“But Natalie and Harper are in there with Emmie and Layla,” Jenna argued. “What do you need us for?”
Lana rolled her honey-brown eyes. “Like anyone but Harper is actually doing any work. Those other three are knee-deep in discussing the wedding.”
Jenna shot me a look over my sister’s head as the hunger I had been feeling only seconds before completely disappeared. My stomach gave a sharp cramp, and I wonder just how quickly a bleeding ulcer could form. But the pain of the cram
p did what nothing else could right then. It grounded me, and I lowered my eyes from Jenna, not wanting her to see how fucked up I really was.
I dug my heels in outside the kitchen door, forcing Lana to stop. She turned to face me with lifted brows. Her eyes scanned my face and instantly darkened with concern at whatever she saw there. “What’s wrong? You look a little green.” She lowered her voice. “You’re not pregnant, are you? Are you having morning sickness?”
“Of course I’m not,” I nearly shouted, then quickly lowered my voice when Jenna snickered.
“Then what’s the problem?”
“I…” But the words wouldn’t come. I looked helplessly at Jenna.
“She’s about ten seconds from popping a stomach wall with the stress she’s under, and she’s trying to tell you she isn’t up for going into your kitchen to face more of that shit,” Jenna deadpanned, but Lana’s beautiful face turned dark.
“Lucy…is that true?” Still unable to find my voice, all I could do was shrug. “Is this what you and Drake have been talking about when you call him?” Again, I shrugged. I had told Drake some of what was going on, but I hadn’t told a soul about the argument with Mom. And Drake had kept quiet about what I told him because I was like one of his daughters to him. My confidence was sacred to him. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“If she’s not telling Harris, did you expect her to tell you?” Jenna reasoned.
“Yes, actually, I did,” my sister muttered. “Okay, tell me now. How bad is it?”
Once again, l looked to Jenna for help. Why the hell wouldn’t my voice work?
“Well, that small and intimate wedding she wants is now a three-ring circus with everything except the dancing bears. Last I heard, the guest list was over five hundred and still hasn’t been finalized.”
Jenna wasn’t even exaggerating. This damn thing was turning into a circus with Aunt Emmie as the lion tamer. Only, I couldn’t decide if Nat and Mom were trapeze artists…or clowns.
I instantly felt ashamed for thinking that last thought. My mom wasn’t a clown, even if I did think she and Nat were ridiculous at times.
“Lucy, look at me.” On reflex, I instantly gave her my eyes. She stepped closer and lowered her voice, but I had never heard it sound fiercer. “Why the hell haven’t you spoken up? This is your wedding, and you’re letting them take it over. They are getting absurd with this shit, and you’re just sitting back and taking it.” She cupped my elbows and shook me ever so slightly, but it was enough to get her point across and force me to give her all of my attention. “You are stronger than this, Lucy.”
My levee took a critical hit, but oddly enough, remained intact. My chin trembled, but I quickly clenched my jaw. “No, Lana. I’m nowhere near as strong as you think I am,” I got out in a choked voice. “You have no idea just how weak I really am.”
“Baby, don’t say that,” she whispered forcefully. “Look, it doesn’t even matter if you’re strong enough or not—though I know the truth. You have people around you who would kill for you. Who only want you to be happy. Say one little word, and those people would slay a dragon for you. You don’t have to be strong all the time, because you have people who care so much about you that they will be the strong ones for you.”
“A dragon,” Jenna snorted. “Yeah, that pretty much describes all those crazy-ass bitches right now.”
Lana’s lips twitched with the beginnings of a smirk, but she quickly blanked her expression again. “This is not the way to start a marriage, Lucy. If you can’t tell Harris something like this, then there are always going to be things you keep from him. And while I know you’re only trying to protect him, ask yourself how you would feel if the roles were reversed. What if he was keeping something from you that was bothering him this much?”
My thoughts instantly turned to Kin. Watching what she was going through with Jace because he was keeping something from her, how broken she was right now… I wouldn’t have been strong enough to handle that. My sister was right. I couldn’t keep doing this.
My marriage was too important to keep secrets, even if they were to protect the man I loved.
Chapter 9
Harris
I felt like I couldn’t eat another bite, but at the same time, contemplated asking Lana for a few slices of her pies to take home later. Football was on, and I was struggling not to fall asleep, while around me, a few of the other men had lost the battle. Nik and Cole were snoring even as I fought back a yawn of my own.
A glance at my phone told me Lucy had been in the kitchen with the other women for a few hours now. After dinner, they had conned her into helping with dishes, when I would have rather she snuggled with me on the couch. I couldn’t sleep without her beside me, even if it was to take a nap on her sister’s couch.
Standing, I left my dad and Jesse to fight their own battles with sleep and headed for the kitchen. As much as I loved spending the day with our families, I was ready to go home. I wanted to fall into bed with Lucy, sleep for a few hours, get up and have some pumpkin pie, and then make love to her all night long.
As I walked, still half asleep, I could hear raised voices coming from the kitchen. Shit, what the hell were they arguing about now? Knowing those crazy-ass ladies, it could have been over anything. It wasn’t until I was nearly to the door that what they were saying registered. The drugged feeling from all the turkey I had eaten earlier disappeared, and I was wide awake now.
“How the fuck did you let this wedding get so crazy?” Lana sounded pissed, and at the mention of the wedding, I stopped in my tracks with my hand raised to push the door open.