I got this… I got this…I got this… I chanted to myself as I neared the apparatus, running as fast as I could. Speed was absolutely crucial for this skill. Hurdling into a round-off, I rebounded off the springboard and arched back, my body a steep angle, remembering all the times Madeline and Kova had yelled at me to block as hard as I could. I exploded off the table. My stomach fluttered and my body snapped down to generate power. I started rotating while I continued to fly upward, squeezing every muscle to stay tight. It all happened so fast and yet it felt like slow motion. My body glided off muscle memory and I opened up for my landing.
Ankles glued together, my feet pounded into the mat. I let out a gush of air and raised my arms; chalk floated around me from the impact of my landing. I smiled and saluted, then turned to salute the judges.
No hop. No shift in my stance or step out.
I’d stuck my landing perfectly.
The huge grin was still on my face when I turned toward Kova, who enthusiastically clapped his hands and threw a fist in the air, yelling his excitement. He spotted me as I stepped off the podium and I flew into his arms.
"Velikolepnyy! Magnificent!" Kova shouted, and kissed the side of my cheek. "Velikolepnyy!"
Giving me one last squeeze, he released me and grabbed my shoulder. A little shake and he yanked me to him for another hug. I laughed, feeling his surge of happiness roll into me.
It didn't take long for my score to flash above our heads. Excitement bloomed inside my chest. Much to my surprise, I was currently in first place on the first rotation.
"Put' k rabote! Way to go!" he shouted in Russian. "Ah, velikolepnyy, Adrianna!"
My cheeks ached from grinning so big. No matter how hard I trained, seeing my name in first place was always a shock. "Thank you."
"Come. We must get ready for bars now."
I nodded and quickly grabbed my bag to follow Kova to the next rotation. I kept my focus only on my coach and didn't look around at the audience or the other events. I needed my head to stay in the game, and Kova was my center. Even when I was panicked and at my worst, Kova always kept me focused and balanced.
After I pulled on my grips, I chalked up. I'd be performing the new release skills Kova and I had worked on the last couple of weeks, along with my dismount.
"Remember, do not hold on too long when your dismount comes," he said as he stood next to me, then he gave me some other last-minute pointers. I nodded and nodded, and nodded some more. I stepped behind the mat and waited for the green light, while Kova moved to stand parallel to the apparatus.
Once I was given the okay from the judges, bars went as smoothly as vault, and my routine was over before I could take a breath. I landed my new dismount, smiling from ear to ear, and immediately searched for Kova. One look into his eyes and I knew he felt the same thing I did. Satisfaction. I thought he was going to fly onto the mat and sweep me off my feet. He was beaming, his green eyes large and evoking passion.
I felt good. Really damn good.
Kova engulfed me in a hug. "You took my breath away out there," he said near my ear. Goose bumps broke out over my arms. "I was in awe watching you."
I pulled back and lifted one side of my mouth into a shy grin. "Thanks, Coach."
There were two events down and two to go when that shadow of doubt crept into my mind as we moved on to beam. Had I practiced hard enough? Made all the necessary adjustments? Had I put enough heart into everything? I may finish in the top eight, even the top three at the rate I was going, but that still didn't mean I'd secure one of the twelve seats I dreamed of having.
Butterflies swirled in my stomach. I wanted to be in the All-Around, a gymnast used in all four events, but I could easily be a specialist and only compete in one event. While my performance today weighed heavily in their final decision, all my past meets played a part in it as well. There had been various times when a gymnast hadn't performed up to par at a nationals meet but had excelled in previous competitions and still picked for the team. It was all about who could perform under pressure and handle representing the country, and I had to wonder if I’
d done enough.
Kova snapped his fingers and I immediately looked at him. "Focus. Do not go where you just were again." I nodded. "Now, you have the option here on beam. Do you want to push the difficulty, or perform your usual routine?" Kova asked.
Every gymnast had a list of backup skills with a myriad of difficulty they could add or remove to a routine depending on what happened at a meet and who they were competing against. That way, if a gymnast before me fell off the balance beam, or touched it with both hands after a large wobble, then I'd be able to lower my difficulty for a safer, cleaner routine if I wanted. The same went for all the other events. I had choices, though not many, and I'd only changed mine a select few times.
Chewing my bottom lip, I considered my options. I could keep it safe, or I could take a risk. I was quick to chance the difficulty with other events because I was more confident in them, but balance beam always fucked me sideways.
But not today, Satan. Not. Today.
I glanced at Kova. "Let's do it."
He studied me, the corners of his mouth twitching. I knew he was sizing me up, making sure I was mentally ready, and I appreciated that. Finally, his shoulders relaxed and he nodded his head, a grin spread across his face. Kova was excited and that made me feel good because I wanted to make him proud.
"Excellent."
We went over strategy and what I would change. It wasn't a lot, but it was enough to give me that extra edge.
Right before I saluted the judges, I patted my hands in the chalk bowl to absorb my feelings, and I wondered for a split second if I had made a grave mistake by pushing it.