The floor was spinning. My whole world was as I made my dizzy way to the elevator, my skin cold, disgust and panic rising in my throat, threatening to suffocate me. I had slept with this remorseless monster. I had let him into the parts of my life that I told no one about. My trust was elusive and yet I’d just handed it over to him. Shame on you, I berated myself as I got into the elevator, jabbing my finger at the buttons and shaking violently the whole way down.

Once I was out, I walked on shaky legs to the exit, trying to blend in by furiously wiping at the mascara that streamed down my face. I tried to disappear among the regular guests, so full of smiles and laughter, completely oblivious to what took place on the highest floors of the hotel. But I gasped when I peered over my shoulder to see Nate rigid, stalking me six guests back. My heart hammered as I turned sharply into the women’s bathroom, locking myself inside a stall. I must’ve stayed there for thirty minutes. A couple women giggled, making jokes on their ways out. I listened for their voices when they got back out into the lobby – for the sound of squealing or gasping or any sort of reaction that would indicate that Nate or Abram was there. But there was none, so I finally let myself leave.

I’d barely pushed open the door when Abram grabbed me.

chapter nineteen

“There are some things about me that you need to understand.”

I sat at the end of his bed, swaying in fear and disbelief as I watched him lock the door. He had said nothing the entire way up to the penthouse, his hand on my mouth until we got into the elevator – the same one he’d had me pushed up against, his hand in my skirt and his fingers inside me. That was maybe two hours ago – two hours but a thousand worlds ago, when I’d been angry with Abram for touching another girl. The one who now bled downstairs, duct tape strapping her doll-like ankles to the legs of her chair.

I kept blinking hard to wake up but it was no nightmare. I couldn’t believe what was going on. Nor could I think of anything Abram could say to justify the side of him I’d seen downstairs. But then he started with two names that put a chokehold on my attention.

“You lost Elle last year. I lost someone by the name of Gavin Theroux.”

What the fuck.

I knew Gavin Theroux. Not personally, but I admired him as every teacher in New York did. The most beautiful school libraries in the city were built by him. He funded enormous scholarships and my students wrote thank you cards to him every year. I’d helped them spell his last name. I was no longer teaching by the time he died but I had coworkers mention it in emails, about the tragedy and how the Theroux family chose to hold a private funeral but thanked the hundreds of teachers and school board officials who wanted to attend. They disclosed few details of his mysterious death, which was unlike them. They were usually open with the public, down-to-Earth and famously honest. Despite having some of the oldest money in Manhattan, Gavin and his parents worked in education – he at a public high school, his parents at city universities.

I knew all about Gavin Theroux, and I knew he was an only child. I looked to Abram accusingly. “I thought you said you lost your brother.”

“I have no biological siblings. My father was the driver to the Theroux family. They let me stay at their townhouse while my parents worked. I grew up with Gavin and his cousin, Nate.”

I swallowed as Abram sat on the chest at the foot of his bed. I pulled my hand away when he reached for it. I could feel myself thawing but I didn’t want to. “You said he didn’t pass. What did you mean?”

Abram leaned forward, torment shadowing his face. “That he was kidnapped and tortured for three days before Jesse Toro slit his throat.”

A chill cased my whole body. “What are you talking about,” I breathed. “Gavin Theroux was a teacher, he was a good man, he had nothing to do with – ”

“I know.” Abram shut me up with a severe look. “He was a teacher and the best man I knew, and he had nothing to do with this world but he had everything to do with me. That was Gavin’s only downfall. Me. I had something the Toro Family wanted and I wouldn’t give it up.”

“What was it?”

“My business. The gambling ring. I started it before opening the Monarch, hosted nights at other hotels. But the security wasn’t good enough at other spots. I had Dante Toro out for me because I wouldn’t give him a cut of my profits, wouldn’t accept his offer to become partners. He tried starting his own ring but I still had the biggest high rollers and the best fighters. I had the better business and he hated it.”

I blinked hard. “He killed Gavin because he wanted your business?” I didn’t understand. Torturing and killing an innocent man out of envy for his friend’s business didn’t seem like punishment that fit the crime.

Abram’s back was rigid as he stared down at his folded hands. “No. I killed his men first.”

Cold dread twisted inside me. “Why?”

“They came for me after one of our biggest nights.” I could see Abram reliving it all, the memories dimming his eyes. “Dante told his men, his friends, anyone who worked for them that my business was off limits. No stepping foot in the Monarch, no matter how big the pot, no matter who was fighting. But Dante’s other son, Stefan – maybe he got in an argument with his fiancée, but she came with two friends to the Monarch on our biggest fight night to date. Had the time of her life, stayed till closing, wound up cheating on Stefan. Couple high school kids found her dead in the street the next morning and around the same time, Toro sent four men to kill me.” His forearms flexed as he closed his palm around his fist. My eyes traveled across every muscle and ridge on his tensed body.

“What did you do them?”

Abram turned to me with a dark look and suddenly I didn’t need his answer. I wasn’t sure why I’d even asked. He was here, alive, and I’d already seen what he could to do people. “So for that they killed Gavin,” I murmured.

He nodded. “They couldn’t get me so they went after the one person I loved and filmed every second of pain they inflicted on him. For me to see.” His blue eyes burned into mine, soaking in the pure horror and pain I felt for him. “So in case you’re wondering how I could possibly hurt people the way I do, it’s because Jesse Toro kidnapped the only person I knew with only love and kindness in his heart, and he mutilated him for three days straight, before having him bleed out on a bathroom floor.”

I shivered through my angry, mournful tears. “I’m so sorry,” I cried, my heart aching for Abram. For Gavin and the Theroux family. They were too purely good. They didn’t deserve to know this kind of misery and ugliness.

“Jesse Toro’s been on the run since Gavin died. Dante sold him out to me the next day. When I had a gun in his mouth.” Abram’s fists shook as he muttered the name. Jesse Toro. “He didn’t even come back when Dante got sick. He knew he’d stand no chance in the States. I’d have him within days. But overseas, he manages to stay a half step ahead all the time. I’ve tracked him for a year but I’m done now. I’m going to have him come to me.”

“How?”

“By killing his brother.”

My hands covered my mouth as Abram explained it. The man I’d seen in the alley was Stefan Toro. He was the prince of the Toro Family – the spoiled party boy who spent his nights clubbing, drinking, posting to Instagram. But he had blood on his hands, too. He and his friends had been the ones to swing a pipe at Gavin’s head and throw him into their car. He had played an important role in the murder and for that reason, Abram didn’t hesitate to use him as human bait. Stefan’s death would lure out Jesse Toro from hiding. Dante w

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