“I… what are you talking about?”
“What, you want more than three sentences now?”
“Drew,” I hissed, so annoyed it felt like I might actually explode.
“Fine, I got you. Hold on.”
I breathed easy – easier, at least – as he leaned back and away from me to slide his phone out of his pocket. Of course, I was back to wild-eyed and bewildered once I finished skimming the tabloid story he flashed me on his screen.
“What is this?” I breathed.
“That was my reaction too. I mean Drew Maddox doesn’t grovel.”
“And I don’t date men who refer to themselves in third person.”
“True. You date the Matts of the world.”
“Mike.”
“Whatever. The point is, this story is bullshit but we can use it to our advantage.”
“No, we can use it to your advantage,” I corrected as Drew leaned close again. But this time, I kept my cool. “You’re the only one who stands to benefit from something as ridiculous as this. I mean, exactly what good does it do me to pretend to date you?”
“You just said it yourself. You have no money and you’re about to commute four hours a day into the city. You took a job there, probably because you thought you were going to move there, but now you’re living two hours from there all alone because Matt dumped you and took your new lease all for himself. Tell me I’m wrong.”
“His name is Mike.”
“Don’t care. Am I wrong about the rest?”
I breathed hard through my nose.
No. Not at all, I conceded in my head. But my tongue refused to give Drew the pleasure.
“Yeah, I’ll take your silence as a no,” he went on briskly. “Anyway, on top of all the benefits I already listed, you’d be living at my penthouse in the city. We’ll start you at a hotel while we adjust to each other, but move-in should happen within a week or so. Aside from the gifts and meals I’ll be publicly buying you, you’ll have a salary and per diem that you can discuss with my agent. I’m at the clubhouse nine hours a day, if I’m even home. Otherwise, I’m on the road, which means you’re free to do your own thing ninety percent of the time. My driver can take you to and from your work meetings, or you can take the subway just to spite me – I don’t care. As long as you act like you’re in love with me while we’re out together, I won’t give two shits about what else you do with your time. Sound good to you or what?”
I simply stared. I was still going back and forth between being reactive and needing a second to even process all this.
“Also, speaking of your little shitstain ex, this would be a damned good way of getting back at him.”
“How?” I squinted. “Being engaged to you would make him think less of me.”
“No, being engaged to me would make him feel like he let go of the best thing he’s ever had. Nothing gets a man’s attention like his ex dating Drew Maddox.”
“Do you do this a lot? Referring to yourself in third person?”
“It was fitting for that sentence. Want to keep deflecting from the point because you’re realizing how tempted you are to say yes?”
I glowered.
“Don’t you think Mike would see a ring on my finger and think, ‘Well, damn. There goes my chance’?”
“No. I think he’d feel a sense of urgency and try to get you back. He’s had you for longer, he’s going to be naturally possessive, and he’s also going to think that if Drew Maddox wants to wife it, then so should he.”
“Can you not refer to me as ‘it’ or you as ‘Drew Maddox’ ever again?”
“Yes. But I need your answer on this already, because I can’t sit here anymore. The Botox brigade is staring at me like they want to fucking eat me.”
I chewed on my thumbnail as I stared out into space, listing all the pros and cons in my head just for shits and giggles.