She stared at him, her voice stuck somewhere in her throat.
‘So...’ he paused and she could tell he was nervous ‘... I decided that actions speak louder than words. That’s why I’ve packed everything up. Magda is due back at work and we’ve got a locum for the next few months.’ He shook his head. ‘The irony of doing the show is that we had about twenty people apply. So...’ he met her gaze ‘...if you’re willing to talk, if you’re willing to give things a try, just tell me. Tell me where your next job is, and this time I’ll come to you. Because I love you, Kristie. I’ll love you to the ends of this earth.’
She stared at him. Trying to take in his words. ‘You’d move here? To be with me?’
‘Of course. I’d do anything for you, Kristie—whatever it takes.’
She sagged back a little further into the sofa, then turned her head to face him. His words were swimming around her brain—the enormity of them. Her heart was swelling inside her chest. Those tiny fragments of doubt that had dashed through her mind when he’d made the suggestions about moving had evaporated. She raised one eyebrow, curiously. ‘What makes you think I don’t like Arran?’
He shot her a suspicious glance and counted off on his fingers. ‘Er...maybe the weather. The ferries. Or lack of them. No supermarkets, no malls.’
She leaned towards him. ‘Maybe I like all that. Maybe I like waking up in a place where the view changes daily. Maybe I like a place where most people know each other’s names.’
He sat forward. It was obviously not what he was expecting to hear and she could see the hopeful glint in his eyes. ‘Can I have more than five minutes?’ he whispered.
She licked her lips and took a breath. If this was real, if she wanted this to be real, she had to be truthful—she had to put all her cards on the table.
‘I’ve been angry these last few days. Angry with myself and angry with you. When I came to Arran I wanted to tell you that I loved you too. And when you told me first, then added about how it was all crazy and we could never work...it was like giving me part of my dream then stealing it all away again.’
He grimaced.
‘I wanted you to ask, Rhuaridh. I wanted you to do exactly what you’re here to do now, for me, without the big gesture. All I wanted you to do was to ask me to stay. To ask me to choose you, and to choose Arran.’
He blinked, a mixture of confusion and relief sweeping over his face. ‘I thought that would be selfish. Conceited even, to ask you to give everything up.’
‘Just like what you’ve done for me now?’ She held her hands out toward his cases.
He let out a wry laugh and shook his head, reaching over to intertwine his fingers with hers. ‘It seems that we both crossed our wires when we were really heading for parallel paths.’
She gave a slow nod of her head. ‘I want you to know that I’ve made a decision.’
He straightened a little. ‘What kind of decision?’
‘A take-a-chance-on-everything life, love, career decision.’
He opened his mouth to speak but she held up her hand. ‘I love you, Rhuaridh. The whole world could see it before I could. I started to dream about getting on that ferry, reaching Arran and never leaving again. I’ve started to like rain. And I definitely love snow. And my job?’ She pulled a face and held up her hands. ‘It used to be everything, but it’s not been that for a long time. Not since Jess died. My family died. Not since I started volunteering at the helpline.’ She looked at him nervously. ‘I’ve had enough of TV. No matter what they offer me right now, the only offer I’m going to take is the book deal.’
‘You have a book deal?’ His eyes widened. ‘That’s brilliant!’
She looked up into his eyes. ‘You gave me the push I needed, you made me write the book in my heart. And you were right. There’s been a bidding war. The publishers love it.’
He stopped for a second and tilted his head. ‘Is that the only offer you’re going to take?’
She licked her lips. ‘That depends.’
‘Depends on what?’ He’d shifted forward, it was like he was hanging on her every word. Funny, handsome, grumpy, loyal Rhuaridh—her own Scotsman—was hanging on her words.