Secrets & Submission

“If I let myself fall for him and then … something happens and he’s gone …” I can barely get the words out. It’s the first time I’ve said it out loud. “I can’t go through that again.”

Kam’s answer strikes me hard, although his voice is nearly a whisper. “What happened to James was an accident, Ella.”

“I know. I know.”

“It was a fucking tragedy,” Trish adds.

“You deserve to be happy,” Kam tells me with a gentle firmness. “He makes you happy, doesn’t he?”

“He does,” I answer.

“And he loves you,” Trish points out.

“He does,” I say with a simper, letting the warmth flood me. Not fighting it and knowing it’s true. He does.

“You love him?” Trish asks.

“I do.”

Kam steps in, placing a hand on each of my shoulders and says, “Then be happy. For fuck’s sake, Ella, be happy. That’s all anyone wants and you never know when it’s all going to change. One moment and everything falls. We’ve seen it so many times. We recover, we always do. I will always make sure you get back up. But you’re up, babe. You can be happy now. I promise you.”