Avoiding Commitment (Avoiding 1)

"I really can't…" she stammered.

"Oh come on. We don't have to get anything. Just a quick look," Bekah said her smile bright and vibrant at the prospect. She grabbed a hold of Lexi's elbow and hauled her through the well lit storefront. Bekah's eyes barely focused on the stunning collections before her. She ignored the eager looks from the sales associates as she dragged Lexi to the counter she zeroed in on. Lexi felt as if she had just hit the top a rollercoaster ride and her stomach was on auto-pilot down the metallic runway.

Engagement rings clouded her vision. Perfectly cut, perfectly designed, flawless engagement rings on display shining brilliantly in the light. Lexi's hands were shaking as she reached out to touch the glass for support. This was not good. She could not be here with Bekah. It was all fine and dandy when they were shopping for dresses and exchanging information, but this…this was entirely different. She couldn't imagine one of these beautiful stones on Bekah's ring finger securing her to the man she loved…to the man Lexi loved. Her gag reflex was threatening to take over her as she swiped a thin layer of sweat from her brow.

"Aren't they gorgeous?" Bekah cooed her extra thick blond hair framing her face as her eyes ballooned at the prospect of owning such a rock.

"They're…they're something," Lexi mumbled coughing into her wrist.

"I'd love this one," she said pointing to a large princess cut diamond set on a thin white gold band.

"Would you like to try it on?" the sales associate asked materializing out of thing air with a set of keys. He undid the lock and procured the ring from its home before she even had an option of declining.

"Oh dear," Bekah exclaimed taking the ring and sliding it onto her ring finger. To Lexi's pleasant surprise it was much too large. It would have to be downsized considerably to even look remotely good on her finger. Regardless, the diamond still shone true and her French manicured hands only increased the beauty and perfect that was now placed on her hand. "Well that won't do quite yet then," Bekah conceded handing the ring back to the associate. "Next time perhaps," she added winking.

"I think…I should go," Lexi said retreating.

"Yes," Bekah said glancing up at her, "we should go. Are you alright? You don't look well."

"I'll be fine," Lexi said hurrying out of the Tiffany's and back into the open mall air. She let out a long breath and felt color return to her cheeks.

"Well I'll see you Friday, if not beforehand," Bekah said nodding her head at Lexi as she exited the mall. Lexi fell into the cool comforting car and forced her mind to wander in other directions. The last thing she needed to consider was engagement rings and proposals.

Ramsey had vaguely hinted that he would be out when she returned from her shopping excursion. Something related to work though he hadn't given any details and had completely evaded any further questioning on the subject. He had slipped a key into her purse before letting her out of the house, and told her that she was welcome back whenever she had completed her errands. After depositing the hanger in the upstairs guest bedroom and letting any remaining thoughts of engagements flutter from her mind, Lexi found that she felt surprisingly relaxed. She had a new fabulous dress. She never had to speak to Jack's snotty girlfriend again. And soon enough she would be spending some much needed time with her family. Not much else could get her this excited. The only issue that she had left to deal with was talking to Jack.

She needed to figure out what was going on between them before she left for New York this weekend. She only had a couple days left, and every time they had been together had held sexual tension or outright anger. If she was ever going to let him go, then she needed to get everything out of the way…out in the air.

That is how she found herself hailing a taxi to take her back to his place. It had only been three days since she had last stepped foot into his apartment, but so much had happened since then it felt like a lifetime.

The late night attendant she had passed while entering the building only a couple days earlier seemed to remember her and buzzed her through to Jack's floor. She knocked once before twisting the knob and surprisingly finding it open. The lights were dim as she entered and a flickering was coming from a room off the entrance. No sounds could be heard from the apartment, and as she stepped past the kitchen candlelight seemed to take over. A hundred or more candles of varying shapes and sizes filled the living room and several more lit the dining room where two plates were set and a bottle of wine sat chilled.

Lexi's mind was whirling. This couldn't be for her. Why would he do something like this for her? Did he just want to confuse her? Granted, it was beautiful. She could feel tears welling to her eyes as they drifted from one romantic scene to the next. Is this what it felt like to have Jack be only yours?

Except he wasn't.

He belonged to Bekah. So what was he doing making her feel like this now? After she had just confessed everything to his girlfriend. After he had flown her down here to convince the new girl that she was what he wanted. Was this a thank you of some sort? Did he actually think he had to thank for what she had done? Because this wasn't helping her ability to get closure. She couldn't have him being sweet to her when she needed so desperately to forget him. Even if she was, as Bekah suspected, the reason he hadn't been able to commit to anyone else in so long. She still needed to be rid of him in her life. No longer could she be controlled by his desires and passions. She needed to be in control for once.

"Do you like it?" Jack asked from behind her. Lexi turned slowly and took in the beautiful man in front of her. He wasn't overly dressed which put her mind slightly at ease. He wore a pair of dark loose fit jeans and a white linen button up rolled up to his elbows. His blue eyes were momentarily hidden under his midnight hair. His complexion was dark from the summer sun which only added to the exotic effect he was exuding.

"I…well…yes, but why?" she asked her eyes leaving his sexy body and falling on things that she was more capable of discerning accurately with her heart racing like it was.

"Because I needed to apologize," he said stepping towards her.

"Is this how you apologize to everyone?" she asked attempting to keep her eyes averted despite the fact that he was standing so close she could almost feel the heat rising off of him.