Nothing Left to Lose (Guarded Hearts 1)

Forcing a smile, I wrapped my arms around his neck. “Well, I liked your form,” I joked, noticing how my voice sounded strained and not like mine at all.

His answering smile dazzled me. “I’m glad I impressed you.”

“You always impress me.” That was the truth. Giving in to the passion that was consuming me, I gripped the back of his head. “Kiss me then.” Not giving him the chance to answer or turn me down, I pulled his mouth to mine. He kissed me back so softly that it made me want to cry. It was beautiful. His touch was soft and gentle as his hands wandered down my body, pulling me closer to him and guiding my legs around his waist. My hands twisted into his wet hair as I kissed him with everything that I had inside me, showing him that I loved him without actually saying the words.

My stomach fluttered as I clamped myself to him, revelling in the feeling of his skin against mine. I needed him. I needed more than this kiss. I needed to be completely at one with him, consumed by him, and possessed by him. My whole body ached with a desperate longing that I’d never felt for anyone else.

I broke the kiss and put my forehead to his. “Make love to me, Ashton,” I begged.

His lips parted as he looked at me curiously for a few seconds before pressing his lips to mine softly again for a split second. “I can’t. I don’t have any condoms,” he whispered. He actually looked a little annoyed with himself as he said it.

I sighed and tightened my grip on him. I didn’t even care. If I got pregnant, I would love his babies just as much as I loved him. “I don’t care. Make love to me, please? I need you to.” I looked into his beautiful green eyes, and my insides did a little flip. His eyes were easily my favourite part of his body – and that was saying something because his body was flawless, so his eyes were nothing short of spectacular. I could look into them forever and it still wouldn’t be long enough.

A smile twitched at the corners of his mouth before he kissed me again, nibbling on my bottom lip gently. As the kiss deepened, I realised that every touch and every kiss was different now. I silently wondered if it was because I knew now what ‘making love’ truly was. Was that why being in his arms like this, surrounded by beautiful paradise as far as the eye could see, felt so intimate and amazing? Every touch of his hands was like he was touching my heart and soul; my whole being was aching for him.

I wriggled my hips, trying to get impossibly closer to him. My love for him overwhelmed me as I whimpered into his mouth praying that this moment would last forever. I didn’t ever want to come out of this little Ashton bubble that I was trapped in. We’d been on this island for less than an hour, and already it was the best time I’d ever had in my life.

When he broke the kiss and trailed little kisses down the side of my neck, I gasped and squeezed my eyes shut. “This is gonna be the best Christmas and New Year, ever,” I mumbled. I would do everything in my power to make sure this was the best time he’d ever had too. It frightened me to think just how far I would go to make him happy.

“Yeah, it is,” he agreed huskily. His grip tightened on my hips, moving me a fraction so that our bodies lined up. When I felt pressure at my entrance, I kissed him desperately as he pulled me down gently; entering me so slowly that it was almost maddening.

I moaned at the sheer ecstasy of having him inside me again. It was almost as if I’d been holding my breath for the last two months and now I could finally breathe again. His breath blew across my lips as I pressed my forehead to his and looked into his eyes as he built up a slow and steady rhythm, forcing my pleasure higher and higher with each gentle thrust of his hips.

While we made love, I savoured every second of it, committing every detail to memory. It was beautiful, and the most bitter sweet moment of my life. Everything about it was perfect, from the place, to the warm water that covered our bodies, to the way his hands and mouth seemed to worship my body as he made love to me. Every move was so sweet and tender that it made my heart throb in my chest.

When he held me still against him and swam for the villa, I thought he was going to get us out of the ocean, but he didn’t. Instead, he pushed me up against one of the wooden stilts and continued his beautiful, yet torturous assault. I rested my head back on the post and just looked into his eyes. A strange thought suddenly occurred to me. I was almost grateful for everything that had happened to me in my past. If Carter hadn’t done what he’d done, then I probably wouldn’t have met Ashton. As his mouth closed over mine and his taste filled my senses, I knew that I would go through all of that stuff with Carter in a heartbeat, just for this one perfect moment with Ashton.

A small smile resided on his lips the whole time that he made love to me, his whole face beamed with happiness. The pleasure he was giving me was building to impossible heights. I closed my eyes, tipping my head back, losing myself in the moment and the sensations.

“Look at me, Baby Girl,” he said breathlessly. “Please look at me.” I forced my eyes open, looking back to his angelic face as he smiled and put his forehead against mine. His eyes locked on mine as he continued to take my body and soul to heaven. “That’s better,” he whispered, kissing me softly.

I moaned into his mouth so loudly that it was almost embarrassing, but I couldn’t contain it. My heartbeat was pounding in my ears as was the whoosh of my own blood that was pumping through my veins. Suddenly it hit me, an orgasm so powerful that it made me bite down onto his lip roughly as my whole body shook and convulsed. His fingers dug into my thighs as his mouth claimed mine in a kiss that felt like he was trying to devour my very soul.