“Tell us how you really feel.” Avery grins.
“I want to make sure that woman knows he’s off-limits.”
“So, like I said, you’re jealous.”
I pause my ranting and frown.
“There’s nothing wrong with being jealous, London. It doesn’t make you a bad person. It just means you have strong feelings for this guy. And it seems pretty mutual,” Avery assures me.
“Is this how you felt about Declan and all of the women he brought home? I would have lost my damn mind. Or at the very least torched their shoes.”
That makes Avery laugh. “I didn’t love Declan bringing home all of those women, but we were both lying to ourselves about how we felt. And neither of us were in a place mentally or emotionally to make it work, so it’s a lot different. But yeah, there were times I wanted to scratch a woman’s eyes out. But mostly I was glad that none of them stuck around long enough for Declan to get attached.”
“I don’t get how you managed to stay just friends for so long. Every time I’m in the same room as Jackson, I want to tear his clothes off. The two months of being business associates was pretty much torture, and now that I know what he’s like in bed…” I sigh. “It’s like there’s this constant … ache for him?”
Avery smiles and so does Harley, but she looks a little wistful.
“Oh yeah, that’s normal. At least that’s how Declan and I are. It was so much more intense at the beginning when we started sleeping together, because, well … we were exploring this new side to our relationship, and we’d spent a lot of years forcing each other into the friend zone even though the feelings were there already. When we finally gave in to them, we were ravenous for each other. Like you can never really get enough.”
“Yes! That’s it exactly! I can’t get enough of him. Every time we go out for dinner, I want to rush through the meal so we can get back to his place and into bed.” Just thinking about it makes my body warm. “When I’m not with him, I’m thinking about being with him, and I would gladly forgo sleep in order to get more time with him.”
Avery nods knowingly. “It sounds like you’re falling for him.”
And I realize, in this moment, that she’s right.
That’s why my heart pounds when he calls or messages. Why my stomach flutters every time he calls me beautiful. Why I crave him so desperately.
What’s even more startling is the knowledge that based on how intensely I feel for him, this is the very first time I’ve ever been truly, hopelessly in love with someone.
It’s as elating as it is terrifying.
21
THE BITTER CRACKLE OF TRUTH
LONDON
“I’m sorry I couldn’t come get you, but I promise as soon as you land, I’m all yours for the next twenty-four hours.” Jackson’s voice holds both apology and excitement.
“You don’t need to be sorry about not wasting an entire day on a plane so I don’t have to fly alone.” I think it’s sweet and slightly ludicrous that he would have even considered doing that in the first place.
“Time spent with you is anything but a waste, London. I’ll meet you at the airport at noon, then I have big plans for you.”
If I wasn’t in the back seat of a car on the way to the airport, I would most definitely ask if those plans entail being naked and horizontal, but since I’m not alone, I bite my tongue. “I can’t wait.”
“Me either. I’ve missed you this week. I’m clearing my schedule in New York so I can spend a week in Colorado.”
“I can’t wait for that either.”
Jackson blows out a breath. “Okay. I need to go. I have meetings and I need to get a handle on myself. Have a safe flight. I’ll see you soon, London.”
“See you soon.”
* * *
Four hours later, I’m in the back of another SUV with Jackson beside me. “We have a bit of a busy afternoon ahead. I’ve scheduled a little pampering for you when we get to my place.”
“Oh? What kind of pampering?”
“A massage, facial, hair, nails, makeup.”
“Oh. How long will all of that take?”
“Probably a few hours. Are you okay with that? I can cancel if you’re not interested.”
He looks disappointed by the prospect, and it’s clear that he wanted to surprise me with something nice. Wanting to give him the satisfaction of doing something sweet is the only thing that outweighs my need for alone time with him.
“How soon after we get to your place will the pampering start?”
“The massage therapist is scheduled to arrive at one.”
I check my phone for the time. It’s already noon, which means we won’t have much time alone, if any at all. “How long is the trip back to your place?”