I shake my head. “He’s checking out your ass.”
“Must be disappointed I’m into women.”
“Hard to blame him.”
He pulls back with a smile. “Oh?”
My blush spreads to my chest. Oh my God. Did I really say that?
It’s…
Okay, it’s a little embarrassing. But the way Holden is looking at me.
God, I really like the way he’s looking at me.
I clear my throat. “I just mean…”
“Go on.”
“You’re a very attractive man.”
“And…”
“Lots of people want you. You know that.”
“Maybe.” He slides his arm around me. Holds up the card of condoms. “Can we bring this upstairs? Or should we pay first?”
The guy nods go for it.
Holden leads me up the stairs. He stays a pace behind me.
Checking out my ass.
I think.
I’m pretty sure.
He wants me. Even if he’s not willing to act on it, he does want me.
He knows it.
I know it.
He knows I know it.
I know he knows it.
I just don’t know what to do about it.
Chapter Thirteen
Holden
I’m an idiot.
Lacking self-control.
Unable to push my dick out of the driver’s seat.
Fuck, this is going to kill me. I’m going to collapse at this table from pent-up frustration.
Is this how Daisy lives?
It’s exhausting.
I try to pry my eyes from her soft pink lips. They’re wrapped around a glass. She’s sucking cocoa nib infused cold brew into her mouth.
Fuck, I want to be that cold brew.
I’ve never wanted to be coffee before.
An hour alone with her and I’m already going crazy.
An hour of failing to stop myself from blurting out the dirty thoughts in my head. Well, some of them.
You want to find out how those condoms taste, baby? Come here. As long as I can taste you first—
Goddammit.
Her throat quivers as she swallows. She pushes the drink across the table. Back to me. “It’s a lot.”
I nod yeah. “Good though.”
“I knew you weren’t a tea person.”
“Didn’t have a chance to make your chai.” I take a long sip of cold brew. The addition of chocolate is subtle, but it’s enough to make this drink fucking good. I’m not usually a coffee person. I’ve added enough cream and simple syrup to prove it—what can I say, I don’t like bitter tastes?
But, fuck, there’s something about the rich chocolate flavor.
The blue eyes fixed on me.
The flushing cheeks—
Not going there. Uh-huh. No way.
This icy drink is sending coolness through my body. It’s calming my cock. That’s a theoretical possibility.
Daisy picks up a chocolate-covered strawberry. Brings it to her lips. Takes a tiny bite.
Her eyelids flutter closed.
Her brow softens.
Her chest heaves.
I try to find coldness in the light brown of my milky coffee. I don’t, but at least it keeps me from staring at her.
“These are good.” She lets out a soft groan. “This was a good idea.”
“I’m a genius.”
Her eyes meet mine. Her lips curl into a smile. “It’s… I really do appreciate your help.”
“I aim to please.”
Her smile gets wider. And somehow softer too. “You do.”
“Oh?”
She nods yeah. “Are you going to pretend otherwise?”
“Fuck no.”
“Not just with sex. Though I’m sure you do…” She brings the fruit to her mouth. Sinks her teeth into its flesh.
Red juice dribbles over her lips.
She sucks the berry into her mouth. Licks her lips. Wipes a drop with her thumb. Chews. Swallows. “Do you?”
“Do I what?”
She copies my easy tone. “Aim to please.”
“When I fuck?”
Her eyes go wide. Her blush deepens. “Yeah.” Her voice is quiet. Not timid exactly. More overwhelmed.
She is shy.
Uptight.
Completely and totally into me.
Which doesn’t matter.
I’m looking out for her.
Helping her.
Even if it kills me.
No, I’m stronger than that. I can listen to her groan over chocolate without dying.
I can help her find someone else. If that’s really what she wants. If she’s here to punch her v-card—
I can’t find a way to like it.
But I can do it.
“Holden?” Her fingers brush mine as she hands me a chocolate-covered strawberry. “If you don’t want to talk about sex, I understand.”
“Is that another dare?”
She shakes her head. “I know you better than that.”
I arch a brow.
She lets out a soft laugh. “I could dare you all day.” She leans back. Tries to copy my easy posture. Well, my usual easy posture.
At the moment, I’m tenser than she is.
Fuck, do people really live like this? With desire winding them so tight they could burst?
It fucking sucks.
No wonder Forest was so moody before he and Skye got together. I’m ready to hit someone, throw something, down the nearest bottle.
Fuck the nearest stranger.
Not that my heart will allow it.
Fucking A. It’s just as unwilling to let my head in the driver’s seat.
My cock keeps screaming fuck her.
My heart keeps screaming whatever you do, don’t hurt her.
My head—
I can barely hear the damn thing.
She tries to imitate me. “Holden, it’s okay if you can’t handle talking about sex. I wouldn’t want you to feel embarrassed.” Her voice is halfway between her usual tone—straightforward and shy—and something light and teasing. “It’s okay if you don’t have the self-control.”