* * *
“I don’t like you living there again, Sam.”
Sam rubbed his forehead and sank onto the bench he’d built into the deck off the back porch. Marley rode her bike on the driveway and along the sidewalk around the garage. His mother had called to check on her granddaughter and wasted no time in expressing her opinion on the situation.
“This is my family, Mom. I shouldn’t be anywhere else.”
“That woman didn’t stand by you when you needed her and now you’re back in her house.”
“It’s still our first house and she pushed me away for good reasons.” He defended Tara. “She had to look out for herself and our daughter. If she hadn’t, I don’t know that I would’ve sought the help I needed.”
His mom merely grunted before diving in for more. “You can stay in your apartment and still care for your daughter. She knows you love her.”
“We’re going on the doctor’s orders.” How many times had he already said that to her via texts and calls? “If you’d like to visit, you’re more than welcome. Marley would love to see you.”
“I plan on coming this weekend,” his mom stated. “I didn’t want to overwhelm her.”
“You won’t overwhelm her. She’s acting like Marley.” He watched as she wobbled around the garage once again with the purple bike that she’d gotten for Christmas last year. Apparently her memory had stolen the fact she had become an excellent rider. “She’s had some headaches off and on, but that’s to be expected. She has no idea she’s missing such a large portion of her life.”
He hoped the memories would return slowly and not overwhelm her all at once. When she’d woken this morning and seen him on her floor for the second night in a row, he simply explained that he’d slept in her room to keep an eye on her since her fall. The statement wasn’t a complete lie. He did want to constantly watch over his little girl, but he also wanted to sleep in bed with his wife. At some point, he’d have to go into the master suite to keep up the pretense.
He wasn’t going to dodge his feelings for Tara and he wasn’t going to let her avoid hers, either. They were going to have to be honest and lay everything out in an attempt to move forward. Even though they weren’t together, and wouldn’t be when this was over, Sam still had to be completely open. Just another hard life lesson he’d learned.
Tara stepped out the back door and a big bundle of fur flew by Sam. Daisy loved the big, fenced-in yard. She ran around in circles, fur flying, tongue flapping. Sam knew Tara wasn’t too pleased with him over the massive dog, but damn it, his heart had been in the right place. Didn’t that count for something? Maybe he hadn’t made the smartest decisions in his life, but he didn’t regret putting a smile on his daughter’s face.
“I’ll talk to you later, Mom.”
He disconnected the call and came to his feet, shoving his cell into his pocket. Tara stood at the edge of the deck and stared out across the yard toward the garage where Marley continued to make circles. She giggled when Daisy ran along beside her.
Sam crossed the yard and stepped up onto the deck he’d built only two years ago. “I’m sleeping in our room tonight.”
The words were out of his mouth before he could think them through, but he was done pretending. He had to pretend with his daughter; he at least wanted to be real with his wife.
Tara continued to stare out into the yard, keeping her profile to him. “Lucy and Emma are on their way over for a visit.”
Sam raked a hand along his stubbled jawline. “Did you hear me?”
Glancing over her shoulder, she merely raised a brow. “I heard you, Sam. What do you want me to say?”
He had no clue what he wanted her to say because he was in a whole new element here. But damn it, couldn’t she acknowledge the issue between them? Of all people, he didn’t expect her to dodge the topic. Didn’t therapists make people face their fears and talk?
“I don’t want this to be difficult,” he told her.
She returned her attention to the yard. “It’s going to be difficult no matter what we do.”