Kellen ushers me out and I’m in a daze. That was it, the wedding ceremony is over, just a few words in front of a sleepy old man, a tiny peck on the lips, and done, my entire life is forfeit to Kellen’s crazy plan. We walk out into the hall and the security guard gestures at the group.
“You folks can use this conference room,” the security guard says and opens a door halfway down the hall. “Go ahead and stay as long as you want, it’s available all morning, just give me a shout when you leave.” He disappears and Albert’s already sitting and plopping down a bunch of different pages.
I’m steered inside by Kellen and made to sit. I obey in a dizzy, half-awake daze.
“Now, this is the wedding certificate and all the county paperwork, we’ll need your signature on all of them and they’ll be backdated to avoid any pesky waiting period, and this is the contract that Kellen had me type up, I tried to make it as simple as possible, but—” He looks up at me and blinks a few times. “What’s wrong?”
I realize I’m crying. Fat tears drip onto the table in front of me and splatter on the contracts. I blink rapidly and quickly wipe my face, but then Kellen’s there, arm around my shoulders again.
“Give us a minute,” he says, and Albert and Finn both leave without having to be told twice. He looks at me, head tilted to the side, and takes a deep breath. “You’re going to freak the lawyer out.”
“Isn’t he the Hayle family lawyer? I’m sure he’s seen more than a few brides crying on their wedding day.”
Kellen doesn’t smile or laugh. He only watches me closely as I get myself under control and brush the tears from my cheeks, embarrassed that I couldn’t keep my feelings buried.
“This isn’t what you expected,” Kellen says almost apologetically.
“No, it’s not that, it’s only—” I suck in a breath. “I’m married. I never thought I’d be married. I never thought I’d live long enough let alone meet someone that would have me despite—” I gesture vaguely into the air.
He frowns deeply. “Do you really think you’re so damaged?”
“I think I’m a former heroin addict with a dead best friend and about a mile worth of baggage spread out over the years. I live in a cottage on the grounds of a mansion populated by people I hate and all I do is cut flowers and mow grass, which shouldn’t exist in Arizona by the way, but I waste obscene amounts of water. Anyway, who would marry me?”
Kellen looks at me seriously and puts his hands gently on my arms. “I would.”
“Because you need to. Doesn’t count.” I laugh once, sharply. “I didn’t mean to turn this into a pity party.”
“You’re entitled to your feelings.”
“Wow, that’s a first. Is that empathy?”
“Don’t get used to it.”
“Prick. I’m fine, really. Bring the lawyer back in. I’ll sign.”
He doesn’t move. He keeps looking at me, hands tight on my arms, and he takes a slow breath. “Did I ever tell you what my mother said to me the other day?”
“I don’t think so.”
“She said she remembers that I had a crush on you. Which is funny, because she doesn’t remember much else.”
I laugh a little and shake my head. “She must be confused.”
“She’s not.” He’s so close and big and strong and I feel a heady rush of uncertainty mixed with excitement. Kellen had a thing for me back in the day? I can’t begin to imagine it. He was always Cait’s big brother, the strong, aloof, handsome, mature older brother, entirely off limits, and anyway not interested in a gawky, awkward teen like me. And now I’m learning I was very wrong about that, which makes me wonder what else I’ve missed over the years.
“Why?” I manage to ask. “I mean, I was a mess back then.”
“You were,” he agrees and smiles when I get annoyed. “You were an addict, five years younger than me, and my sister’s best friend. You were the definition of off-the-fucking-limits. I kept my distance because I was a more stable human back then but it’s been years and I’m a real bastard these days and I can’t seem to get you out of my fucking head. I wanted you back then and I want you now. Yes, I need you, and yes, we’re using each other to get what we need, but that doesn’t change a thing. You’re worth fighting for. You always were. You just couldn’t see it.”
The bastard. I start crying again and he hugs me with a sigh, and I’m supposed to hate him right now, but suddenly he shows a little bit of humanity and I melt down like I’m clay in his hands. He can do whatever he wants with me right now because I’m basically his to have and hold and keep.
I’m claimed. And married.
“Now, you need to get it together,” he whispers and kisses my eyes and cheeks, cleaning the tears from my face. “Otherwise, Albert’s going to freak out. He’s already unhappy with this situation, and remember, he’s the family’s lawyer. Not mine.”
“Why use him then?”
“I want Hugh to hear all about this.” He smirks and brushes hair from my face before kissing my lips, slowly this time, deeper than in the judge’s chambers. “Pull it together and read this damn thing.” He shoves the contract into my hands. “I’ll be back in five with everyone else.”