Fuck, her ass is divine.
“Am I okay?” she asks.
“What?” Okay? Okay doesn’t begin to describe it.
I need that ass in my lap. In my hands. Against my pelvis as I fuck her from behind.
I need her bending over.
I need her begging me to split her in half.
“Do you want me?” She turns, so we’re face-to-face. “Do you want to fuck me?”
“Yes.”
“Would you?”
“Would I?”
“If I asked?”
My cock whines for attention. It steals all the blood from my brain. Steals the last bit of judgment I have left. “I might.”
“I don’t want to manipulate you.” Her tongue slides over her lips. “I just want… I want to want, I guess. To feel wanted. To feel normal. For one night.”
“How are you not—”
She takes another step toward me. “Can I?”
Conscious thought flees my brain at an alarming rate. Whatever it is she wants to do, the answer is yes. I nod.
She places her hands on my shoulders. Slides into my lap.
Slowly, her body sinks into mine.
“Fuck.” Her breath is heavy. Needy. “That feels so good.”
I wrap my arms around her.
“You… uh… you’re hard.”
“You’re naked.” I need to defuse the tension. To pull this back to humor. But it’s not enough. I still want her so much I can’t stand it.
Her laugh is awkward. “I, uh… it’s been a long time. I haven’t… I haven’t felt that since—”
“Since when?” Whoever he is, I’m going to kill him.
“This guy sophomore year.” Her fingers curl into my neck. “It feels good. I forgot.”
“Daisy—”
“You’re the only person who helps me remember.” Her eyes bore into mine. “You’re just… I really like you, Holden.”
“I like you too.”
“I mean… like you like you.”
“I know.”
Her fingers curl into my neck. She stares into my eyes, stares all the way to my fucking soul. “I know you don’t do relationships. I just want… I want whatever you’re willing to give me.” She shifts her hips.
Fuck, that feels good. My hands go to her hips reflexively.
Her chest heaves with her exhale. “I don’t know if I’ll ask again. I can barely ask now. But, I, uh—if you want me to stop—”
“Fuck no.”
“So you…”
“Come here.” One hand slides to her lower back. The other goes to the back of her head.
Her arms hook around my neck.
Her eyelids flutter together.
I pull her into a slow, deep kiss.
Her lips brush mine.
Softly.
Then harder.
She tastes good. Like chocolate and bourbon.
Like heaven.
Like Daisy.
I wait for my brain to argue. For judgment to kick in. For some part of me to want anything other than her mouth against mine.
But it doesn’t.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Daisy
Kissing Holden isn’t like kissing other guys.
He’s more steady. More sure.
He leads and I follow.
He scrapes his teeth against my bottom lip.
He presses his palm into my lower back.
He holds my body against his.
Fuck, I’m naked in his lap.
It’s a neon sign in my head.
Naked. In. His. Lap.
I’ve never been naked with a guy before.
But I’m not scared. I’m nervous as all hell, but I’m not scared.
I trust him. Probably more than I should.
God, he tastes good.
He pulls back enough to look up at me.
It’s too much. I can’t hold his gaze.
My eyes go to his chest. The tattoo peeking out from his t-shirt.
“Fuck, Daisy.” He cups the back of my head with his hand. “Are you sure?”
“Sure of what?”
“This.” He shifts his hips so his hard-on presses against my sex. “I don’t trust myself to stop if you keep going.” His voice is honest. Sincere. The most sincere I’ve ever heard it.
I nod. “Please.” I dig my fingers into his neck. “I need you.”
“Fuck.” His pupils dilate. “Daisy—”
“I love that you’re being a gentleman. But I don’t want that. I want to feel you, Holden. Please. Give me this.”
“You know how this ends?” His breath is strained, like he’s struggling to hold on to conscious thought.
“I’m leaving for college in less than two weeks. I just want… this trip.”
“Are you sure?”
No. Not even a little. “Yeah.”
“Fuck.” His hand slides to my hip. “I really want to make you come.”
My response is a groan.
“You have no idea how much I think about it.”
“When?”
“Every fucking night. And every morning. Every shower.” He runs his fingers over my hips. “You’ve been wearing me out for weeks.”
My sex clenches. “I think about you too.”
His fingers trail around my neck, over my shoulders, down my collarbone.
To my chest.
He cups my breast with his palm. “You touch yourself?”
My cheeks flame. “Yes.”
“Show me.”
“Here?”
“Yeah.”
“This first.” I’m not sure what this is. Only that I need it desperately.
He looks up at me with every ounce of desire in the world. It’s crystal clear. He wants me. Holden Ballard, the sexiest man in the universe, a man who can attract the attention of any woman, wants me.
His eyelids flutter together.
Mine follow.
He kisses me hard. Like he needs every ounce of me.
Maybe he does. Maybe he needs this as much as I do. Maybe he’s as empty as I am. Maybe he’s just better at hiding it.