The guilt wracks through me as I stare into Constantine’s happy eyes. I have finally worked up the nerve, with an immense amount of prodding from Frederick, to tell him about the pregnancy. He is thrilled, and thankfully doesn’t question it for one second that it isn’t his, even though he must feel something from me with this stupid, intimate bond we have with each other. The only thing that springs to mind to fool him, and everyone, Vito included, is that I embrace the magick myself and blame it on that somehow. As a result, I am dabbling with forces that I have no idea about and that scare the living daylights out of me half the time.
“Oh, Aefre, you have made me so happy. Again!” Constantine gushes as he scoops me up and twirls me around. “I love you.” He kisses me soundly on the lips and I return it, feeling the rush of love coursing through me as his hand cups my backside. He starts to tear at my clothes, and I let him, wanting him as much as he wants me in this moment.
It delights me how he has accepted Frederick back into my life so easily, but it is a definite cloud over my relationship with Devon. He knows this is different and he knows I am pulling away from him. I don’t want to hurt him, but Frederick is my main concern now, as long as Constantine is happy, and he seems to be. We talked about it. Well, I fretted, and he calmly told me he accepted it, expected it even, and that it is okay as long as I never left him. And I won’t. I’ve loved him forever and nothing will ever change that. He is my husband and the father of my child.
I gulp. Children.
He can never, ever know that Vito fathered this baby. He will kill everyone within a hundred-mile radius if he does, including me. The guilt descends again having been pushed aside momentarily by my lust.
My heart stops as CK stops walking me back towards the bed suddenly, with a serious look on his face. “I promised a thousand years ago that I would keep you safe, Aefre, and I have failed time and again. I cannot allow that to happen anymore.”
“What are you saying?” I ask, knowing exactly what is coming. It was inevitable. This knowledge has covered up the feeling of guilt, so he hasn’t suspected. “Are you leaving again?” My shrill question makes him wince.
“I must, my sweet. It wasn’t enough,” he replies carefully.
“You said I was safe now. That everyone who was at the trial was dead,” I pout stubbornly.
“I cannot risk it. Yes, I killed them all and destroyed Hunter Headquarters, but the rest fled underground. And where there is one Hunter, others can be recruited.”
“Recruited? They are born into it,” I say, annoyed he has had to ruin this moment.
“That’s what I meant. Even if takes a few years. I must eradicate the entire Hunter bloodlines, then you and our children will be safe.”
“From them, but there is always going to be another threat, Constantine,” I whine. “You cannot just disappear for weeks on end every time something else crops up.”
“I can and I will,” he says just as stubbornly, and I know it’s pointless to even try to convince him otherwise.
I cross my arms and glare at him.
“I will be back before she is born,” he says confidently.
“You don’t know that,” I say, now in a pissy mood. “And you don’t know it’s a she.”
He smiles, that made-for-me smile, and I melt. “Of course it’s a girl,” he says with a slight chuckle.
I grin at him, almost forgetting that this baby isn’t his. Almost.
He must see the shadow pass across my face as he cups my chin and tilts my head up. “I will return to you, my sweet and the World will be a safer place for you and our daughters.”
I nod, not trusting myself not to say anything. Of course, my emotions are running high and that affects my wild magick and my eyes flash with sparks of electricity. I can see them myself, so I know he has too.
He purses his lips. He disapproves of my use of Fae magick, thinking it will corrupt me. He probably isn’t wrong, but what else can I do?
“Perhaps, you should, uh, keep the magick to a minimum?” he suggests cautiously.
“Humph,” I mutter, knowing that I can’t.
He gives me a look that I can’t quite place, so I reach up to pull his head down so that his lips are touching mine.
“Please don’t go,” I whisper.
“I have to,” he says untangling himself from my embrace.
“Then at least have the decency to say good-bye to me properly.”
He chuckles, but then his face goes serious again. “Do not leave these walls without Frederick,” he says.
“I won’t,” I say immediately, because quite frankly the prospect scares me half to death. I may venture outside now and again, especially to ride the horses, but beyond the castle perimeter has yet to be achieved since my return from torture.