“Hmm…” Dazai peered up at the clock while tilting his head. “I did contact everyone, but the agents here are all so laid-back, y’know? It’ll probably take them a little longer to arrive.”
Crossing his arms, Kunikida stared at Dazai. “Yes, you’re one to talk, Dazai. You’re basically the king of Laid-Back Land.” Kunikida pouted his lips. “You said this was a meeting, but do you have any specific ideas on how you’re going to proceed?”
“Yeah, yeah, I already came up with a plan. Not even the Prime Minister of Meeting Procedure Land, Kunikida, will complain.”
Dazai then got out of his seat and began to write on the whiteboard in the corner of the room.
“Step one: exchange ideas.
“Step two: pick the most suitable proposal given.
“Step three: assign appropriate roles.
“…So? Rather systematic, wouldn’t you agree?” Dazai claimed while tapping the whit
eboard.
“It is systematic…which is actually why I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” Kunikida frowned. “That part about roles especially worries me. This is you we’re talking about, after all. I’ll bet you devised some sort of scheme to get out of any work at all. Am I wrong?”
“I’m offended. I would never be so deceptive. Surely my colleague Kunikida trusts me, right?” Dazai spread his arms wide, claiming innocence.
“Nope,” replied Kunikida.
“Sorry, I don’t believe you, either…,” added Tanizaki.
“Never believed anyone less,” said Yosano.
Dazai leaped out of his chair in an amused manner. “So cruel!”
“We’ll be keeping our eyes on you. At any rate, let’s not worry about step three for now. We need to start exchanging ideas,” said Kunikida as he checked the clock once more. The only two agents missing were Ranpo and Kenji. The final decision would need the majority vote, meaning their presence would be essential, but a meeting to exchange ideas with the current members was more than doable.
“That’s the spirit!” Dazai said with a smile. “If Kunikida wants to start, then let the meeting begin. All right, then… Any proposals?”
Dazai took a seat, then looked at everyone in rotation one by one. Each of the room’s occupants exchanged glances, hesitant to speak up. They could go toe to toe with the most violent skill users while humming a merry tune, but even these veteran detectives weren’t good at everything, and reading the situation was one such difficulty for them. When each agent in a gathering possessed an outstanding skill and unusual personality, one would have a better chance of finding treasure in the unexplored corners of South America than trying to guess what the other was thinking. However, the silence was soon broken.
“Oh, wow! Look at Tanizaki! Look at how he’s glowing! He’s just dying to speak up!” Frustrated, Dazai threw Tanizaki to the wolves.
“Huh? M-me?” Tanizaki pointed at himself, puzzled.
“I can see it! The radiant idea is illuminating your body! Go ahead. Tell us about that ace up your sleeve! Tell us about your cherished proposal that will make us jump out of our seats and clap! Our hearts are ready!”
“Please don’t make this any more difficult than it already is!” Tanizaki cried out in a fluster. “Anyway, I don’t think it needs to be some convoluted test. Why don’t we just look at the requests we’ve received from clients and pick out something reasonable from there? I believe I heard that’s what they did with you, Dazai.”
“Oh! Good idea! Thanks, Tanizaki.” Dazai proceeded to write “handle a case” on the whiteboard in black. “Any objections?”
“You already know the answer to that, Dazai,” Kunikida said. “That would work if this were any ordinary newcomer. However, the military police are under orders to put down the beast that’s been terrorizing the district. In other words, he’s wanted. The agency won’t have any problem concealing his identity to an extent, but that doesn’t mean we should toss him into the midst of chaos before he’s even hired. Surely the president told you this already.”
“They don’t call you the president’s top apprentice for nothing!” Dazai placed his hands on his cheeks. “The president essentially told me the same thing. Hmm… It was a very reasonable proposal, but we have to come up with a test that won’t attract too much outside attention. Sorry, Tanizaki.”
“Oh…,” Tanizaki uttered with a note of disappointment. “Then…how about having him solve a problem within the agency?”
“Such as?”
“Hmm… Maybe like clearing a paper jam or cleaning the pipes?”
“This isn’t a janitorial position.” Kunikida furrowed his brow. “Besides, there aren’t really any incidents at the agency that could ‘test the veracity of one’s soul.’”
“We’ll come back to this one.”