“Ryder’s right. Pack your shit, Frosty. You’re back at the clubhouse until all this gets resolved,” Blade orders.
Frosty looks up at the ceiling, then at all of us. “You know I have a self-destruct mechanism that I have personally built for all my equipment.”
“I do.” Blade looks at him. “I want you at the clubhouse.”
“Really? I can’t work at the clubhouse. It’s distracting—”
“Put him in my room.” Axel reaches for one of his burner phones. “I’ll let Ox know.”
Frosty sighs, then shakes his head. “Fine. I’ll get packed.”
“Send Floppy to help him with his stuff,” Blade says. “Let’s eat.”
I toss my phone on the table. I need to focus on the club and, apparently, my arrest rather than a pair of blue eyes and lips that were made to wrap around my cock.
I lean forward, my eyes narrowing on Frosty who is looking around as if he’s forgetting something. “I want you to locate everyone who was in that van, Frosty. Names and where they live. Start with that.”
“Fucking perfect.” Edge scowls. “Dolly’s gonna love this. How much of a lockdown are we thinking?”
“We do business as usual until Frosty gets more information,” Blade commands. “Where the fuck is Poet?”
“He’s at the gyno with Charlie, remember?” Edge drops into the chair that Frosty vacated and leans his head back, staring up at the ceiling as he smokes.
“I don’t need to remind you that I’m dealing with Dolly, and you all know how she is when she’s pregnant.” He’s worried, scared of losing what he has.
“Edge, shut up. You’re not the only one being affected,” Axel sneers, tossing his burger down on a napkin.
“Fuck you, Axel—”
“Enough,” Blade roars. “Frosty, bring your stuff to the clubhouse by tonight. And the less Dolly knows, the better—that goes for all of our women.” He looks around the table.
Edge shakes his head and puffs on the cigarette. “This is bad.”
“Edge. They’re after me.” I grab my bag of food. “This is personal to someone.” I look down at my phone, fighting the need to check on her.
Later. Wait until later.
I’m too wound up to taste the burger, and the fries are cold, but I eat them anyway. My mind is detached from the conversation that’s bouncing around the table.
I lean forward and take the bottle of Jack from Axel, who looks concerned. He has no need to be. I’m well aware of what needs to be done. It’s my mistake, my fuckup to fix. My mind drifts.
I see her already, my good girl. She’ll be restless, fighting her need. And I’ll watch, zoom in on her face, so I pinpoint the exact second when she gives up. I can already hear her moan as she spreads her legs, fingers seeking her clit, rubbing it hard, making it pink, slick, and swollen. Her hand will freeze, and she’ll arch up like a cat as she cries out my name.
Fuck. I blink, bringing the bottle to my lips, and drink enough to numb my brain.
Julianna is mine. I’ve sacrificed my happiness to keep her safe from me.
I watch her, protect her. My endless need, my drug that I can’t kick.
Obsession.
A need that grows until all rational thought bleeds away.
She believes the worst of me, thinking that I’ve left her. But I’m always with her.
Day and night.
JULIANNA
Present
Burbank, CA
“You sure about this?” My Uber driver looks back at me cautiously as he slowly turns his Chevy Volt onto the dirt road leading to the Disciples’ compound.
“Yes, it’s fine.” I smile. I’d be surprised if the poor kid is nineteen.
“Wait,” I yell.
He slams on the brakes, and I reach out to catch myself from flying forward.
“Sorry,” he says, looking straight ahead, both hands clutching the steering wheel in a death grip.
I take a deep breath and point to the side. “Just pull over and let me text, please.” I’m trying to sound calm since he’s clearly freaking out. Not that I blame him. Memories of my first time driving on this road make me falter. I was convinced a group of wild bikers were going to shoot me. Instead, I discovered Ryder having sex. Oh God, maybe showing up unannounced was not a good idea.
“Jesus,” I mutter under my breath. My face heats up as I grab my phone. The driver keeps looking around, on alert. I roll my eyes, like he’d be able to do anything even if he did see something.
“This is… I mean, we’re allowed in here, right?”
“Yes,” I snap.
The driver’s anxiety is making me second-guess myself. I can’t have that right now. I’m here, for fuck’s sake. Worst-case scenario, I catch Ryder doing something I can’t forgive. No, we’re not together. I need to remember this.
Screw that.
With the mood I’m in, if I catch him having sex with someone else right now, I can’t be sure I won’t shoot him.