“Joshua we hardly use to sleep apart before.”
“I know, but somehow this feels different, way different.”
“We’ll be fine, now let’s go before they think something’s wrong and haul me back in there.”
On the ride home I kept looking at her to make sure she was okay, I kept one hand on her knee, she was still so slender, but she’d gained two pounds and if she kept it up she should be back to normal in a couple of weeks.
I realized what was wrong with me when we pulled up to her father’s house.
I was scared as fuck, what if something happened when I wasn’t there, what if she forgot to eat, who was going to mash up her carrots and play airplane and make her laugh so they weren’t so yucky anymore?
I can’t do this, I held onto the steering wheel so tight my fist turned white.
“Babe, you okay?”
I could only nod my head, but I was far from okay, I think I was having a panic attack, my heart was racing, and my palms grew sweaty.
The Captain knocked on my window, when I rolled it down he just stared at me for a while before nodding his head and with a ‘see you guys inside’ he walked away.
I wonder what the fuck that was about.
“You ready sweetheart?”
“Yep, soon as you are.”
I walked around and picked her up out of her seat, I think this was my new favorite thing, toting her around, even after she was all better I think I will still do it.
Her arms around my neck felt good, everything about us felt good for a change; maybe I was afraid it would all end now that she was home and out of danger, maybe I was worried that we’ll fall back into the same routine again.
Well Joshua, you’ll just have to use your genius brain to make sure that didn’t happen.
Inside, the house was decorated with welcome home banners and flowers, mom and Vanessa had gone crazy, there was food and drink, and presents of all things.
“Ooh gifts, I likey.”
I guess they knew my girl after all.
I put her down on the couch and stood over her like a sentinel. Get a grip Steele.
“Welcome home Carrie.”
They came out of the kitchen, dad and the Captain had their heads together about something, Vanessa was a little tentative but mom was her usual effusive self, Matt had a huge chicken leg in one hand and a can of soda in the other.
When he spoke it sounded like growls and grunts, we all just laughed and that broke the ice.
I would have to talk to her later about my siblings and my family’s tradition of standing together; she would have no way of knowing about things like that coming from a place of neglect. I’d also have to convince her that although my family had stood with me, they’d spent every waking moment fighting for her cause.
It’s probably the first time that I can recall where they’d been just as mad at me as they were at the other person, if not more.
She was now a part of that so hopefully one day she would understand.
Matt had left his blonde headed she devil somewhere per my request; I still had to deal with her ass for some of the shit she’d pulled when lamb and I were on the outs. I’d let a lot of shit slide before but that shit was dead.
Her calling Josie and telling her my baby was dying so she should make her move that was beyond inhumane, the fact that Matt was the one who relayed that ghastly bit of information spoke volumes.
It was time to clean house.
Chapter 29
Josh
I watched her as people came in and out all day to see how she was doing, mostly her father’s deputies whom I didn’t know she even knew and wasn’t too sure about, of course I sat next to her throughout these visits, one of her hands always held in mine.
There were some elderly people from the neighborhood as well and I could tell she was as surprised by the first group as the last, it was good that others showed such care for her, especially at a time like this, I didn’t begrudge that, as long as the men kept their distance.
She still tired easily so I took her upstairs after a few hours, which made her chuckle for some unknown reason.
“What’s the joke babes?”
She sniggered as I pulled the covers up over her legs, it wasn’t exactly freezing, but it wasn’t that warm either, I didn’t want her catching cold along with everything else.
“You’re so transparent Steele.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m not even a little bit sleepy, but you’re putting me to bed, yeah right.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
I ignored her and got one of her dog eared classics and started reading at the page she’d left marked.