“You can’t have my pickle,” I warned.
“I wouldn’t dream of risking it,” he said, taking another chip and eating it. “So don’t tell me you don’t have a visiting nurse or anything checking on Donnie during the day. You can’t do both jobs at the same time. Not even you can be two places at once.”
I shook my head, finished chewing, “Insurance won’t pay for a home health care worker, not even twice a week. So it’s me.”
“Have you called the church secretary? June might know somebody who’d help out.”
“I don’t think so. We pretty much stopped going to church when my mother passed away, and I wouldn’t want to impose on them. Rema said if there was anything she could do, to let her know, but that’s just something people say. I don’t think she wants to come babysit my dad and make him drink water and go to physical therapy.”
“Give her a chance to help out, Sarah Jo. Call her up and ask if she knows anybody who’d check in on him in the afternoons. There’s no way you can handle everything yourself.”
“Ryan’s helping,” I said loyally.
“Minimally,” he said. “He’s been so wrapped up in himself and his own shit lately, he’s not doing enough. And I think he knows it.”
“He’s doing the best he can,” I tried to stick up for my brother though I knew Luke was right.
He shook his head. “You’re doing a great job. With the lumberyard, and with your dad. There are not many people who’d leave their life and come home to help out.”
“My life will be there when I go back to it. This is more important right now.”
“How far off are you from finishing your degree?”
“Just two classes. And then I want to start a nursery, you know, a greenhouse. I really love landscape design, and that would be a service I offer, but I want to be close enough to home that if I’m needed.”
“You know the Langfords are probably getting close to retirement. I don’t know if they’ll sell the plant nursery, but that’s a possibility if you want to stay around here. They come in on Tuesday nights for the fish special most weeks. If you want, I can check out the lay of the land there, see what their plans are. Their only daughter lives out in Arizona. I figure they’ll move out there to be near the grandkids.”
“I’m not in any position to buy out their business, but it was nice of you to think of it. That’s kind of on the back burner right now. I’m not exactly killing it with what I’ve got on my plate now.”
“You are, though. You’ve taken on a lot, most of it by yourself. You know I’d be happy to help out if I can. I mean it, Sarah Jo; all you have to do is ask.”
I nodded. “That’s sweet of you. But you have, what, two jobs already? I don’t think you need to take on my problems, too.”
“How about you let me be the judge of what I can and can’t do? I just want you to know that you’re not alone in this.”
“You keep telling me that, but it’s not—you know what? Let’s change the subject. Make this second lunch break more cheerful than my first one. I left Max in charge of the lumberyard, so I have a few minutes.”
We spent some time reminiscing about the old days and some of the shenanigans we got into back when we were kids. It felt good to laugh and forget about my worries for a little bit. I couldn’t help but notice that when I was with Luke, all the bad stuff seemed to fade into the background, even if just for a little bit. It was a welcome reprieve. But it couldn’t last.
I felt myself falling under his spell, just like I had when we were teenagers. I remembered the secret looks we’d shared that one hot summer. I remember the stolen kisses and the night he took my virginity. I also remembered the heartbreak when he said we couldn’t see each other anymore. But we’d maintained a friendship that I treasured, and I was grateful for it now especially.
If only my brother wasn’t such an obstacle, maybe we could be more. But no, it wasn’t meant to be, so I just had to be happy with what we did have.
After a few more minutes of light conversation, I checked my watch and stood up to go. “Thanks for the chat, but I have to get back to the yard soon.”
Luke stood up and pulled me in for a quick hug, but not before looking meaningfully into my eyes. “It’s so good to have you back,” he said.
I nodded, unable to get the words out from around the lump that had formed in my throat.