“That’s not—”
“But for the next nineteen years, you’re going to have to deal with me.” Her eyes began to water, and a few tears slipped from her eyes. “I’m sorry for that. I’m so, so sorry. But we have to figure out a way to make this work because, for better or worse, I’m here, and it’s exhausting trying to get along with you.”
Kate turned to walk away, and my stomach clenched.
“Why do you always do that?” I asked in irritation. “You never let me say anything before you’re walking away.”
“I know what you have to say, Shane. You’ve already said it, remember? I’m just saving us both from words you can’t take back.”
“All you’re doing is pissing me off!” I called as she started walking again.
“That’s just a bonus,” she called back quietly.
I scratched my head in frustration, growling deep in my throat before perching my cover on top of my head and walking out the front door.
She was so fucking irritating. She acted like I was such a dick, and though I could remember vividly the times that I had been, there were far more times over the past year that things had been just fine between us. Had we ever been best friends? Not really. But that didn’t make me a dick.
And the fact that she kept saying I didn’t like her pissed me off. I’d never said I didn’t like her. She was fine. Likable. She just wasn’t someone I wanted to hang out with in what little spare time I had. That didn’t make me a dick, either.
I couldn’t understand why she just kept pushing at me. Did she want me to fall on my knees and ask her to be best friends forever? Because that was never going to happen.
But I had never, not once, acted like she had to walk on eggshells.
That was complete and utter bullshit.
We had the kids in common. That was it. I wasn’t going to pretend that I thought she was interesting or sexy or fun. That wouldn’t be fair to her, and frankly, it would just fuck things up worse than they already were.
* * *
The house was noisy as I stepped in the front door that night after a long-ass day at work. I’d been checking and rechecking lists all day, running back and forth all over the base trying to get shit ready for the deployment that was slowly closing in. God, I was tired. Tired and in a pissy mood.
“You’re doing awesome, Sage!” Kate’s voice rose above the clatter of pans Gavin and Gunner were playing with on the floor. “Make sure you’re cutting through all the way to the counter, okay?”
Keller was silent for the first time in a long time, building something with Legos at the kitchen table, and Kate was moving around Sage as she cut biscuits out of the dough on the counter with what looked like an empty can of corn.
“Something smells really good,” I announced, setting my keys and wallet on the counter.
“We made stew, huh, Sage?” Kate said with a shy smile. “It was kind of cold out today, and I felt like some comfort food.”
“Are those Ellie’s biscuits?” I asked, my mouth watering at the thought.
“Yep, and my mom’s beef stew recipe.”
“Holy hell. When’s it ready?” I asked, unbuttoning my uniform top. I wanted to peel off my uniform and get into some basketball shorts and a T-shirt that didn’t smell like sweat, pronto.
“Um,” Kate stuttered as she watched my fingers, and I became aware of my heart thumping hard in my chest. “Like twenty minutes,” she finally answered.
“I’m gonna take a shower first then.”
“Okay.”
She was still staring, and I don’t know if it was the stress of the day or what, but suddenly I wanted her out of the kitchen and away from the four rugrats that were making so much noise.
“Can I talk to you for a sec?” I asked, tilting my head to the side.
“Sure. Hey, Sage, hop down, would you? I’ll be back in a minute.”
Kate made sure Sage was away from the counter and grabbed Gunner off the floor, setting him in the playpen filled with toys between the kitchen and the living room before following me into the hall and up the stairs.
When we got to my room, I wiggled and stretched my shoulders, trying to get the tight sleeves of my uniform off my biceps. That was the trouble with having tightly rolled-up sleeves; they were so tight, they were a pain in the ass to get off.
I felt her fingers slide between my skin and the fabric of my sleeves, and stopped moving completely as she yanked first one sleeve and then the other down my arms.
Her breathing was little off, kind of heavy and shuddery at the same time, and the feel of it on my shoulder was the straw that broke the camel’s back.