“Can I help?”
“No. Please. You’ve had a long day. Allow me.”
I took a seat while Gavin pulled two glasses from the cabinet and popped open the bottle of red. Admiring his big, masculine hands, I looked for a wedding ring. There was none. The only things Genevieve had divulged to me in the past several months were that Gavin was an entrepreneur and he’d never finished law school. She didn’t reveal much about his personal life, and I never prodded her for more information. I might have been afraid to find out the truth.
He poured my wine and placed the glass in front of me on the table.
“Thank you,” I said.
“You’re welcome.”
He poured himself a glass, got out two plates and some silverware, and then carried everything over. He opened the boxes of Chinese, and we each served ourselves.
We sat in silence for a couple of minutes as we took the first bites of our food and sipped the wine. The tension in the air was thick. It was hard not to stare at his beautiful face, but whenever I did, it only made the pain in my chest worse. My Gavin. He was right here. But so far away.
He looked just as stressed as I was.
He finally put his fork down and said, “I just want to get this out of the way, alright?”
My heart sped up. “Okay…”
“What happened between us was a long time ago. We’re both adults. Despite getting off on the wrong foot, I’m not harboring any hard feelings toward you, Raven. I can tell I’m making you very nervous right now. And I feel like that’s because you’re waiting for me to snap or something. I want you to know it’s all good, okay? What happened…was a decade ago.”
That gave me mixed feelings. I didn’t want him to still be hurt by what I did. But all the feelings I’d ever had for him were still there, and a part of me wished he felt the same—even just a little.
“Thank you for clarifying that,” I said. “It’s been hard for me to see you after all this time. But I don’t want things to be awkward, and I appreciate you trying to break the ice.”
When I looked up, his eyes lingered on mine in a way that made me doubt he was as unaffected by me as he claimed. His mouth had just said one thing, but his eyes were saying another.
Or maybe that was just wishful thinking on my part. I got lost in those eyes for a few seconds until he interrupted with a question.
“Now that we got that out of the way, tell me about my father. What is your take on his prognosis?” He took a bite of food as he waited for my response.
“Your father’s condition has definitely worsened compared to when I started here six months ago. He has difficulty finding the right words to say what he wants, and he gets confused a lot. I don’t think anyone can say how fast this will progress.”
“I think I may need to move him to London.”
Hearing that made my stomach drop. I wasn’t sure how Mr. M would handle such a drastic move—not to mention, he’d become attached to me. I felt very sad at the prospect of him losing everything that seemed to matter.
“Are you looking for my opinion on that?” I asked.
He wiped his mouth. “Yes, of course.”
“I don’t think that would be what’s best for him. This house, the staff here, are all that he knows. And while, yes, it would be easier for you to keep an eye on him if he were physically closer to you, I think the only person who would benefit from that is you.”
Gavin nodded, seeming to let my words sink in. “Fair enough. Thank you for your input.” He shook his head. “I can’t believe he thinks you’re your mother. I mean, you do look like her. But the fact that he doesn’t remember...” He stopped himself.
“That she’s dead, yeah. That surprised me, too.”
He closed his eyes. “I’m so sorry about Renata.”
“Thank you.” I thought back to the funeral. “The flowers you sent were very beautiful.”
He looked at me for the longest time. “I thought about you a lot when it happened. I wanted to come home so badly, but I was afraid to upset you. I thought you wouldn’t have wanted me there. We hadn’t seen each other since…you know.” He hesitated. “So, anyway, I decided to send flowers.”
“I’m not sure anything would have fazed me back then. I was so distraught.”
Gavin reached across the table for my hand. “I’m sorry.”
His touch sparked a feeling of déjà vu. Between that and thinking about my mother, my emotions got the best of me. When I started to cry, he moved his seat around to my side of the table.