Hush Baby Hush

15

mckenzie

“Here you go, girls,”Rudy says. “Two sparkling lemonades, one vodka cranberry, and a painkiller for the birthday girl.”

Teagan claps her hands giddily as Rudy sets a tall, brightly colored drink on the table in front of her. “Thank you so much, it looks delicious.”

“Don’t mention it, kiddo,” he says with affection. “First round’s on the house.”

When Teagan told us she wanted to cap off the day with dinner at Rudy’s, I was a little surprised. I would’ve thought she’d want to go somewhere special to celebrate her twenty-second birthday. Now that we’re here, I can see why she wanted to come. There’s comfort in the warm smiles from people who are happy to see you walk through the door.

Once Rudy’s out of earshot, Teagan turns a conspiratorial eye toward me and says, “So, what happened next?”

I pull the wrapper off my straw and slide it into my lemonade.

“Austin gave me a bath,” I say.

She presses a hand to her heart. “That’s so sweet.”

“I mean, he had to. I was so deep in sub space I could hardly move.”

“That’s so hot.” April sighs, wistful. “I love the feeling when little space and sub space collide. I cry like a baby every time. But anyway, time for a birthday toast!”

She lifts her vodka-cranberry cocktail, and I do the same with my lemonade. Since Hollywood’s pregnant and neither of us are twenty-one, it’s up to April to keep up with Teagan.

“Here’s to friendship,” April says, “and to birthdays, and to being little no matter how big we get.”

Teagan grins. “Amen.”

We clink our glasses together.

I glance around the table as I sip my drink. I’ve never had a group of friends like this before. And it’s sad to think I could’ve had these connections a lot sooner if I hadn’t been working so hard to keep everyone but Hollywood at arm’s length. Jill, my therapist, has helped me recognize my tendency to isolate when I feel overwhelmed.

“But, Kenzie...” Hollywood touches my shoulder. “Weren’t you triggered by roleplaying something so close to what actually happened to you?”

“A little, at first. But when I remembered it was Austin, I stopped being afraid and started enjoying myself. It became something else entirely.”

“Something sexy.” April wags her eyebrows. “Jonathan and I sometimes roleplay that I’m still a cam model. I’ll get on my laptop in the guestroom, and he’ll be on his computer in the bedroom, and we’ll pretend he’s my long-distance daddy.”

“Yum,” Teagan says. She takes a long draw from her drink. “What about you, Holly?”

“What about me?”

“Have you and Cal been seizing the moment while you’re still child-free?”

“She and Cal hump like rabbits,” I say.

“We do not!” Hollywood slaps my arm playfully, but she can’t hide her smile. “Okay, we do, but I can’t help it. I’ve beeninsatiablesince I got pregnant.”

“I believe it,” Teagan says. “When I was pregnant with Lucy, I could not get enough of Jonah’s dick. Not that he was complaining.”

Our conversation dissolves into giggles. I glance at the bar where Austin, Cal, and April’s husband, Jonathan, are nursing beers, close enough to keep an eye on us, but distant enough that it still feels like we’re out by ourselves. We spent the first half of the day getting massages and mani-pedis, followed by two rounds of minigolf and a game of laser tag. Now the plan is to stuff our faces with chicken fingers, fried pickles, and loaded tater tots while Teagan and April get their drink on.

Cal says something to Austin that makes him laugh so hard he slaps his knee. A smile teases my lips into a crescent. I’m glad Austin’s finding ways to enjoy himself. I feel guilty that he has to follow me around like a bodyguard. But with the extra attention Hollywood and I have been getting, the guys thought it’d be best to stay close in case a reporter tries to bother us.

I notice Jeremy with a group of young guys over by the pool tables, all of them standing around looking at his phone. One of them, a stocky guy in a baseball cap, glances at me and says something to Jeremy, who shakes his head.

A server delivers our appetizer spread before I can spare any significant thought to whatever the hell that’s about.