Walking away, ignoring her as she calls my name, I push open the door and walk out into the frigid temperatures.
“Oh, thank God,” I breathe, sucking in the cold air and letting it out fast.
I can’t do this.
I won’t do this.
My baby deserves a chance.
I just hope Jace agrees.
As much as I want to keep it, I know that wouldn’t be smart. So maybe adoption is the best choice. I don’t know how he feels, but I can’t do this. I just can’t.
When I hear a car door slam, I look to the left to see Jace running toward me.
“I’m so fucking sorry I’m late,” he says, looking at the building and then me. “You didn’t do it, did you?” he pants, panic in his eyes, and I shake my head.
“No,” I cry and he falls forward, bracing his hands to his thighs, letting out a long breath. Almost in relief.
“Oh, God,” he mutters, causing my brows to come together.
Is that a good “Oh, God” or a bad?
“I’m sorry, Jace, but I can’t. I know I said this is the only option, but it isn’t. We can give it up for adoption. It can have a good life with someone else—”
“Oh
my God,” he yells, standing erect and looking at me with tears filling his eyes. His eyes are bloodshot, his face is red, and God, he looks so tired. “Shut up and let me breathe for a second,” he yells and I pause, surprised, as he pants with tears escaping out of his eyes.
“Are you okay?”
“No,” he yells, his eyes wild as he takes me by my arms. “I thought you got rid of our baby. I thought I was too late,” he cries, sucking in a deep breath, and I can only stare up at him. He is a hot mess. A pair of shorts hangs low on his hips, paired with a hoodie that is obviously too small for his big frame. Running his hands up his face, he knocks his beanie off his head, catching it behind him as he looks up to the sky, pulling in another deep breath. Looking back down at me, he shakes his head. “I don’t want you to do this. I want you to have the baby, with me.”
“What?” I ask, my eyes refilling with tears as my heart goes crazy in my chest. “But last night—”
“Baby, I was freaking the fuck out, and I’m sorry. This shouldn’t have gone this far, but you can’t do this. You can’t give our baby to anyone else either. Yeah, we aren’t ready. Yeah, we are going at the speed of light and our lives don’t need a baby in them right now, but this,” he says, taking a step toward me and pressing his hands to my stomach, “is our child. My blood, your beautiful blood, together. A baby, Avery. Our baby.” Hiccupping a sob, I hold my hands over his as his eyes burn into mine. “Avery, I know we’re young, I know you think this could end, but it won’t. Call me cocky, but I know it won’t.”
“How, Jace—”
“Shh,” he demands, his eyes burning into mine. “I now know why I never loved before you, and that’s because I was waiting for you. You are the one and only woman I will ever love. My last first kiss. I know that because of what I feel when I look into your eyes. I’ve known since the moment I met you. I believe God has a plan for us, and while we thought we already had a plan, this is our plan now. Okay? I mean, do you get everything I’m saying? I know I’m talking a thousand miles a minute, and yeah, I can’t breathe, but Avery, I just fucking know. You’re it. You and our baby.”
A sob breaks free from my lips as I nod slowly and reach up, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Is this real?”
He grins, his hands wrapping around my waist. “Yeah.”
“But I thought you wouldn’t want this. It’s such a shocker.”
He nods. “A surprise, you mean. And no, I didn’t want this. It’s the last thing I would ever think of wanting right now. But now, after knowing, it’s all I want.”
I search his eyes for any inkling that he doesn’t, but all I see is love. Pure, unadulterated love. Still I have to ask, “Are you sure?”
“Are you?” he asks and my lip trembles, but I know the answer.
“I never wanted to end this.”
“Then why did you bring us here?”
“Because I was so scared.”