Morgan’s heart went boom! again.
I am getting into trouble!
But she’d unpack that later. Right now, she wasn’t going to be a thirty-six-year-old woman with a tendency to overanalyze everything. Right now, she was going to be a thirty-six-year-old woman simply loving the fact that she was sitting on her sofa with her girlfriend who th
ought they were the perfect couple.
And that I can live with.
Chapter 37
“…and as the wisest lesbian I know, I figured you could help me sort this out. Because, seriously, I’m, like, really, really in need of some advice. And before you say what I know you’re going to say…Dude, it’s a compliment!”
“Okay, okay,” Vanessa sighed. “But I can’t possibly be the one to tell you if you’re falling in love. No one can tell you if you’re falling in love!”
They were in the parking lot behind La Vida Mocha. Chloë had just arrived to start her shift while Vanessa was on the way out.
“Fine, but let’s assume I am falling in love with her,” Chloë said.
“Which is amazing!”
“Yeah, sure, but…I mean, do you think it’s too soon?”
“Chloë, I can’t answer that! If you ask ten people on the street that question, you’ll get ten different answers!”
Chloë supposed Vanessa was correct about that. Who had the right to define what too soon is?
But last night, after her and Morgan were in bed, not having sex, just talking, Chloë had realized that she was falling in love with Morgan and most probably had been for at least a couple of weeks. Last night, however, was when it became crystal clear to her. And that clarity had occurred because Chloë had felt that simply being in bed with Morgan, talking, sharing, was something she could do for the rest of her life. And it made her happier than she had ever been. So happy, in fact, that Morgan had stopped telling the story of how she had gotten the scar on her elbow to ask what Chloë was smiling about.
“Nothing,” Chloë had lied and then kissed the tip of Morgan’s nose. “Just thinking about how much I’m enjoying being here with you.”
She knew she had let a golden opportunity slip by, the opportunity to tell Morgan how she felt, and maybe if Morgan had been her age, a woman not even twenty-five yet, Chloë would have blurted it out. But it was precisely because Morgan was older that Chloë had felt afraid to say the words. She already knew that Morgan kind of felt that she was a naïve young woman; their almost-argument earlier was proof of that, and so it was possible that Morgan would feel that Chloë—as a naïve young woman—was moving too fast.
“But do you think I should tell Morgan how I feel?” Chloë pressed Vanessa.
Sighing, Vanessa ran her fingers through her hair.
“Honestly? Yes.” Vanessa took hold of Chloë’s shoulders and looked her in the eye. “If your reality is that you love this woman, then you need to not hide that.”
Chloë nodded.
“Makes sense.”
“But…”
“But?” There was a but?
“But…you need to be prepared that she may not be on the same page as you yet,” Vanessa went on.
Shit!
“Everybody expects that when one person says ‘I love you,’ the other person says it right back,” Vanessa continued. “But that’s Hollywood bullshit.”
“Did Megan say it right back to you?”
“Well, yeah, but that was me and Megan. We’re talking about you and Morgan now and I’m saying that if Morgan asks you to pump the brakes a bit, don’t fall into an emotional tailspin.”
“Right. Got it.”