I launched myself at him, raining overhead blows down at him, my fists striking his chest. “HOW STUPID DO YOU THINK I AM?! YOU FUCKING LYING, CHEATING, SON OF A BITCH!”
He backed away from my fury as he tried to calm me down. “Kaitlyn – Kaitlyn, stop – Kaitlyn, it’s not what you think – stop – ”
Of course, he didn’t calm me down, he only made me madder.
Finally he had enough and grabbed my wrists and held me there, my arms suspended in the air. I tried to wrench away, but he was far too strong.
“Kaitlyn, it’s not what you think.”
“Oh yeah?” I half-sneered, half-cried. By now tears were trailing my cheeks – tears of hurt, tears of rage. “So you didn’t pick up some model groupie last night and rent a hotel room so you could fuck her?”
“No. We’ve been seeing each other for two years.”
I stopped struggling and just stared at him.
I wanted to puke.
He could tell that the fight had gone out of me, and he stopped holding me by the wrists and instead put his hands on mine.
As soon as he did, I ripped them away and took a step back. I couldn’t stand for him to touch me.
“But it doesn’t mean anything, Kaitlyn,” he said in a low voice. “It’s not like you and me, and what we have – ”
“Doesn’t
mean
anything?” a voice whimpered behind me. I could hear the tremor in her tone, the pain in her words. “What the hell, Derek?”
I looked over at her, and for the first time, I felt bad for her. She was physically trembling, and tears were welling up in her eyes.
She wasn’t the whore who had slept with my boyfriend.
She was just some woman who had been dicked over by the same asshole as me.
Derek looked up like he had realized she was still standing there, and I could see the
Oh
shit
play out on his face.
I wanted to punch him so bad.
I wanted to break his fucking nose.
“Tawny,” he said –
Tawny.
Of COURSE her name was ‘Tawny.’
“Look, babe, it’s been awesome – but…”
He just trailed off, like there was nothing more to say.
She just stood there shaking, tears streaking down her cheeks.
“Fuck you, Derek,” she said softly, and grabbed her things off the nearest chair, then walked out of sight, presumably to some other part of the suite.
I looked up at him and rubbed the tears out of my own eyes. “Two years?”
He looked beaten, defeated. He nodded. “Yeah.”
“What, is she your real girlfriend?”
“What?! No. She’s just… every time I was in Vegas or LA, we’d hook up. She lives here.”
My stomach turned. I really
did
want to puke. “So she’s just some
groupie –
”
“No! No. I mean – look, I actually met with her to tell her it was off. That you and I were together now. And… well… one thing just led to another…”
“Riiiiight,” I sneered.
“I swear to God,” he said angrily, as though incensed I didn’t believe him.
“Just like you swore when you left me that you weren’t going to fuck any women? Any models, any groupies, any nuns? Remember
that?!”
He glanced away, breathed out heavily. “I’m telling you the truth. I didn’t come here planning on sleeping with her.”
“You’re so full of shit,” I raged. The tears were falling fast now, hot and stinging my eyes.
He looked back at me, and his face was full of sorrow. “I’m sorry, Kaitlyn. I fucked up. I know I did, and I’m really, really sorry.”
For a moment he almost had me. I wanted to believe him so badly… I wanted all this hurt to go away… I wanted him to take me in his arms and swear that he would never do it again, and I would forgive him, and everything would be back to the way it was weeks ago when we were madly in love –
And then reality intruded at exactly the right moment.
Tawny spoke up from behind me. Her voice was soft, but clear and unwavering.
“You’re an asshole, Derek Kane.”
I turned back to see her. She was crying, just like me. Her makeup was smeared, her clothing was in disarray from dressing quickly, but she was holding herself with as much dignity as she could.
She stared him down hatefully, then turned and walked out of the hotel room.