"Higher," Tanner called again.
I looked for Jess who was sitting at a picnic table not far away. She gave me a little nod, which I took to mean he could go a little bit higher. So, I gave him a gentle push.
He swung for a little bit and I was relieved when he was done. He ran over to the slide and I stayed at the bottom as he climbed to the top and then slid down straight into my arms. I couldn't remember ever feeling so fucking happy. Well, that's not completely true. I was this happy in Mexico four years ago. And from that happiness, this wonderful child had been made.
Perhaps I was biased, but Tanner was an amazing child. He was precocious and clever. He had an inquisitive mind and an adventurous spirit. And when I got a splinter in my finger from the picnic table when we sat to take a rest, he showed a great deal of compassion and concern.
As angry as I was at Jess, I had to give her credit for being a single mother in raising such a wonderful little boy.
Jess was able to get the splinter out of my finger, a
nd it took every ounce of my willpower to keep from letting the feel of her hands on mine fog my brain. I couldn't afford to let my feelings take over again.
Tanner was climbing on the jungle gym and I was doing my best to keep underneath him in case he fell, when Jess's phone rang. I didn't dare look over at her to see what the call was about because I didn't want Tanner to fall.
"We need to finish up here," Jess said as she came to stand with me at the jungle gym.
"Why?" I asked.
"I don't want to go, mommy," Tanner said hanging precariously from a bar. I scrambled to get under him.
"I was just given a new physical therapy client and he is being released from the hospital today. They’d like me to come by."
I frowned. “Who watches Tanner when you're working?"
"Reggie usually does. She works from home. It's a good situation for both of us because she needed a roommate to help with her mortgage, and a little extra money, which she gets by babysitting Tanner."
I just met my son, and wasn't ready to leave his side. "I can watch him."
The hesitation in Jess's eyes increased my anger.
"You don't think I can do it?"
"It's not that I don't think you can do it, Carter. It's that Tanner has only just met you. He might be uncomfortable going with you because he doesn't know you very well yet."
I still had one eye on Tanner as I glared at her. "It's not my fault that he doesn't know me. And he won't know me if I don’t get to spend time with him."
"Catch me daddy."
I looked up and all of a sudden, he let go of the bar and he was dropping down. It felt like it had to be 100 feet, but he was barely just above my head. I caught him and pulled him to me. I was about to scold him because he scared the shit out of me, but he looped his arms around my neck and laughed. "That was fun."
"I think he gets that adventurous spirit from you," Jess said next to me.
"I don't want to go home, mommy," Tanner said, wiggling his way out of my arms and down to the ground again. "Can't I stay here with daddy?"
I looked to Jess, arching a brow at her. "Actually, maybe you would like to go with me to meet your grandfather. He lives at the beach. We could make sand castles."
Tanner jumped up and down. "Can we mommy? Can we? I want to go to the beach. I want to meet my grandfather."
Jess looked concerned, but before she could express it, I said, "I'll give you a call if anything goes wrong. Or I will bring him back to your house and leave him with Reggie." The idea of leaving him ever from now on didn't sit well with me, but I knew I had to take this one step at a time.
She let out a breath. "Okay. You can go to the beach to meet your grandfather with your dad." She squatted down to Tanner's level. "Your dad will have my phone number or Reggie's number, if you need anything."
"Okay." Tanner looked up at me as he took my hand. "I'm ready to go." Clearly, he didn't seem to have any concern about going off with me, but at the same time I knew he was young, and perhaps being away from his mother too long might make him nervous.
Jess drove us all back to her house, and she took the car seat out from her car and put it in the backseat of my SUV. I was thankful I had thought to bring it instead of the convertible.
"You be on your best behavior, okay?" Jess said as she strapped Tanner into the car.