Yet he was sure no one else would have the least suspicion and her composure, the way she was acting the part of loved-up, happy regal bride, made him feel edgy himself. This was too reminiscent of his own parents’ marriage, every public show of affection an act. The idea that his touch now made her uncomfortable was one that caused a cold hand to grip his insides.
Then finally it was time for the bride and groom to leave. Gabi was whisked away by Imogen and Tia to change into her going-away outfit, a simple off-white trouser suit cinched at the waist with a glittering belt, her shoulders covered with a faux-fur shrug. Cesar received a clap on the shoulder from Antonio, a hug from Luca.
‘Look after her,’ his new brother-in-law murmured.
More hugs from Imogen and Tia; his parents wished them well with cool hauteur, but at least accompanied by smiles.
The car journey back to Aguilarez, achieved in stilted silence, was laden with a sense of foreboding. Sadness touched Cesar along with trepidation—this was not how it was supposed to be. The day had started with such beauty and happiness—he would never forget the sight of Gabriella headed towards him down the aisle, stunning in her radiance.
Now he could see pain and tiredness etched on her face and all he wanted to do was make it go away. He reassured himself that it was all a misunderstanding that could be sorted out with a few words. After all, what could Amelia have said to cause this utter change in Gabi?
Once Roberto drove up to the palace door, they alighted. Cesar had planned to carry his bride across the threshold, could see now that such a move would be rebuffed.
Instead he led her into the lounge.
‘I’ll get a fire going.’
Gabi shrugged and went and sat down, chose a single armchair, perched on the end, her hands clasped together.
‘We need to talk,’ he said.
‘Yes,’ she agreed, her voice colourless, cold, so unlike her usual tones fear gripped him again.
‘I am assuming Amelia said something.’ He frowned. ‘What I don’t understand is why you seem to have already condemned me. Without giving me a chance to explain.’
Gabi’s laugh contained no mirth. ‘So you can try to cast an illusory word web, spin a diplomatic codicil to our marriage agreement, a waiver, a...’
‘That isn’t fair.’
A shrug of her slim shoulders and then, ‘OK. You’re right. I suppose I should have fact-checked. Why did you split up with Lady Amelia when you did?’
The question froze him in his tracks; his brain jumping ahead, he saw the train headed down the tracks. ‘It was time to end the relationship.’
‘Don’t play word games with me, please.’ Now her voice cracked slightly, but her eyes met his, the challenge clear. ‘Did you split up with her so you would be free to marry me?’
Think. But his brain refused; he knew he couldn’t lie to her, knew he didn’t want to. ‘Yes.’
‘Did you love her? Did she love you?’
‘I can’t answer for Amelia but I don’t believe she really did love me, regardless of what she might have said. I didn’t love her.’ Surely she could hear the truth in his voice. But she couldn’t—he could see the doubts converge in her expressive eyes, in the clench of the nails into her palms. ‘Did Amelia tell you I loved her?’ Dammit—he should have closed Amelia down better during the break-up conversation, had been too worried about further scandal and hadn’t foreseen this.
‘But you would say that, wouldn’t you?’ she said softly. ‘You could hardly tell me, the woman you wanted to marry for political reasons, that you are in love with someone else. And you wouldn’t admit it now. Because you wouldn’t want to hurt me and you want to make the best of the situation.’
Somehow he had to make her see that this was not how she thought it was, but for once words wouldn’t come, his brain fuzzed by panic, by the sear of guilt that he had hurt her, by the idea his marriage was already falling apart. ‘I did not love Amelia.’ She had to believe him. ‘I had no wish to marry her. I had no wish to marry anyone.’ Oh, God. That had come out wrong as well. ‘Except you.’
‘For duty. Because your parents told you to. For the sake of our countries.’ Her voice was dull.
Try again.
‘You knew this marriage was not about love, but about forging an alliance.’
She nodded. ‘I did know that our marriage was based around duty but I also believed you were truly free, that your break-up with Amelia was nothing to do with me. If I had known the truth, I wouldn’t have married you.’
And now he could taste the ash of bitterness in his mouth and still he couldn’t find the right words to protest, to reassure, to tell her she had this all wrong. Because words had deserted him as emotions roiled.
Now he saw a tear glisten in the corner of her eye, saw her impatient swipe to get rid of it. ‘I’m not sure I can be second choice. Again. For the rest of my life.’
‘That’s not how it is.’