“All right, baby?” I asked quietly.
“I am now. I’m always all right in your arms.”
“It’s where you belong.”
She snuggled closer, and I felt her tears on my chest.
“I’m going to go tomorrow, Julian.”
My heart broke, and my voice was thick when I spoke. “Okay, baby. I understand.”
“But I want you to come to us as soon as you can.”
I pulled back, peering down at her. “What?”
“I’m not the only one who needs to think, Julian. You have to be sure you can give this up—without regrets. I don’t want this to come between us.”
I began to protest, but she stopped me. “You have to. We both have to be sure.”
“I want you. Julianna. A life together.”
“I want that too. But I need you to do this.”
“How long?” I asked.
“However long it takes.”
“I’ll miss you, Tally. You and Jujube. I’ll miss you so much, and I’ll miss more of her growing up.” My voice caught. “If you’re pregnant—”
“The test was negative. I took it earlier.”
I was shocked at the disappointment I felt. But I held her tighter. “We’ll work on that later.”
“Okay.”
I bent my head and kissed her.
“I’ll be waiting,” she promised.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Julian
It took everything in me to watch Tally board that plane with Julianna in her arms. I felt as if a part of me was being ripped away. I had sat and talked to Matteo and Marcus for hours in the dark of the night while my family slept. I was as open and honest as I had ever been with them. They each spoke of their decision, how they made it and why. They also agreed with Tally.
“You need to be sure. Think it through carefully,” Matteo advised.
I met Marcus’s eyes, and he nodded in understanding. “I know how you feel. When I saw Missy in front of that monster, my decision was made, and I have never wavered. I know your role is different, Julian, but you are still a target—and you know that now. A simple breach in protocol opened you up. It could happen again.”
“Close your life here. Come find a new one. There’s a spot on the island for you. Tally will have friends, your children will have playmates. A different sort of life, but a good one. Safe. Protected. You can travel, see the world. Help with the fund. Be with your family. It’s a great life.” Matteo leaned back. “I have never once regretted my decisions. Evie and our children give me everything I need.”
“Thank you for coming to help me get mine back.”
Matteo waved me off. “You could have done it without us, but you were right. Marcus walking in threw that asshole off-balance. His little brain couldn’t keep up.”
Marcus smirked. “I have that effect on people.”
We all chuckled, and Matteo became serious. “We’ll take care of your family, Julian. Protect them like they are our own. Don’t stay away too long.”
“I want Tally to have a chance to make sure she wants me in her life.”
He gripped my shoulder. “Then we’ll see you soon. She is as in love with you as you are with her.”
I watched the plane disappear, holding on to those words. Then I left and organized leaving this lonely life.
With Tally safely away, and her permission, I flew to Nova Scotia and stayed in the small, homey cabin that had housed my family and kept them warm and safe. I packed up the personal items I recognized as Tally’s and all the baby stuff and shipped it back to Toronto. I spent a full day reading Tally’s journal. Pictures she had printed on a cheap color printer that showed her growing stomach. I read of her love for our unborn daughter. Wept at her words of fear and loneliness. Gazed in wonder at her thoughts of the love she held for me. It was there on every page, soaked into the paper. Some pages were smudged with her tears, mine joining them. I brought it home with me, hoping to relive all those days of discovery as another Jujube grew inside her all over again—this time beside her.
I drove to the small town where June and her aunt lived to deliver the keys and news. I sat and talked to them, the older woman very frail but her strong spirit evident. I assured them both Tally was safe and would always be. I spoke of my love for her and the hope we would weather this storm and be together. I assured her what had torn us apart was resolved, and it seemed to bring her peace.
Cathy patted my hand, her skin pale and delicate against my darker hue. “She has always loved you,” she murmured. “She always will. I know you’ll find each other again.”
I left comforted and at peace. When June let me know her aunt had passed, I sent flowers for her service, feeling a great deal of sadness for her loss, even though I had only met her once. She had loved and protected my family, and I would be eternally grateful.