‘Honestly, Rafe, I haven’t ridden a bike since I was a teenager.’
‘Which means your backside and legs will ache afterwards.’ The way Izzy’s backside filled out her shorts and trousers set his body aflame. ‘No, you’re right. Better I go alone and get home earlier.’
‘You’re backing out now?’ She turned to face him.
There was no winning with Izzy. ‘Let’s stop somewhere for a late lunch instead.’
‘Your shout for winding me up.’ Her mouth spread into a cheeky smile and they were back on track, tension about their pasts forgiven.
But not forgotten. One day he’d find the courage to tell her the rest of the Cassie story. But not today. He’d hate to see pity in her eyes. ‘Wouldn’t have it any other way, mon amie.’ Except friends didn’t make his gut tighten over a smile. This was getting out of hand. He needed breathing space, which would be hard to find while they shared his house and worked on the same ward.
‘How about we have a French week?’ She’d know exactly what he meant. It wasn’t the first time, and probably wouldn’t be the last. ‘Everywhere we go except at the hospital.’ Probably get locked up for speaking nothing but French there.
‘Je ne veau pas faire de vélo.’
‘Dure.’
Too late he realised how intimate spending time talking in his native language might be. He grimaced, then went with cheeky. ‘I don’t need to teach you to ride. Your body will remember how to push the pedals even if you cry foul, so toughen up.’
‘Does this mean you’re cooking dinner tonight? I’d like coq au vin.’
‘Say that in French and I might oblige,’ he replied in French. Actually, she wasn’t too rusty, but he’d keep at her as it’d been a while since she’d been submerged in the language and he intended taking her back to Avignon to visit Grand’mère in the next few weeks.
And that idea had nothing to do with the feelings he wasn’t admitting even to himself.
Or did it?
CHAPTER FIVE
RAPHAEL SLIPPED INTO the seat opposite Isabella in the hospital cafeteria with a mug of coffee in one hand and a large egg mayo sandwich in the other. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘Initiation course.’ At eight that morning Isabella had received a call from the head nurse of the maternity ward to come in and do the drill all newly signed-on employees had to partake in.
‘Damn, sorry, I was meant to tell you about that.’
‘Apparently.’ Forcing a laugh, she tried not to notice how Raphael’s shoulders shaped his suit to perfection. That perfect word again. It popped up a lot around Rafe. But how his body filled his clothes? This was Raphael. Seems when she got jet lag she got it bad. ‘No problem. It’s the same old, same old. Work in one large hospital and you know the routine for any others you go to.’ She’d spent the last few hours learning the ropes of where fire extinguishers and staircases were, as well as all the safety rules involving staff. ‘Lunch is the best bit so far, even if beyond late.’ It was nearly two and she was starving.
He blinked. ‘Not same old food, then?’
‘Nothing different about that, but it’s far more interesting being in here.’ Her hand swept the room. ‘There are real people in here, not sheep following Miss This-Way-Folks all over the hospital.’
Raphael’s laugh sent ripples of warmth through her. He was watching her closely. Looking for what? ‘You seem a lot more awake than I’ve seen since you arrived. The jet lag must be wearing off,’ he said.
‘How was surgery?’ He’d left home before six as his surgical list had four ops, one of which he thought might throw up some complications, and he’d wanted to be prepared. Nothing unusual there.
Now he nodded once, a grim expression on his face as he glanced around them. ‘The woman I told you about? The cancer has gone through to the uterus, as I’d suspected. Then when we had that sorted she haemorrhaged from the large bowel and we found another growth. I had to call in David Stokes, one of the general surgeons, to take over when I’d done all I could.’ He shook his head. ‘Some people get a raw deal.’
It wasn’t sounding good for the woman. ‘Take it easy. You’ve done all you can.’ Isabella reached for his hand, squeezed it before letting go in a hurry. That wasn’t a normal gesture from her to Raphael. But he was so distressed she could almost see anguish oozing out of his pores. It was also there in the tightness of his shoulders and the white lines around his mouth.
‘I know. It’s up to the oncologists now. She’s only forty-one.’ His frustrated sigh cut through her, had her wanting to take his pain for him.
One reason for preferring midwifery to nursing patients that specialists like Raphael dealt with was not having to face some of these grim cases. ‘If you’re not too late finishing tonight do you want to go out for a meal?’ In her lap her fingers crossed of their own accord. Knowing doctors had little control over their private hours she didn’t really expect an instant acceptance.
‘Sounds like a plan.’ Where was the enthusiasm?
