My heart clenches at once. I’ve given away too much, haven’t I? He can’t know about the pregnancy. Not yet. It’s too soon.
For the first time in my life, I don’t panic or screw it up. I just pivot seamlessly. “Two point three of them. A fluffy dog, too. The American dream.”
“And a fucking white picket fence, no doubt.”
“Come on, Adrik,” I plead. “Be normal and simple and boring with me, even if it’s just for a minute. Forget about your brother and your dad. Forget about your wars and our traumas. Let’s be normal. Let’s be happy. Let’s be… together.”
I didn’t know until I said it just how badly I want that. It’s every girl’s dream, right? Reform the bad boy with a heart of gold? It’s also the recipe for heartbreak, and Lord knows I’ve had my heart shattered and stomped on already.
But it’s not over yet. There’s still hope for us.
I have to believe in it.
Adrik’s eyebrows narrow into an angry downward V. For a moment, I wonder if I’ve gone too far.
Then he spins around, scoops me up, and drops me on top of his desk. His warm hands smooth up my thighs, heading for the button of my jeans.
“I don’t need to be normal,” he says, ripping my jeans down my legs and tossing them over his shoulder. “I don’t want to be normal.”
"Why not?"
He leans in, his lips only an inch from mine. "Because being me is better."
Adrik hooks his fingers beneath the waistband of my panties. I lift my hips to help him shimmy the delicate material down my legs.
"I am the kind of man who takes what he wants. I am the kind of man who fights for what he has. I am the man who fucks his wife on his dead ex-fiancée’s bed, because the past can’t contain me and I mold the future to my liking."
He growls all this one low, slow, feral word at a time. As he does, his fingers are working—pressing my knees apart, dancing up my thighs, amping up the heat between my legs to levels I didn’t know it could reach.
His hand drifts to my center. Lazily, he drags his thumb over my slit and I bite back a moan. I'm already wet and aching for him. Aching so bad, so fucking bad, it hurts how much I want him.
I reach between us and feel him. He's straining against the zipper. When I pull it down and slide his boxers low, his cock springs free.
Adrik snarls as my hand wraps around his thickness. "My life may be dark and bloody and messy, but I'm alive because I earned it. I'm alive because I fought," he says, gritting his teeth as I start to pump slowly.
He grabs my shirt and rips it over my head. My bra is on the floor a second later. Adrik presses his hands over my breasts and my pointed nipples, kneading my flesh, drawing more and faster moans from my lips.
"And when you've fought to earn your place amongst the living, you get to enjoy the spoils," he grimaces. "So I drink more and I fuck more. Because unlike some normal asshole in a normal tie sitting behind his normal computer, I know what lurks in the dark."
He curls a finger inside of me and does slow circles over my clit. I try to match his rhythm, stroking him at the same pace, but my movements are jerky, spasming. Adrik is short-circuiting my brain and my body all at once.
"And… and what…" My words are lost in another strangled moan as his thumb works over my clit. I wrap my legs around his hips, drawing him closer, giving him more of me. "And what lurks in the dark?" I finally manage.
He's fucking me with his fingers now, tying me into a knot I'm not sure will ever come undone. I'm writhing on the desk, scrambling to hold onto him while arching away from the overwhelming pleasure.
"Monsters," Adrik says quietly. He wraps his free hand in the roots of my hair and presses my face into his chest. He’s all I can smell, all I can breathe. His heat warms my cheeks as I gasp into him.
I'm seeing stars, but I try to keep my wits. This was my game. I can't lose complete control. "To the normal people, you're the monster."
When he pulls back to look at me, his expression is predatory. His blue eyes eaten away by the black of his pupil. He's looking at me like he wants to devour me whole.
"And what do you think, Emery Montague?"
I close my eyes, riding his hand and moaning like I’m some shameless whore of his. Hell, maybe I am. "Think… what?" I mumble.
Warmth gathers in a tight ball in my stomach, ready to burst. I tense up. I’m right there. I’m right, right, right…
Then, all at once, Adrik pulls his hand away.
I fumble forward, gasping as the tension dissipates.
"Do you think I'm a monster?" Adrik asks. He’s got a wicked grin on his face.
It feels like he just poured a bucket of cold water on my head. It takes me a few seconds to hear the question.
Yes!part of me wants to shout. But it would be a lie.
Because in my head, I can still hear him offering himself to Malcolm in my place when we stood in the foyer of the mansion. Take me instead.
I still see him cradling Isabella against his chest as we trekked through the woods in search of safety, with wolves and rapists at our heels. Don’t fear, I am with you.
I’ve seen too much of what’s beneath the surface to still believe that Adrik is as bad as he wants me to think.
I know the truth. I know what’s possible.
So I shake my head. "No. You're not a monster."
He stares at me for a second and then smiles. "That's because you aren't normal, either."
Just as quickly as he abandoned me, he comes back. But this time, it’s his cock between my legs. I arch into him just as he thrusts, and instantly, I’m full of him.
I try to roll my hips against him, but Adrik takes control. He slides his hands under my ass and then drags me onto his length. I cry out when his hips meet mine and he’s buried as deep as he can possibly go.
Again and again, he impales me. The slow need he built before comes rushing back and all it takes is a few thrusts before I’m teetering on the precipice again.
“Give in to what you want,” Adrik growls, his breath hot and labored. “You didn’t run from the monster. You let him fuck you. You let him put his ring on your finger. So don’t pretend you’re still afraid, kiska. Give in. Come for me.”
That’s all it takes. I don't just break—I shatter.
The orgasm crashes over me violently. I throw my head back as I moan like I’ve never moaned before. As the sound rips out of my lips, I claw at his exposed skin, wanting him to hurt and need and burn the way I am.
Adrik never once slows his pace. Our bodies slap together as I clench helplessly around his hard cock again and again.
"You feel so good," Adrik snarls. “So fucking tight and wet.”
I feel his release, hot and sudden inside of me, and it just sends me spiraling even more out of control.
We grind together. The pace grows slower and slower until silent stillness steals over us again. Breathing heavily. Still connected, though I’m slumped against him like I may never move again.
"Do you still want to be normal?" Adrik murmurs in my ear.
My legs are still quivering, my body recovering from what we just did, but I still feel more desire perk up. I wonder if that will ever go away. My need for him. This heat between us.
"No," I admit. "No, I don't want to be normal."
He strokes my lower lip with his thumb and nods, satisfied. "Good girl.”