Daisy's Decision (Icehome)

“You take good care of me,” I say, fluttering my lashes.

O’jek’s gaze flicks to my mouth and he gets a strange expression on his face, suddenly concentrating on his own bowl. “You should take care of yourself.”

I ignore that, because I’ve been trained for years to be the perfect companion. I sit quietly when the important people talk, I don’t fidget, and I’m an expert at looking pretty. I excel at flirting. I know how to start conversations in six languages, how to ease away from tricky topics, and I can instantly pick out who is the most important person in a room. It’s all useless here, but I do know how to take care of myself. “And rob you of your fun?”

The look on his face is distinctly flustered. “It is not fun, D’see. I worry about you.” He taps his spoon on the edge of my bowl. “And do not talk and distract me. Eat.”

Smiling, I take a bite. Now that he’s “fixed” it for me, I get a burst of flavor with every bite. It’s tangy and slightly woodsy, reminding me a bit of the scent of juniper trees from home. You wouldn’t think it would make a delightful flavor but it grows on you. O’jek’s good at knowing just how much to add to keep it from being overpowering. I take another bite, and then another, and we eat in comfortable silence. As I chew, I watch him. It’s hard not to, especially with everything that’s been on my mind. He’s got really nice arms. And his thighs are like granite, I decide. Slightly furry granite, but it’s his lower legs that are covered in a thick down of dark fur. I actually don’t even mind that, because I know it’s nice to curl my toes against during cold nights. His nose is straight and if it seems slightly large, it matches his too-wide, sensual mouth rather well, I think.

I eat the last bite of my food and finish my water, and then set both bowls aside to take down to the shore to rinse out later. I’m not leaving this hut until we have our conversation first.

O’jek sets his bowl aside and gazes at me. “I have thought about your offer.”

“And?” I try to hide my eagerness.

“Why me?”

I wait for him to say more, and when he doesn’t continue, I realize he’s waiting for me to answer him. Oh. “What do you mean, why you? Because we’re friends, O’jek.”

“You are friends with R’jaal,” he points out. “You are friends with I’rec. Why did you ask me?”

He knows the answer to this. I’m confused why he’s asking. I’m closer to him than the others. He looks after me. We can talk for hours and not get bored with one another. He knows these reasons, and yet I suspect he’s looking for something more. Feeling vulnerable, I hesitate and then confess, “Because I trust you. When I suggested it, you didn’t laugh at me. I’rec would laugh at me and make me feel stupid. R’jaal would probably say yes if I asked him but…not R’jaal.”

“Why not R’jaal?” he presses, intensity in his gaze.

My throat goes dry. “I-I don’t know! I just think about touching him to make a baby and it’s just…weird.” I shudder. “Like I’d be touching my little brother or something. And I’m not attracted to him or I’rec. You’re the only one I can imagine having sex with enough to make a baby. I think with you it…it wouldn’t be awful. That we’re friends enough and we talk enough that it wouldn’t be weird.”

O’jek eyes me, his hands on his knees as he sits. His back is stiff, but he’s not leaving, so I guess I passed whatever that test was. “You would not dislike it if I touched you?”

“Of course not. That’s why I asked you. And we touch all the time,” I point out. “We sleep together more often than not.”

“That is not the same as making a baby.”

“I know.” The intensity in his gaze makes me clench my thighs, oddly enough. “I know how sex works. I’d still rather do it with you.” When some of the tightness in him eases, I realize he needed to hear that. I’m such an idiot. For all my training on how to be the proper, pretty flirt, I’m pretty dumb when it comes to confessing how I feel. I slide a little closer to him. “I like looking at you, all right? I like your body. I like your eyes and your mouth and your smile. And I like the way you feel against me when we sleep together.”

“What if choosing me like this robs you of a mate later?” he blurts. “What if you are meant to be with I’rec or R’jaal and they never resonate because we are being selfish?”