I ease toward the door and pause in the opening to find Luke sitting on the end of the bed. Actually, he’s laying back on the mattress with his feet still on the ground. As if he was just resting for a minute. Seconds tick by and I realize he’s asleep. Exhaustion weighs heavily in my limbs and despite my deep desire to talk to him, I know I have to let him sleep.
There’s a chair in the corner and I claim it, pulling a blanket over the top of me. When he wakes, at least he’ll know I came to find him. He’ll know I’m here. I hope desperately, with every part of me, that in the stormy season we’re now living in our relationship, this moment is the first step toward a rainbow. And instead of a pot of gold, we can find each other again.
Chapter Twenty-One
Ana
Snuggled under my blanket, with only a dim bedside light illuminating the room and him, I watch Luke sleep, not that I can see much of him but his legs, but it doesn’t matter. He’s a gorgeous, loyal, wonderful man, who in his imperfection becomes perfect in my eyes. The truth is that he presents himself to the world as the solid, confident, steady figure, arrogant even, at times, but those times relate to work.
My mind flashes back to a day at the ranch. Kurt had invited us out to train, always pushing us to stay fresh, skilled, always growing. Luke had invited me into the combat circle inside the gym. Ten men had watched us, and while Luke was bigger, stronger, I held my own. I’d seen the respect in his eyes that day, as if yes, he realized I was Kurt’s stepdaughter. He didn’t realize before that day I was one of his trainees as well, and that I had, in fact, trained with him all my life.
It was right after that when trouble started, when Kasey cut in and wanted to fight Luke.
“No,” I’d said, facing Luke, hands on his chest. “This is not a good idea.”
Luke had captured my hand and said, “It has to happen. You know that.”
On some level, I had known. Kasey was combative with Luke. He needed to respect him, but Kasey foolishly believed that because of his years of training with Kurt, he’d win this battle. Luke, however, I already knew, didn’t just train with Kurt. He trained with several men of Kurt’s caliber and that experience, along with his active duty, made him the better fighter.
It took Luke about ten minutes to lay Kasey out. He could have done it in two. He let him save face.
Kurt always said two skilled fighters would be divided by intelligence, maturity, experience, control, and a good gut instinct. He later told me Luke won on every count over Kasey. He told Kasey, too, and that didn’t help matters. He and Luke were destined to always bump heads.
Luke was too much like Kurt. Kasey was too different. Luke’s gut instinct told him this hit list originates with Kurt. I need to set aside predisposed notions about him and think about what I’ve missed. What have I missed?
I squeeze my eyes shut and I’m back in the past, remembering the last day I saw Kurt. Luke and I were both leaving on jobs. We’d woken up that morning in each other’s arms, naked, pressed close. We’d made love, a slow, sensual joining of our bodies, we’d finished with an hour of just talking. “I don’t want you to go,” I whisper.
He’s tender and sweet, stroking my hair from my face. “I’m going to buy you your ranch and horses.”
“I’d rather you just stop going on these missions. I’m terrified of the day you don’t come home.”
“I live that every day you go to work,” he replies. “Thank God you’re a badass. Thank Kurt, too.”
Two hours later at least, I’d been packing for an undercover mission in Tennessee when someone knocked at the door. It had been Kurt, who never came to me. I always went to him. I drift between slumber and that memory, reliving it. I open the door to find him standing there, muscles bulging from his T-shirt sleeves. “What are you doing here?”
“I’m leaving on a mission. Since we’ll both be gone a while, I thought I’d bring by those pastries you love so much.” He indicates the bag in his hand.
I smile and invite him in, but there’s a niggle of unease in me. “You’re going on a mission?” I ask as we settle at my kitchen table. “I thought you retired from this kind of thing?”
“Really bad guys sometimes need to be dealt with by really bad guys like me.”
“You’re not a really bad guy.”
“Well, what you don’t know won’t hurt you, honey.” He motions to the bag. “Pull out one of those pastries and hand it over.”