-S
“Send me the bill, Blake.” I say in a mocking tone. Like him paying for the cleaners would somehow make sneaking out before I woke up all okay, and like I’d actually send him the bill for it. Fuck that. I’d fork out my own money if it wasn’t included before I’d ever ask that man for anything. Better yet, I’d rather get on my hands and knees and scrub this place down before I’d ever rely on him for anything.
I shake my arms out and try to get a grip. Meaningless sex is all I wanted too. It didn’t mean anything last night. Just because it felt like we connected on a different level than before doesn’t mean anything. Fucking Christ, get a grip Blake. I’ve fucking turned into one of Sawyer’s groupies.
Fuck. If that doesn’t motivate me to get control of myself, nothing will.
I walk over to my purse that I threw on the floor last night and grab my phone. My heart sinks when I don’t see any calls or messages from him. I was kind of hoping he had some excuse for leaving without even saying goodbye. Something that could level the playing field not leaving him with such an upper hand.
I sigh as I walk back toward my own room. It probably doesn’t even matter anyway. I let him fuck me. He probably won’t be around much anymore. I guess that’s all I needed to do in the first place to get him to leave me alone.
But do I want to be left alone? Ugh! I was perfectly content before Sawyer had to put all these dumb ideas in my head. I do have friends. I also love my career. There’s nothing wrong with that. I don’t shut people out. I’m just busy.
I don’t want to be here anymore, so I call the airport to see if there are any earlier flights, and luckily I was able to move mine up by a few hours. I think about last night the whole flight home. I shouldn’t be feeling this attached to it. It must be because I haven’t slept with anyone in a while. My hormones are just out of whack.
That’s it. All I need to do is find someone else to sleep with. Once I do that, I can get rid of all these stupid emotions I’m feeling right now. I hope at least. God, I hope.
???
Erin walks up to my desk Monday morning. “You bitch!” She yells at me.
I open my eyes, surprised. “What the fuck did I do?”
She purses her lips to the side and crosses her arms. “You didn’t text me back the whole weekend! The whole weekend that you were stranded with Mr. Sexy himself!”
I roll my eyes and turn back toward my computer. “Sorry. Service is spotty there.”
She sits down on the edge of my desk. “I know the cabin has wifi, and I sent you texts through messenger too!” She narrows her eyes at me.
“Sorry.” I grumble.
Her smile returns. “I don’t want your apology. I want details!”
A throat clears behind her, and she whips around. “Oh.” She says. “Uhm...I’ll talk to you later Blake. I have to uhh....do a thing.” She speed walks away so I am left alone with Sawyer.
His eyes stare back into mine, and I try to hold it as long as possible, but I just can’t. I look away back at my computer. “I thought you’d be out on sales calls today.” I say casually.
He sits halfway on the edge of my desk. “Yeah, I wanted to check in with the team since everything went down. You know, do managery things.”
I give a tight lipped smile. “Sounds good. Let me know if you need anything.” Then I turn back toward the computer.
He doesn’t leave. “Blake…” He trails off, and I turn toward him. “Are we good?” He asks.
I raise an eyebrow at him. “We’re never good. I’ll loathe you until the end of eternity. Nothing’s changed if that’s what you mean.”
He gives a half smile, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Good.” He taps the desk. “I just didn’t want things to be weird between us. We were just both there alone. It didn’t mea-.”
I cut him off. “Let’s please just forget about it. Never happened.”
I stand from my desk because I can’t look at him anymore, and I have a feeling he’s going to linger a while longer. “Excuse me.” I say as I walk away.
I only make it a few steps when I see Todd’s smiling face. I let out a sigh of relief. Now I have an actual excuse to be leaving Sawyer. “Todd!” I say excitedly. “You’re back!”
I walk right up to him and give him a hug. He tenses at first, probably shocked that I’m hugging him since I don’t think I’ve ever done that before, but then he relaxes into it and squeezes me back. “It’s good to be back.” He pulls back and grins at me. “I’d be lying if I didn’t say you’re a big part of that.”
I bite my lip and then laugh louder than I need to. “Since when did you become such a charmer?” I playfully slap his arm.
I know Sawyer is watching. I can feel his eyes on me. I try to push aside the feeling. Todd smiles back and leans in closer. “Sorry, it’s just I kept re-reading that text you sent. It’s been driving me insane.”