afterward. Until then, keep her distracted as much as possible.”
“As soon as they take you to the OR, I’ll go and sit with her,” Mom promised. “You just stay focused on what you need to do and stay strong.”
The brisk knock on the door was followed by two nurses walking through the door. “Whoa,” the male nurse said when he saw everyone standing around. I could tell he wanted to say something about the number of people, but he smartly kept his mouth shut. “We’re here for Miss Niall.”
Everyone jumped into action. Aspen and my brothers all hugged me before Dad and Mom did the same. Jenner gripped my hand the entire time, refusing to move aside, even when Jackson nudged him. Once the others were out of the way, Jenner bent to kiss me.
Lifting his head, he cupped my cheek. For a long moment, he just skimmed his eyes over my face. “I love you.”
“I love you.” I covered his hand when I saw the glimmer of tears in his eyes. That was one of the things I loved so much about him. He was this big, strong guy, but he wasn’t afraid to let me see his emotions. “Don’t worry. I’ve got this.”
A few of his tears spilled over his lashes as he kissed me again, just a tender brush of his lips over mine. “I’ll be here when you get out of recovery.”