I was hangry. And devastated.
I think I had finally reached rock bottom and no one cared.
My fingers smoothly put the key into the lock, twisting the handle to open the apartment door. Immediately I was hit with the sweet smell of meat. Dex was cooking again.
Rumbling, my hungry stomach made itself known as I stepped in and closed the door behind me. Great, this is just what I fucking needed.
I sighed, banging around as I headed to my room. Dex poked his head out at the noise, looking at me like he was approaching a wild animal.
“Harlow, why are on Earth are you banging everything?”
I turned to face him as he stepped out of the kitchen doorframe, his eyes glossy with uncertainty and emotion.
“Why the fuck do you even care?” I snapped, throwing my arms around. “Do you get off on some sick Jekyll and Hyde shit?”
Dex’s face washed over with anger as his eyes jumped with shock. “What the fuck is your problem?”
“You!” I yelled, temporarily distracted by a bang that came from the kitchen besides the fact Dex was here with me. Oh great, there was someone else here too.
As if sensing my question, a shadow appeared behind Dex revealing a tall, slender brunette.
“Who’s this, baby?” she said, her eyes looking me up and down with the look. Yes, the “fat look“. The pitying, disgusting glance you get when people don’t like your body.
Dex kept his eyes on me as he wrapped an arm around her waist. “My roommate, Candice.”
Candice’s eyes lit up with recognition. “Wait, you’re Harlow Falls, aren’t you? What! I didn’t know you lived with her.”
I rolled my eyes, going for a record today as she feigned ignorance. It wasn’t a good look on her.
“And now you do, Candice.”
Her pink little lips flopped open in shock, clearly not used to be spoken back to in such a manner. But that’s the thing. When you feel like you’re not enough, you can become dangerous. A different person.
You start realizing you have nothing to lose.
“Harlow!” Dex yelled, disbelief over his face as he looked at me like he couldn’t believe that poor little Harlow was firing back.
“Go fuck yourself, Dex.”
Candice laughed, clearly desperate to have her input somewhere. “Well he would have to fuck himself, because he’d never fuck you.”
I crossed my arms as I stood tall. “Oh really?” I drew out, my eyes locking with Dex’s. “Is that so, Dex?”
Dex’s face flashed with panic as Candice stood smirking, waiting for him to back her. As the seconds ticked, her face dropped, as she looked at him in confusion.
“Come on, baby. Tell her.”
“Yeah, baby. Tell me,” I mocked.
Dex swallowed, his face hardening as he stiffened.
“She’s right. I would never in a million years fuck you, Harlow. You are a fucking disgrace.”
I expected it. No – encouraged it. Yet it still hurt all the same.
Candice’s face beamed as she grabbed his arm happily. Oh, if only she knew. If only...
I kicked open my bedroom door, walking away from them as I slammed the door shut behind me. The urge to scream was pushing me towards the edge. Black dots of anger blurred my vision as I tried to breathe in.
Count to ten... I told myself, trying to get in touch with my senses.
But slowly the dots widened, turning into grey... then white... before my hearing started to become distorted.
Then nothing.