‘My…next gesture?’
OhpleaseGodletmehavegottenthatonerightpleasepleaseplease!
‘Yes! That delicate snap of the fan that told me you wanted to speak with me-’
Ohnononononononooooo!
‘-and then, the final sign.’ He closed his eyes in rapture, and a shudder went through him. ‘The final signal that made it clear to me that you wished to know me as more than just a friend. Placing your fan onto your lips like that - asking me to kiss you.’
What?
‘But please, rest assured,’ he added hurriedly, seeing the horrified expression on my face. ‘I am not a man to take advantage of young ladies. I will not kiss you until we are engaged to be married.’
‘Thanks,’ I croaked. ‘You have no idea how relieved I am to hear that.’
‘Oh, I can imagine.’ Gently, he reached out and placed his hand over mine. ‘A gentle young lady such as yourself, a delicate flower, must not be mistreated. Please rest assured that when we are married, I will always purport myself with the utmost propriety.’
‘Wonderful. That sounds just…wonderful.’
‘May I ask you to accompany me out onto the terrace, Miss Linton? I would like to have a talk with you in private.’
I was so dazed by the shock I had received, and so desperately in need of fresh air, that I let myself be led outside before I realised why exactly he probably wanted to ‘have a talk with me’.
Oh God! No!
The terrace doors closed behind us. They were pretty, glittering glass doors - but to me, they looked an awful lot like the gates of hell.
‘Miss Lillian Linton.’ Mr Fitzgerald turned to me with an earnest, adoring expression on his face. It made me feel woozy. ‘I know we have only known each other for quite a short time - ’
‘One day, to be exact.’
‘Yes. As I said, quite a short time. But…do you believe in love at first sight?’
‘No. Not really,’
‘Oh.’ He blinked. It was obvious he had been hoping for a different answer, and I had messed up his script.
‘Um…well, I do. And when I first saw you at your aunt’s breakfast table, you took my breath away!’
‘That probably was the garlic Leadfield, the butler, serves with the boiled potatoes. It can have that effect.’
‘No!’ The little man took a step forward, his round face glowing with adoration. ‘It was you! Your feminine grace-’
What?
‘-your beauty, your kindness, your angelic aura-’
Was this fellow on opium?
‘-it all convinced me instantly that there was not, that there could never be, any other woman in the world for me!’
‘Um…are you sure you have looked everywhere? The world is pretty big, you know.’
‘Yes!’ Stepping forward, he grasped my hands and, before I could wrench them from his grasp, lifted them to his lips and kissed them.
Eww!
He was still holding my hands in his. I tugged at them, but he didn’t get the hint.