“Your mother tried to foist her preference on you. Sorry, I didn’t think of it before, but the next time I take you to the toy store, I’ll buy you a more diverse set of dolls. You’ll see they come in all shapes, skin colors, and hair textures, but they’re all equally beautiful.”

If he’d told me he hung the moon and stars in the sky, I would have believed him.

“I’d like that a lot. You still haven’t shown me how to use one of those card things to buy stuff online.”

Hunter ruffled my hair, kissed the back of my head, and laughed. “That’s because you have no idea the worth of money, Cosmo. I don’t want to be unable to provide you with the things you need because you spend all my money on toys.”

“You don’t have an endless supply, then?”

“Nobody has an endless supply, even though it seems that way. Like me, most people have to work, and that’s how we earn our money. We have to budget so we have enough to tide us over until the next pay month, and it’s always a good idea to save a little for a rainy day.”

“Virgil always had money. He would buy me all the things he thought I wanted.”

“But did he give you what you need?”

What did I need? Other than for this nightmare I was in to be over and for me to be free from my past. Free to carry out the one duty I had left to do. But what next? I’d never given it much thought before, but the more time I spent with Hunter, the more he was becoming what I needed.

“Daddy, how do you know for sure what you need?”

“Hmm, I’ve never thought of that before.”

“Oh.” I frowned. Hunter was the smartest person I knew who had all the experience I didn’t. If he didn’t have the answer, how could I?

“I guess you find out what you need when it becomes increasingly difficult to do without something. Like food. We may take it for granted because we eat it every day, but if it’s unavailable, it reminds us that we can’t live without it. We must have food. Without it, life would be miserable, or we could even die. So I guess, in a way, a need is tied to a realization there’s a part of us that needs to be filled. Make sense?”

“Yeah, it does. Thanks for explaining to me, Daddy.”

“You’re welcome, baby.” He kissed my temple and opened the fridge.

“Daddy, I have one more question.”

“Shoot.”

I giggled, and Daddy frowned at me over his shoulder. “Why the naughty giggle?”

“Because you said shoot.”

“You know what I mean. Ask your question.”

I bit my bottom lip and inhaled deeply, then let out the breath slowly. “Do you need me?”

Hunter’s indrawn breath was audible. I watched him, the way he fidgeted and glanced away from me. Twice he opened his mouth, but words failed to come out.

“With people,” he said as if choosing his words carefully, “it’s better to assess how much we desire or want someone. The second it crosses into need, the likelihood of that relationship being healthy plummets.”

“But do you need me?” I pressed. “Because I desire you. I want to be with you, but I also know it goes beyond that. Hunter, I need you to survive.” I made squiggly lines in the condensation on my glass of lemonade. “I depended on Virgil and Mother all my life, even when they were cruel to me. They didn’t teach me to expect or even hope there was something better. I accepted that was the way things had to be, rarely questioning it. Then Virgil betrayed me, and when the FBI caught me, I didn’t know how to survive, but then you came along, and I sensed you cared about me. Nobody else in the world looks at me like you do. Nobody else touches me like you do, brushes my hair, plays with me, feeds me, bathes me, talks to me, and holds me. And no one else makes love to me. I don’t just desire you, Hunter. I think I’ve needed you all my life because god knows, had I known your kind of care and love, things might have been different in my life.”

I slid down from the stool and took up the glass. Hunter didn’t seem as if he would be speaking anytime soon, and after spilling so much and making myself so vulnerable, I needed a minute alone.

“Daddy, can I watch TV while I finish my lemonade?”

He nodded, and I walked out, feeling his eyes boring into my back.

***

“Can I look now?”

Daddy had been in a thoughtful mood all day, but he hadn’t retreated behind the old mask of not caring about me. When he’d mentioned wanting to take me out for a date, I’d been thrilled, but all this suspense of dressing up without knowing for what occasion and him tying a blindfold over my eyes was killing me. I’d wanted to drag the blindfold off half an hour ago.

Tags: Gianni Holmes Dark
Source: readsnovelonline.net