“Babe, I’ve told you everything you need to know.”
Need to know? She looked to the ceiling of the old barn and prayed for strength. “Look, I might be able to borrow some money from my dad. But you have to tell me the truth, Jeb. Why so much?”
He laughed, a grating sound that was devoid of even an ounce of mirth. “I’ve gotta get out, Rai. Disappear and never come back. That costs.”
Disappear? Never come back? Heck, if she believed—even for one minute—that he’d never be back it would be worth paying him what he was asking. To think that she wouldn’t have to be wondering and waiting when the next call or visit would come. The next demand for more money. But what on earth had he done that was so bad?
“Forever?” she asked, the word slipping from her mouth before she even realized she’d said it.
“Aw, Rai, don’t tell me you’re gonna miss me. Or is it maybe that you really don’t want to see me ever again?”
Raina shuddered. He was back to playing his word games, twisting everything around, including her, until she didn’t know which way was up anymore.
“How much? Tell me, Jeb. Exactly how much do you need?”
He named a sum that had her rocking back on her heels. “I can’t do that.”
“That’s what it’s gonna take, Rai baby. And I need it by tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” She couldn’t get that kind of cash together by tomorrow and she doubted that even if her dad was prepared to lend her the money he could either. Besides, tomorrow was JJ’s pageant. She didn’t want Jeb anywhere near her or her son on what was a very important day for her little boy. “That’s far too soon! Give me a few days.”
“I don’t have a few days.” Jeb’s tone became more urgent and a shiver of fear trickled down Raina’s spine. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Look out for me.”
With that he hung up, leaving Raina staring at her phone and shaking. How on earth had she ever let things get to this? She should have drawn the line on being his cash cow years ago, but somehow it had always been easier just to pay him and send him on his way.
Raina stared at her phone and knew she had to do this. She dialed her father’s number. He answered on the second ring.
“Dad, I need your help.”
Eleven
Raina had been on tenterhooks all day. Her father, bless him, had come to see her at the store earlier in the day with a wad of bills. That he’d done such a thing, even knowing that the money was for Jeb, filled her heart with gratitude. No matter what happened in her life, she had him as her rock. When her mother had abandoned her, he’d been there. When Jeb had abandoned her, he’d been there. Every minute of every day that she needed him. But he wasn’t getting any younger and it was time she was that rock for him, not the other way around. She needed to be able to stand on her own two feet.
And then there was the anxiety of carrying several thousand dollars in cash on her person for the rest of the day. Every time someone had come into the store and set the bell above the door ringing, she’d virtually jumped out of her skin. By the time she’d closed up shop and headed home, her nerves had been stretched so taut she felt as if the slightest thing would see her fracture into a million pieces.
“Mommy! Mommy! Look, I’m Spider-Man!” JJ zoomed around the house in his costume, looking like no shepherd any children’s pageant had ever seen.
“JJ, we’ve talked about this. You can’t be Spider-Man in the pageant,” she said wearily and with an edge to her voice that JJ didn’t miss.
“I am, Mommy. I am!”
His face took on a petulant look that reminded her all too much of his father, and Raina was hard pressed to remind herself not to visit her frustrations over Jeb’s sins upon JJ. She had to pick her battles.
“How about you be Spider-Man in the car and then a shepherd when we get to the hall?”
“Spider-Man!” JJ shouted and hopped on one foot.
“C’mon,” Raina said, fighting to hold on to her temper. “Let’s get your coat on. If we don’t go soon we’ll be late.”
By the time she had them both bundled up and in the car her hands were shaking. She took in several steadying breaths before putting the car in Reverse and backing out of the drive, all the time keeping an eye out for Jeb. But he was nowhere to be seen. She didn’t know whether to be relieved or sorry.