‘Look, we can give it a miss if you’d prefer.’
He looked straight at her. ‘If I knock off about six will you hang around in town? I’m thinking we can go along the river to this bar everyone frequents. You’ll like it.’
‘That’s a yes, then.’ Raphael hadn’t said no, or maybe; he’d said he’d be there. Yippee. Suddenly the ho-hum day had become bright and exciting.
Careful. This is your friend. He won’t see it as a hot date.
Nor should she. Yeah, but it was growing on her that she’d come home, as in found her niche. Being with Raphael relaxed her in ways she hadn’t known for a long time—for two years, really. Was that what close friends did? Or was there another reason for this deep sense of belonging whenever she was with him? If only she could sort out her mixed-up feelings for him. Slowing her breathing, she went for calm. ‘Great, I’ll be around here somewhere. Might see if Carly wants to go for a coffee and catch up while I wait for you. She’s on days this week.’
‘I need to tell you—you’ll probably get a call asking if you mind starting on the ward tomorrow instead of Wednesday. We’re three staff down and as busy as can be,’ Raphael told her. ‘Don’t feel pressured to say yes. I know you’re still tired and taking naps like a toddler.’ His smile sent ripples throughout her body, which was frankly weird. He shouldn’t make her feel like this. Except apparently he did.
‘I’ll be fine, might even be better for doing something. If not, there’s the weekend to catch up on sleep.’ Now she was becoming boring. Though it wasn’t boredom rippling through her body as the impact of that smile continued blasting her. Since when did Raphael’s smiles disturb her in any way? Isabella had no answer so went with devouring her now cold pie. Their relationship was changing. Hopefully for the better.
‘Have you made appointments to look at flats yet?’ No grin now. More of an intense scrutiny of the bottom of his empty mug.
So he wanted her gone sooner than later. Her shoulders slumped. She hauled them tight. She would not be upset. ‘I’ve hardly had time,’ she snapped. ‘I didn’t think there was that much of a hurry.’
‘There isn’t.’ Now he locked eyes with her. ‘I just thought you were in a hurry to get started on settling down.’
‘Should’ve known.’ She’d reacted too quickly and come up with the wrong answer. ‘I’ll get on to it shortly. I need to decide where to live that’s not too far from the hospital and yet in a bit of a community. If that’s possible close to the city centre. I do like the area you’re in but rentals there are probably exorbitant. You wouldn’t want me too close keeping an eye on what you get up to either.’
He stood and gathered his plate and mug. ‘Not true, Izzy. I’m thrilled you’re staying in my house, and about to start working on my ward. It’s been too long since we spent time together, and we mustn’t let that happen again.
’
Quite the speech. One that sounded false. She didn’t fully understand, and suspected there was something more behind the words. But thrilled? Really? Good. Great even. One thing she knew for certain. ‘I agree. It’s been for ever since we could sit and shoot the breeze.’ For some reason the thought of not having Rafe nearby, if not right beside her, was beginning to feel wrong. As if they were meant to be together. The last crust of her pie fell to the plate. She and Raphael? Together? As in a couple? Come on. That’s what she’d been avoiding admitting since arriving in London.
‘I’ll text you when I’m done tonight.’ He was smiling, happiness shining out of his cerulean gaze. ‘Want me to take your plate, or are you going to finish that pastry?’
Pushing the plate at him she shook her head, and tried to find something to say. But nothing sensible came up, so she remained quiet. She was off balance, and Raphael wasn’t helping by looking at her like he wanted more from her. They knew each other inside out. Ah, not quite. See? She’d never have thought that before. Okay, but since when hadn’t she been able to read whatever he wasn’t saying? Usually she could do it with her eyes shut. Not today. ‘I’ll see you later,’ she muttered. Yes, she still wanted to have dinner with him. More than before. Really? Yes, really. As in more than catching up. As in getting to know him when she already did. As in trying to understand why she was so off centre around him. Was she on the rebound from Darren? But if this was a rebound, why pick her friend?
Because he’s safe and kind and I know where I stand with him.
Oh. That was a wet blanket smothering her. If she did fall in love again, it would be for the right reasons.
I never truly fell completely in love in the first place.
Anyway, no rebound in sight. She was totally over the man. He wasn’t as sexy as Raphael, nor as kind and selfless, or as gorgeous.
Shoving upright, Isabella headed for the exit. The cafeteria had become too small and airless. A few minutes alone outdoors might help unscramble her mind. Might not, either, but she had to try.