The words made me wince. It was everything I had been thinking for weeks now. All my worst nightmares, just what I dreaded was our band’s fate. Voiced out loud, in her scornful tone, I couldn’t help but want to go home to bed and pull the covers over my head for the rest of forever.
She was right. We were never going to amount to anything. If she knew it, all our other fans were bound to realize it sooner or later. There was nothing for it; might as well give up now.
Except that I’d always been stubborn when it came to something I really wanted, and Leah was proving to be as well.
“Yeah, I thought that might shut you up,” she said. “But just shutting up isn’t good enough. I hope you remember this in the morning, and I hope you pull your shit together. Because otherwise, it’s only a matter of time before you’re a washed-up nobody with no options.”
I could see Mark physically deflate before my eyes. I released him, trying not to laugh at the expression on his face. I couldn’t help but feel impressed by Leah. She certainly had a knack for getting people to do what she wanted them to do. I only hoped that where Mark was concerned, the truth spurred him into action rather than making him just give up like I’d momentarily wanted to do.
Mark didn’t seem to know what to say. Finally, he just turned and stalked off. I was surprised to see him brush off some of the groupies who flocked to his side. In fact, he walked clear out of the bar. He might just be going to smoke and cool down, but I hoped he might head home and actually get some sleep for once.
“What’s gotten into him?” Luke asked quizzically, joining us at just the moment that Mark left.
I shrugged, still eyeing Leah. “I guess he finally met a fan who didn’t melt when he looked in her direction,” I finally said.
“Huh,” Luke said, looking at first Leah and then Piper. He did a double-take, looking back at Piper, and I could see Leah’s friend blush and duck her head.
“Listen, we’re going to go get some air and talk about some things,” I told Luke, making a split-second decision that whatever the future might hold for us, I needed them all to know that Leah was mine. “Can you chat with…” I trailed off, realizing I didn’t know Leah’s friend’s name.
“Piper,” she supplied, smiling coyly at Luke.
“Sure,” Luke said, not looking back at me as I all but dragged Leah away.
I thought Leah might protest, but when I turned to face her backstage in the warm-up room, she looked like the cat that ate the canary. “Were you jealous, back there?” she asked.
I rolled my eyes. “Of course not,” I muttered. But I couldn’t help but say, “First Carter, then me, now Mark, though? You trying to work your way through the band?”
It was a reflection of my earlier anger coming back. Even though I knew that wasn’t the way things were with her, there was a part of me that couldn’t forget that I barely knew her. Who knew what she was really all about?
Leah didn’t look angry, to my surprise. Anger was what I would have expected from her. Instead, she just looked sad and hurt. “You should realize by now that I’m not like that,” she said. “I’m not just some groupie.” She smiled wryly. “To be honest, a lot of my problems would be solved if you weren’t a drummer.”
I snorted with amusement. “I know,” I sighed. Then, plainly: “I didn’t like turning around and seeing his arm around you like that. No more than I liked seeing Carter get close to you.”
I never said the word “jealous,” but it was there in all of it. How would she take that? What did I mean by that?
For a moment, I let myself picture what it would be like to have a relationship with her. It was hard to imagine her wanting such a thing, though. She was a good girl, and I was the drummer in some local band. She had a career. We might both be focused on the future, we might both be driven, but that was where the similarities ended.
This wasn’t going anywhere. It couldn’t.
Did I want it to? I cared about her; I knew that. I couldn’t seem to get her out of my head, either. Maybe I did want something more with her. I knew it would be a doomed relationship, though.
It wouldn’t be worth going down that road just for both of us to get hurt in the end.
Fortunately, Leah didn’t press me for more. She didn’t tease me for my jealousy. She simply nodded once, slowly. There was something serious and calculating in her gaze, and I wondered if she was thinking along the same lines as me. I wondered if she had come to the same conclusions as me.