She sets the laptop down and curls herself around to hug me. Her arms are tight as she angles into my lap. “That was the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me.” I hold her just as tight in my arms and kiss the side of her head.
Snug in my lap, she grasps my face and kisses me. “Is this your way of getting me in bed on my first day as your roommate? I don’t usually put out until at least a week into a lease.”
We both start laughing. “The levity feels nice, but I meant what I said.”
“Oh, I know you do.” She giggles. “But I’m thinking you prefer me naked.”
I kiss her and then lean my forehead against hers. “You read me like a book.”
“Like a fairy tale.”
Leaning back, I need to read her eyes. “Thought you didn’t believe in those.”
She sighs with a little swoon at the end. “Because of you, I’m starting to change my mind.”
“My work here is done.”
Sitting up, she says, “Speaking of . . . you go work. I have more bags to list anyway.”
“Are you listing them all tonight?”
“No. I can’t rip off the bandage entirely, not yet.”
Nodding, I see the worry creasing her forehead. But I’m reminded of what she said minutes earlier. I don’t like that she thinks I’m saving her, so I don’t add to her stress or take away from what I know she’s capable of doing on her own. I’d never want that. “If you need anything, you know where to find me.”
The email thread shifts into excuses. That’s not something I have a high tolerance for, so I reply, reminding the Michigan team that my funding is based on results. Our agreement was six months.
“Why are you working in the dark?”
I look up just as I push send. “Huh?”
The shape of Marlow is a silhouette with the dim light from the living room just reaching the doorway of my home office. She comes in behind me and starts rubbing my shoulders. “You’re tense.”
Taking a deep breath, I rest back and let the massage work in, closing my eyes and slowly exhaling. “Some days are better than others.”
“Is this a bad day?”
I cover one of her hands with mine and spin while pulling her onto my lap. She’s smiling, and even though there’s not much light from the city reaching in, I see the glimmer in her eyes that comes from within. “Today is a good day.”
“I agree.” Tilting her head, she whispers, “We didn’t discuss the living arrangement. Since we donated my bed to the shelter, I have nowhere to sleep—”
“You have a bed. It’s right there across the hall.”
“That’s yours.”
I take her hand and bring it to my mouth to kiss. The palm. The top. Her wrist. And then our fingers fold together. “It’s ours. As long as you’re here, that’s your room, your bed, your—”
“Jackson.”
I don’t know why that catches me sideways, but I feel like that’s what I’ve been waiting to hear for so long. “Everything here is yours for the taking.”
She dips down and kisses my cheek. “What are we doing?”
Although I’d like to play dumb, I can’t. I know what she means, and we had this conversation, which was followed by a trail of reasons we’re not meant to be just yet. I cup her cheek and run my thumb over her soft skin. “We’re adjusting the plan based on new information. That’s all. There’s no pressure to be more than we are.”
Bringing her legs up closer to her chest, she’s smaller when she’s uncertain and balled up in my lap, making me feel even more protective of her. “What are we?”
“Hey?” I tip her chin up. “We’re Marlow and Jackson. That’s all we need to be.”
It’s not the best answer, but it’s all I can give her, and what she needs to hear. I won’t pressure her because I don’t even know what I want. I didn’t expect her to be living here, but I can’t deny how good it feels to move in a new direction.
What happens happens and all that. “We’ll just play it by ear.” Standing up, I set her on her feet again. “It’s late. You ready for bed?”
“Bed? No. But I’ve been ready for you all day.” She takes me by the hand and pulls me from the spare room and into the bedroom. Wrapping her arms around my neck, she slides them down my chest and then even lower. With a snap, she releases the band of my jeans. Wearing a devious little grin on her face, Marlow starts to dip down to her knees. “Now, let’s get back to that thank you . . .”
15
Marlow
The thud of Cammie’s handbag landing on the wood bench should have been an early warning sign for her mood.