Without Regret (Pyte/Sentinel 2)

“I’m sorry.”

“Well, you should be. I asked you to stay out of this. You know this is between me and Chris. It has-“

“No, not that,” Joshua said, shaking his head slowly.

“Then for what?”

He sighed heavily as he picked up both of their trays.

“You’ll see.”

Chapter 44

“I didn’t break it, did I?” he heard his father snap.

“No, but you promised not to touch anything!” Joshua shot back and he would have laughed if he was scared out of his f**king mind at the moment.

It was truly frightening how one moment of clarity could change his whole outlook. Not even an hour ago he’d been prepared to live a life of hell without his mate and then one word changed all of that.

Jessica.

He’d tried so hard not to think of the baby, so f**king hard. Hearing his little girl’s name was the kick in the balls that he needed. He started to picture a little face to go along with the name and he couldn’t imagine not being there to hold her, love her, help her and guide her in this world. Now he just prayed his little Munchkin would give him a chance, otherwise he’d be doomed to a life of watching from afar.

Where he’d failed to secure a safe home for his mate and child, his father and Eric had succeeded. Judging by the pictures and security details Eric just sent him they’d more than succeeded. The mansion’s security was a hundred times better than the compound’s and that was saying a hell of a lot. The property was gated, monitored, and unbelievably beautiful.

He couldn’t believe this, couldn’t believe how badly this situation had become f**ked up. Here he was pushing his mate away thinking it was the best thing for everyone and his goddamn family had not only been embracing her, but doing their damndest to secure her future and happiness and what the f**k had he been doing?

He’d been an ass**le.

Now he was coming back to the mate he treated like shit and praying like hell she would give him another chance. As far as the baby was concerned he was still scared shitless, but he wanted to see her. God, he wanted to see her so badly that it hurt to breathe.

He walked into the clinic and spotted his family all standing around Izzy as she laid on a hospital gurney as Joshua glided a small plastic tool connected by a wire to a large machine over her glistening stomach.

His lips twitched despite his nervousness as he watched his father reach out to take the tool away from Joshua only to have his hand slapped away by several people.

“I was just curious!”

“Well stop, we’re trying to see,” Jill said, smiling at whatever she saw on the small monitor by Izzy’s feet.

“What’s that?” Marc asked, squishing up his face as he turned his head to get a better look at whatever was on the screen.

“That’s her hand,” Joshua said, gliding the tool over Izzy’s stomach. “And if she turns just so…….we’ll see her face.”

“Oh my god,” Madison said, smiling hugely.

He was across the room in seconds, unable to stay away much longer. His father saw him and threw him a relieved smile as he stepped out of the way. After months of yelling at him and pleading with him to give Izzy a chance he knew how relieved his father had to be.

Taking a deep breath and praying that he wouldn’t f**k up this little girl’s life the way his mother had f**ked up his, he took a step forward and fell head over heels in love for the second time in his life.

There on the screen was his little girl, his Jessica. In that moment he knew there would be no walking away from her. He’d give his life up for her in a heartbeat.

“Aw, she’s so cute,” Jill gushed and he had to agree.

“When can we see the boys?” Madison asked.

“In about a month it should be easier to spot them,”

Joshua said.

“Excellent,” his father said to no one’s surprise.

“Do you want a picture of your daughter, Chris?”

Joshua asked.

He couldn’t remove his eyes from the screen as he nodded. “Please. Two, please.” He’d put one in his wallet and have Madison frame the other one to put by his bed.

“They’re printing now. Jill, could you hand me a few wipes so that I can wipe this goop off of Izzy’s stomach?”

Joshua asked, but before Jill could reach for the box of warmed wipes he had them in his hands.

Praying his hands wouldn’t shake and give away how nervous he was, he pulled a few wipes out and began wiping Izzy’s large stomach. He nearly gasped when he felt his daughter move.

“I can do that,” Izzy said, moving to take the wipes away, but he wasn’t having that.

“Let me do it,” he said, wanting to do something for her, anything. He’d been such an ass**le. Why the hell did he keep f**king up around her?

“Why don’t we all give them some space? Chris, Izzy, I’ll drop the pictures off in your suite,” Joshua said, reaching out and giving Izzy’s hand a small squeeze before he walked away.

“Chris, I really can do that,” Izzy said, sounding embarrassed.

“I know, but I want to,” he said, giving her a small smile before focusing his attention back on her stomach.

After he wiped all the clear gel off her stomach he gently ran his hands over it, chuckling every time his baby girl pushed against his hands. She was such a little feisty little thing, he thought as he leaned over and pressed a kiss to Izzy’s stomach and of course that earned a kick from his baby girl.

“Chris, you have to stop,” Izzy said.

“Look, I’m sorry I f**ked up, more than you’ll ever know, but I want to try, Izzy,” he said, smiling when his little girl double kicked his hand.

“It’s not that,” she mumbled miserably.

“Then what is it?” he asked, unable to take his eyes away from her round stomach.

“If you must know all this kicking and pressure is making me have to pee!” she said, shoving his hands as she did her best to roll over and sit up. As gently as he could he helped her to her feet and tried not to smile when she threw him a glare and began waddling towards the hallway door.

“Where are you going? I thought you had to use the bathroom?” he called after her.

“I like using our bathroom,” he thought he heard her mutter. “Besides I also need to soak in a hot tub and I don’t care if I’m late for your precious defense class. It’s not like I’ve been able to do anything more than sit in a corner for the past two months anyway,” she snapped testily.