“Trust me, if I thought there was even a sliver of a chance that he would let me have you I would do it in a heartbeat. But it just doesn’t work like that. Rossi has a zero policy on weaknesses. If he were to find out that you mean anything to me, he would kill you with a smile on his face.”
A small gasp escaped her lips. I know all of this probably scares her but everything I’m telling her is the truth. Maybe that makes me an asshole, or but I’d rather her know than have her assume I don’t want her at all.
“So you would keep me if you could?” I feel us moving closer and closer into uncharted waters. I’ve never wanted anything like I want Violet but confessing it makes me feel weak. And claiming her is only going to prove that further.
“I would help you… but I wouldn’t keep you even if I could.” Regret fills my body as soon as the words leave my lips and I see the pain of rejection in her eyes. I get up and turn away from her unable to look at her despair any longer. Telling her how I feel about her… how I would keep her forever if I could would only make things worse. It would make this already complicated situation much more complicated.
“You can stay here at night but you have to go back to your the cell during the day.” I hate it but this is the only thing I have left to offer her.
“Every night?” She asks, perking up a bit. Is sit down next to her on the bed and we angle our bodies so were looking at each other.
“If you want, yes.” She nods furiously at my offer, her eyes lighting up.
“I can come and get you after they bring you food at night, but I have to take you back before anyone notices in the morning.”
“Okay,” she whispers and forces a smile. I don’t know why I just now realize it, but she might be the bravest person I’ve ever known.
I have no doubt that she is scared shitless and she has every right to be. I wouldn’t hold it against her if she was screaming, kicking and crying every time I’ve left her in that cell, but she tries her very best to put on a brave face.
“Come on, let’s get some sleep.” I nudge her to scoot up and lie down but she stops me with a hand to the shoulder.
“What about you?” She looks down at the tent between my legs.
“Don’t worry about me. You don’t have to do anything,” I try to assure her. I don’t want to take anything else for her. She’ll indure enough in the weeks to come.
“But… I want to. I can do it like I did it the other day.” I nearly lose it right then and there. I want her so fucking bad, it hurts, it literally makes my body ache.
“Did you not like it… last time in the shower?” There’s a frown on her lips, and I want to kiss it away. I want to scream from the rooftops how much I fucking loved her tiny hand on my cock, stroking the life out of me.
“Of course, I did.” I shake my head, her brow furrowed in confusion and I know I need to better explain myself simply from the look on her face, “I just don’t want you to feel like you have to do something for me, like you’re re-paying me or something. You don’t owe me anything. I would do this stuff for you even if you didn’t give me a hand job, or let me touch you.”
But I would only ever do it for you.
“I really want to do it,” her voice is low but determined and then as if she think she’s strong she takes her tiny hand, and places it on my shoulder, pushing against me in a feeble attempt to get me to lie down. Her small attempt at making me do what she wants me to do has me chuckling.
“Please? I just want to make you feel as good as you made me feel.” She peers up at me, her eyes wide, and looking for acceptance. I lick my lips, knowing I’m going to tell her yes. It’s a losing fucking battle when it comes to telling her no.
“Fine.” I grit my teeth, scooting back up the mattress before lying down, with my hands behind my head. I feel her eyes move over me as she kneels beside me on the bed. She dips her fingers into the waistband of my boxers and pulls them down over my thighs, once the fabric passes my cock it springs free. Violet seems much more sure of herself this time and I want to tell her how sexy it is, how fucking happy I am that her perfect hands, want to touch such a bad, fucked up person like me.