“Skin as white as snow,” he says low, his eyes hungry as he feasts on my body before him. “I want to be gentle with you”—our gazes lock—“but I don’t know if I can.”
His threat should leave me apprehensive, but it doesn’t. It only excites me further. “I don’t want gentle.” Reaching for the hem of his shirt, I yank it from his body, mewling when I’m engulfed in the sight and smell. “I just want you.”
Those keywords make what we’re about to do all the more real. I don’t know who lunges for who first, but it’s a flurry of hands and lips. The moment I press my chest to Cayden’s, a sated groan leaves us both. He peels the dress from my body, his lips following in his fingers’ wake. Every stroke of his tongue and glide of his lips have me desperate for so much more.
When he reaches the junction between my breasts, he gently nestles his nose into my flesh. “You smell like home,” he whispers, bathing my skin in warmth. “You are the only woman I have ever loved. From the first moment I saw you, I was ruined. Our love has been messy, and it also has been cruel, but I wouldn’t give it up for the world because you are my world.”
An unexpected tear rolls down my cheek because his admission is bittersweet. Our journey has been anything but easy, but I want that to change. “Love me,” I say, reaching behind my back and unhooking my bra. It falls to the floor.
My breasts are exposed, and a flush spreads over my pale skin when Cayden sits back on his heels, stroking his stubble in reflection. I wonder if I look different from how he remembers. Suddenly feeling self-conscious, I wrap an arm around myself, shielding my nudity, but he won’t have it.
“No more hiding.” He tenderly coaxes me to lower my shield. I do. “I just…I just can’t believe how beautiful you are. No matter how many times we’re together, it always feels like the first time.”
He leans forward, running his nose down the length of my neck, his stubble a perfect abrasion to my heated skin. He cups my left breast, running his thumb over my budded nipple. We both moan at the connection. He wets his lips before sampling me, and I think I’m going to die right here where I kneel.
He tongues the underside while reaching up to gently caress my right. My head drops back. He circles my areola, kissing over the small, heart-shaped freckle. Wetness gathers between my legs, and shamelessly, I rub them together. The burn hurts so good.
With his mouth still working me into a frenzy, Cayden walks his fingers to the outside of my underwear. I know he can feel my arousal, so when he rubs two fingers in a sluggish circle, I open my legs wider, granting him permission to take it all. A grunt catches in the back of his throat.
“Please…” I whimper, not above begging. Cayden gives me what I want. He slips his hand into my underwear and cups my sex. “Oh…God.”
Nothing should feel this good, nothing. But when he sinks one finger into me, I am done for.
We both hiss, and I surrender. Now and forever.
“I love you.” His admission, coupled with what he is doing to my body, has me realizing that our love is the kind of love you read about in books. The all-consuming, soul-shattering obsessive kind of love that consumes your every breath. “You don’t have to say it back. I just want you to know.”
I want to say it back, but until I mean it like he does, I will show him how I feel rather than tell him.
Dragging his face to mine, I smash my lips to his, expressing my love for him through a kiss with the ability to change the world forever. We stand, our lips never breaking pace as we lower ourselves to the bed. We shift until my head hits the pillow with Cayden lying on top of me.
I explore his glorious body, my fingers drifting over to the tattoo on his flank. I remember when I first saw it, and I knew it meant more than meets the eye—just like him. Our relationship seems to have never strayed far from his thoughts. And that fact warms not only my body but my heart as well.
His abs ripple as I stroke over the hardened flesh. His pleasure has me venturing farther down. I unsnap the button on his jeans, biting my lip when I slowly lower his zipper. I’m nervous, so damn nervous when I reach into his boxer briefs. But when I feel his hot, hard length, my wanton need steadily replaces those nerves.
He grunts, breaking our kiss to savor the feel of me reacquainting myself with his body. Bashful at first, I struggle with where to put my hands, but when he pulsates in my palm, all coyness takes a back seat. My desire gets amped to ten billion volts, and it’s sensory overload as I want him slathered all over me.
I stroke his shaft while he lowers his forehead to my shoulder, an almost cry of relief that we’ve found one another in a ferocious storm. “I never thought I’d feel this again,” he expresses his fears, unguarded. His honesty has me lowering my guard as well as I increase my rhythm.
He cups my cheek, kissing me fervently as he lowers his jeans. It’s his turn to be in control. When we’re pressed flesh upon flesh, he breaks the kiss, only to continue down my chin and over my pounding pulse. He tongues between the hollow of my throat before embarking farther. He devours my breasts while I remember to breathe.
When I’m a writhing mess, he descends lower. His lips score my skin as he kisses over my stomach and circles my navel with his tongue. His eyes set me on fire as he peers up at me from between my legs, then lowers his mouth to the outside of my underwear, kissing me gently. This is pure torture, which is exactly what Cayden wants.
Fisting the duvet, I squirm, wanting so much more. His breathy chuckle just adds to the torment. He kisses my inner thighs, paying attention to the freckles which line my skin. I wonder how many times we have been entwined this way.
“Were you my first time?” I ask, threading my fingers through his hair.
“Yes,” he replies against my thigh. “I was your first everything. Just as you were mine.”
The thought is electrifying because it feels like I’m about to relive something that has always belonged to the man whose kisses are filled with nothing but utter worship and desire. “Help me remember.”
Cayden lays one final kiss over my underwear, then sits back on his heels and visually devours me once more. He traces from my face downward, ensuring no part of me remains untouched. When he gets to the waistband of my underwear, I shiver because things are about to get real.
With a sharp tug, he tears them from my body, the final layer finally shredding its confines. My eyes drift to his length, which extends from his body proudly. His tanned skin complements his ripped physique. I love the scruff between his pecs that plunges down to the dark softness between his legs. I want him. All of him. I want it now.
Shyly, I shift, opening my legs, desperate to take the inevitable step which was always fated in the stars. Cayden hisses, then reaching into the side dresser, he hunts for protection. I watch mesmerized as he takes off his jeans and then sheathes himself. “You’re sure?” he asks, stroking his finger along my bottom lip.
“Yes. It’s time we make new memories.” It’s all the response he needs.
He presses us together, and the feeling is pure bliss. We kiss languidly, lost in the sensation of finding one another again. He’s everywhere, robbing me of breath and replacing it with this life force that has me feeling reborn.
Even though I know where he’s headed, it doesn’t prepare me for the tremor that overrides me when he lowers his mouth to my sex. My back arches on its own accord as I have no control over my body, but Cayden does. He buries himself, sampling me in one hot lick. My eyes roll into the back of my head as he hums against my sex.
He suckles me while adding a finger, ensuring I’m primed for what’s about to come. My ripened, slick center is pleading for a reprieve, and when Cayden flicks over the swell with his tongue, I’m more than ready. Unrefined sounds slip past my lips as I shamelessly chase my release.
He stretches me farther, and just when I’m seconds away from bursting, he lets me go. I cry out in frustration, but that soon turns into a low guttural whimper when he places his blunt head against my entrance. My eyes pop open as I peer up and lock gazes with him.