They made plans for tomorrow night after they both got off work, and Kendall disconnected the call.
Her life might have gone to hell, but at least Alex’s was looking up.
* * *
A week had gone by since Julian let Kendall walk out of his life. Technically he’d sent her away. And he was still wrestling with why he’d done it. Who he was protecting? Her? Or himself?
He didn’t like the answer he came up with, but he was no closer to knowing how to fix the mess he’d made of his life.
He wasn’t in the mood for a meal now, but Nick insisted they meet at the place they usually chose after a meeting.
The man always knew when Julian was floundering. Everyone should have such a solid friend.
“So you fucked things up with Kendall?” Nick asked bluntly before he even sat down. He settled into the booth and eyed Julian with concern.
“What makes you think that?”
Nick set both arms on the table and leaned forward. “I haven’t heard from you in a week, and you canceled dinner Sunday night by calling Lauren and leaving a message on her cell. None of which is like you. So something’s wrong, and the
only thing I can come up with is Kendall. She’s the one with the power to hurt you.”
“And yet you think I’m the one who fucked it up?”
“Did you?” Nick asked.
“Yes. In a big way.” Julian ran a hand through his hair. “I haven’t slept. I’ve barely eaten. I just—”
Nick picked up a butter knife and twirled it in his hands. “Slow it down and tell me. I’ll understand. Because if you think my road to happiness with my wife was easy, you’re wrong. I was an alcoholic from the time I was in my teens. She had a lot to put up with before and after I sobered up. So I understand mistakes better than most.”
“Can I take your order?” the waitress who had walked over to the table asked.
“Please give us a minute,” Julian said. He waited until she stepped away and glanced at Nick. “I broke it off because Kade will never come around. He hired a PI to check up on me and will do anything to keep me away from her. If I stayed, it would be like forcing her to choose between me and her twin. Nobody should have to do that, especially not Kendall.” Not when friends were hard to come by and she had her own struggles in life.
“Hmm. And what did she say about this… magnanimous, asinine gesture?” Nick asked, calling it as he saw it.
As it was.
Julian winced. “She all but called me a coward.”
Nick burst out laughing. “I knew I liked that girl.” He sobered, his smile leaving his face. “Now tell me why you really sent her away.”
Julian roughly exhaled. “Didn’t you ever hear of preemptive behavior? It was going to come to this eventually. I just did it before she resented me, not after.” The words sounded thick and untrue on his tongue.
Nick shook his head. “Really?” He obviously didn’t buy it, either.
“No. I mean I don’t want her to have to choose. It hurts me to think of doing that to her, but that’s not the main reason I ended things. I did it because it’s going to hurt a fuck of a lot more when she ultimately walks away the longer we stay together.”
“Aha. So you are a coward.” Nick pointed at him accusingly with the butter knife.
“Fuck you.”
“For being right?”
And that was why Nick was such a reliable friend. Julian could count on him to hit him where it hurt and make him face a truth that had been circling in his head all week.
Julian groaned. “To make matters worse, I haven’t called her in a week. I thought I was doing us both a favor but damn. I fucked up. I miss her. And I don’t want Kade dictating how I live my life. Nobody should have that kind of power over another human being. I screwed up, but I don’t deserve that kind of punishment forever.”
“No, they shouldn’t,” Nick agreed. “But as for Kade, I’m not sure he’s the villain you’re making him out to be. Put yourself in his place. Your sister-in-law comes to you and says trust me, this guy who screwed you over is really a good man. You’re going to just buy into it?”