In a rush, everything she says hits me with a force so strong I’m fighting for air. My chest and stomach seize at the same time, and I grip the edge of the counter for support.
That day with Evin…
“Answer the damn question, Evin. Is Darby all right?”
“You don’t deserve answers. Stay away from her and let my family do what we need to do.”
“What the fuck does that mean?”
“It means you did enough damage to last a lifetime, and everyone that loves her suffered. We’re going to do what we need to do to bring her back. You do not get to ruin this for my family.”
The conversation in the bakery…
“I left here in tatters, Pierce. Broken, ashamed, hollow, and I went away for a reason. My brother drove up to Charlotte to break the news of her pregnancy. I found myself back in shambles. Then our dear, darling friend, Connie, followed the southern etiquette protocol and sent me a personal birth announcement—to my parents’ house. She was kind enough to repeat the action a mere sixteen months later.”
“You have got to be shitting me.”
“No. So you don’t get to play the pity card because I do know a goddamned thing that happened to you. You got together with the one bitch in our group of friends that openly disrespected our relationship. I wasn’t gone fourteen weeks before she was having your baby.”
“I’m gonna kill her.”
“Why? Why be mad now? You have the children you always wanted, and from what I hear, they are perfect kids.”
“Leave my kids out of this.”
“Fine. I didn’t leave your ass in the dust and skip the town that I love easily. I was coming back—and I was prepared to beg, explain what happened. There was a sliver of hope that you’d understand.”
“Understand what, Darby? What you did to me was unforgivable.”
“You’re right. It was unforgivable. I was selfish and focused only on myself. But believe me when I tell you that I paid the price. There was no way for me to come back here and watch the man I thought I was going to marry living out his dream with a woman I could no longer stand. And that also tells you why I didn’t make a big deal about being back. I’m still not sure I can live in the same town. You came in here wanting some answers, and you’ve got them.”
Stephanie’s warning…
“You let her go, Pierce. She needed you more than anything, and you let her go.”
“You have no fucking idea what happened.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. I know everything. I’m warning you now; when she tells you her story, you’re going to be in your own pit of hell.”
Edward’s visit…
“I’ll tell you this. Darby left you for a good reason. A reason Annie and I supported one hundred percent. Evin wanted to go with her, and we practically had to tie him down to stop him from smothering her. She went away to get help.”
“You’re a dad now, so I know you get the protective burn that runs through your veins when you think about your children hurting.”
“I do.”
“Then you’ll understand that I’ve had that burn scorching through me for a very long time. Not a day goes by that I don’t want to strip that pain from my daughter.”
“No offense, but you need to remember what happened back then.”
“I know what happened. All of it. Every word exchanged, every tear that fell, every cry of regret, and even every drink you consumed to try to run from the heartbreak.”
Every word that Darby, Evin, Stephanie, and Edward said replays in my brain and slams into me like a hammer to the heart. It all makes sense. Years of hatred and blame seep out of my soul, and shame washes through me. Stephanie was right. So was my mom. I did let Darby go when I should have gone after her. She fucking needed me.
I rip my hands through my hair, feeling the blood pounding through my veins. I can’t stop the rage that takes over, and I twist, throwing a fist through the wall. Self-hatred fuels me, and I explode in a roar. “You should have come back to me!”
She wraps her arms around herself defensively, and I realize how much of a madman I am right now. My whole body is shaking, and I need to check myself before I do something I’ll regret.
Deep breaths, in and out. I clench my fists a few times then force myself to drop my hands to my sides. “You should have come back to me,” I repeat.
“I couldn’t. You were no longer mine.”
“I was always yours.”
“You were sleeping with the enemy! How can you say that?”
“There was no sleeping involved. I fucked her! I fucked her hard and fast. She was on her knees, face to the bed so I didn’t have to look at her. Blew my load, went and sucked back a fifth of bourbon, and did it again. The second time, I made her face a wall, stick out her ass, and keep quiet. She wanted to suck my dick, so I let her. It was a way to dull the pain. No kissing, no foreplay, no feelings.”